Doing what? Okay, right, mm hmm. Hello to all of you. Hearts rise up podcast listeners. Thank you for tuning your heart's in for another episode of this podcast. I'm carol chapman, your co host today? I also have two other co hosts on the show and Sorry and Concetta antonelli. And on this podcast we share our own personal experiences, tips and strategies, along with powerful stories and compelling insights from guests that we interview. Our purpose is to inspire you to rise up to your best and highest self, tap into your own inner wisdom and elevate your state of being, your life and the world around you. It's that simple. So let's get right into today's episode. I wanna welcome Ansari and Concetta antonelli drumroll. Hello carol. Hello, hello and hello carol.
Hey, it's so great to for us to be on all together, this is the first time that we've been able to make this happen. And you know, in the very beginning when we started this podcast about a year ago, we had all intentions of having an episode that would give us the opportunity to express why we were starting this podcast, what we hope to accomplish and just, you know what we were really trying to, to do with it. But somewhere along the line, we that didn't happen. Um and but it's a good thing in some respects because it's given us an opportunity to really see how the show has developed and and how it has evolved over this last year, wouldn't you say? Do you all have any thoughts about that and that's why we're here today is to close to one year now we want to share, why we're here, why we're doing this. And it also gives we have a different richer perspective as a result of having done this for about a year now.
I agree. I think the word evolved is the key one to tune in on, because each interview that we have done and each blog that we've done has really enriched the vision and kind of changed it a little bit. So I think this is the perfect time to be doing this particular three way interview. I agree as well. I was just thinking in terms of of yeah, the same thing that that word evolved and how we've been able two learn from just the experience of doing these podcasts and finding what works what's best, what isn't and changing as we need to. And it sounds a bit like being a human being on the planet. It does. You know, what's really interesting is I have had the opportunity to get some feedback from people who have listened to the show and one of the things that really surfaces is that they really liked the stories, the stories that that we share the stories that our guests share of the challenges that they've experienced in life and how they've, you know, turn things around or face those challenges and and the the key learning as a result of it and it has helped others what I'm finding it, it is helping others by learning from what others are doing and how they are, you know, tackling life basically.
Well, that leads us into our first question and I think, yes, which is why are we doing this podcast? So why don't we start with you an and then Concetta will move to you and then I'll come in, How's that sound? That sounds great. Well, I guess we have to go back to quite a few years ago, 1984 85 86, when we all got together and met and were taking part in a meditation group and also a kind of a consciousness raising experience that over our friendship and over those years has really just solidified and grown and now that we are more mature, we know more about what it is, we want to improve in ourselves, but we also want to share what we've experienced and in the people that we've met that have also gone through challenges and experience higher consciousness and living in our best self every day.
And so I think that's why when you approached me to come and join you in Concetta and being a part of this enterprise, I was excited about it because it is a way to serve others, but it's also a way to continue to deepen our own experience of evolution and and creating a better self, I couldn't agree more. You said it just perfectly, I the thing I would add from my perspective is that I know there are people out there who are lost in suffering and I want them to know and I think of course we want them to know that they're not alone and there are tools which I've learned. I think the three of us have learned over our that time from the 80s, probably just all of our lives, but from the 80s on that we've we've been using and it's to show that people that they can connect to their best self. The truth is they're always connected. And this is one of the things I've learned is that I keep seeming to seem to keep forgetting that I am always connected to my best self, it's just sometimes we all need tools to feel reconnected to that.
And the really wonderful thing is that we have them. Uh and and since as you said, we've we've had life experience and and now we want to share some of that with other folks. I couldn't have said that any better to be honest with you because we have we have learned a lot along the way since those early days. And you know, everything is all the power is within us, all the answers are within us. And, you know, one of the reasons that I wanted to do this podcast was to not only share my own learning and things that I've discovered over the years that have helped me and but just my own journey of awakening, you know, the trials and tribulations of just rising up to my my better self, my best self and and I think it's important to bring conversations and people together, two to share their their journeys of awakening, their own personal struggles and the Haas that they have experienced in their lifetime is helping them to move forward.
And I know that my, you know, my own journey has been one of just understanding who I am, my true self and being true to that. And I think it's just this podcast gives us the opportunity to be part of a much, I guess, larger movement of healing and change on our planet, because there is significant upheaval, incredible change that's occurring on many levels, you know, at least it appears that way on the surface, but perhaps it's not as fractured as we think it is. So, I think that we have the opportunity to help others be better discover and explore their best self and and refine it within themselves. And that's really what I hope that this podcast will be able to accomplish this, make a difference in the lives of others and help others just really tap into their own, their own personal power for the betterment of themselves and for others in the world.
I agree, and I think that looking back over just these 10 months, almost a year now that that I think that's happening and I know for myself it's been happening inside of myself just participating in this, that that um and I really liked that phrase you use bringing conversations and people together and what I have heard feedback I've heard. And also just listening to the podcast, there's a sense of being able to resonate that. As I said, we're not alone. It's it's very easy when there's things shifting and changing and we have transitions which we can see on the macro and the micro levels uh to think that we're alone in all of this. Um that that is a false truth. And do you have anything else? I think everything that both of you have said or that all of us have said leads into you had asked us about our personal inspirational quote or personal mantra and I think my looking back on my whole life, the thing that really ignites me is being able to serve others.
And so my favorite quote is from Edith Warton, you probably both know it too. There are two ways of spreading light. One is to be the candle or to be the mirror that reflects it. And to me that's what this podcast helps people do. And every interview that we've done has made me just, I'm just blown away and it makes me want to just interview everyone, everyone that I know because everyone has a story and everyone can benefit from hearing what other people have gone through. It gives such encouragement and promise for people to improve their own lives. So I think a big part of it is being, learning to be self aware and knowing that no matter where you're from or what you've done or what you're going to do that we have that opportunity to explore ourselves, ask for someone, maybe some feedback from people some help, but also just to dig in and do the work we want to do to make changes in our life if there's something we want to do differently this podcast and hearts rise up and the blogs and everything or just another tool as you said Concetta, hmm and I got chills when you, you said that quote, it is one of my favorites as well, my since uh it came out, I'm thinking it came out in the seventies, um my mantra and and something that has been inspirational to me is a song by dan Fogelberg and it's called Part of the Plan and I'm going to read some of the lyrics from it and this describes my journey from the moment I found the this song and it says I have these moments all steady and strong.
I'm feeling so holy and humble. The next thing I know I'm all worried and weak and I feel myself starting to crumble, the meanings get lost and the teachings get tossed and you don't know what you're going to do next. You wait for the sun, but it never quite comes. Some kind of message comes through to you. Some kind of message comes through and it says to you love when you can cry when you have to be he, who you must. It's the part of the plan await your arrival with simple survival and one day we'll all understand and the meaning of this for me, particularly the chorus is that it reminds me that there is only one me and my purpose is to be the best me possible, all of me. Even when I'm wavering, even when I'm not sure about myself, even though I've done all this study, I've followed all these self help advice, all this self help advice, all these things, all of me including my lower and my higher self.
So the message for me is do my work live my purpose and the arrival are those moments of insight, the shifts and any of the behavior changes that lead me to understanding and growth now. Did I say that was easy? Oh no, no, there's lots of bumps in there. But it just, it also brings me back to what I see us doing here together is hopefully showing people that that's that's how simple it is, even if it's not easy. That is so so beautiful. Thank you for sharing that that just like it just warms my heart. It really does just everything you just said. Uh and I love that song, I mean it's one of my favorite songs of all time. I love dan Fogelberg, I don't know whatever happened to him, I guess he's still around but and and and I love yours too as well. Both of them really speak a lot to me and if I could share mine, it's, I don't really have a quote, but it's it's been a mantra as of late, one of my favorite symbols is the heart, I love hearts and so my mantra these days have been following your heart and so I take a lot of time to listen and follow my heart and when I do that I know that I'm I'm never going to veer off course my heart is connected to a higher wisdom within me and that higher wisdom I know never, ever ever lies.
And if I follow that then I know that I'm being true to myself. I just want others to do the same to follow their heart because if you just stop and and listen, you'll feel it and you'll know the what the answers are for anything that that you're struggling with or dealing with in your life. I agree. I think that we often find the answers we know we should follow, but so many times there are obstacles like fear or lack of courage or rejection, things like that. And I think that is what seeking help from others can do, whether it's really what you read or what you hear or just working one on one with somebody, it really can help you build confidence and self esteem and so many people suffer from low self esteem or lack of self esteem and following your heart knowing what your heart wants to do, but not knowing or not having the tools to take that step forward and being kind of stuck in the past and your experiences of the past.
So I think that your whole concept and premise with hearts rise up is a way to serve so many people Yeah, and and it is true to come back to our hearts. I find that I default to my mind because of exactly what you were saying and is that it's a behavior that has served me really well, especially when I was working in corporate America in the early 80s, there was less heart in corporate America carol and I worked to take over as a matter of fact and and we, we had to kind of the story of our meeting um for I believe that we were going to have a drink, we have been working at the bank for a while and yet we didn't know we had something in common because we were each hiding a crystal underneath our corporate outfit, our corporate uh I know it was so funny, it was so funny yours fell out by the state or you know somehow it fell out.
We both, they were necklace. We had crystal necklaces. And you you I saw yours. And then I remember, I think I pulled mine out. You did So funny. It was because at that moment it just reminds me of the what you said. And is it that the heart, you know, is is we've got to go to that. And so in corporate America there we were in our minds And um, of course we helped us do our job and get paid and everything. But actually behind it all was what I I would say was my symbol to remember my heart, remember where I am. And um well, it may not sometimes seem safe to come from that perspective just to know that you're always connected there. And hence here we are with our podcast hearts rise up and we um I want people to have that that comfort perhaps with their heart and knowing that even if sometimes we have to use our mind and and as well that ultimately the heart does have a place at the table, so to speak.
Exactly. And so now Oh boy, we should dive right into some of the juicy stuff. What do you think? Mm hmm. Because this this is going to be talking about how the challenges can sometimes actually surprising us. It's as if it is uh teaching us how to come back to the heart with those challenges. Well, either one of you, would you like to talk about your challenges and maybe share a story about how you encountered them and what you learned from, from those challenges and would you like to lead us off? Oh sure, sure. I guess I'm going to go back to when I was a teenager and I think Looking back over my life, especially in the last 10 years or so, I know that this event in my life really had a significant impact that had far reaching repercussions and until recently it kind of guided and put boundaries and parameters on my life that I'm now ready to let go of.
But what happened was I was the oldest of four Children and my brother who was eight had a car, he had an accident, he was riding his bicycle and he was hit by a car. He was killed instantly and it was devastating of course for our family, but my eye was the oldest and I felt like I had to then kind of shed my youth and become the responsible adult and be like hide feelings and emotions and seeing your parents fall apart was very difficult. Seeing your brother and sister kind of clam up and and even looking back In the past 20 years, I see still the repercussions of his this accident and what happened in our family at the time at that time, there wasn't a lot of grief counseling, there wasn't a lot of people reaching out to help of course neighbors and things did. But there wasn't a lot of counseling type of help.
So to help people through grief like there are today. So I think that that had an effect on my whole life where I squashed emotion for a long time. I felt like I had to be responsible and I didn't really have as much fun as I might have had in my teenage years. And then as an adult and going in through college, I was very drawn to the whole concept of death and dying and grief. And it did leave me down a really wonderful career path in a way in that I worked for a hospice for a time and I was also a hospice volunteer. And it really showed me the importance of being able to help people in this very vulnerable time in their lives. So that in a good way it had positive implications. But in another way I let it kind of defined me in that I was responsible. I was the babysitter at the time. And so I did not want to make decisions going in the future even in the past 10 years, I didn't want to just make any decisions that might have an implication in somebody's life and not of course life and death, but you know, making any daily day to day to day decisions.
So as a manager of a bookstore, I had trouble deciding and things and in my own personal life especially I have trouble making decisions but in looking back and especially listening to the most recent interview that I don't think has been posted yet of Tommy Breedlove. I heard a great quote called are you going to live your life or you're going to live your story? No, I love stories. It's a yeah, it's a very powerful quote and he mentioned the name of the person who said it to him, but don't let your past define you is what I learned out of that that you are the beautiful being that you are and yes, all these experiences happen to us all, but that doesn't mean you have to live in that shadow. That you can be the bright, beautiful, shining person that is inside your heart and you don't have to be pulled back by anything that will any ties to the past.
You can have your, you can respect your past but you don't have to be defined by your past. That was the biggest challenge that I've had a lot of other little challenges. But I think that was the one that had the most definition in making me who I am. Well, it's amazing that you know, the things that people go through, everyone has not just one or two, but like numerous things throughout the lifetime and I'm just, I'm fascinated every time I even talked with the two of you because I learn new stuff, believe it or not. You know I learned new things about you and then I'm also reminded of things like you and because I remember you sharing that story with me years ago. I'll just kind of use that as a segway I guess into my own challenges because I've experienced numerous but I experienced the same thing. I lost a brother and to suicide and he was just shy of 21. And that well that was a really tough.
I mean I actually lost my voice for probably 10 days. I just got laryngitis. I could not everything closed up I could not I could not voice anything. I just closed up and and that really that really shook me. And then another time That and I've had like I said numerous ones but another major event for me was when I hit 45 and I just come back from the U. S. And from an international assignment. So I've been working um for three years in Asia and finally it sort of cut the corporate cord and after a long career like 23 years and it took a lot to let go. But I I suffered an aneurysm and the brain aneurysm and it and that was like 2.5 months after I I came back from the U. S. So that was a just a huge wake up call for me and it was also reaffirming call to me because I was I had made the decision to cut the corporate cord.
So it's a it's a it's a good thing that I did because who knows, I might have been in one of the farthest reaches of china, you know, at the time that I suffered the aneurysm and not able to get to a hospital. But I was very fortunate obviously and you all knew me at the time of that. I was living in colorado and and Connie, you were actually living in colorado at the same time too. But we were quite a distance apart what I learned from both of those experiences my brother passing away and my own experience of nearly losing my life because really, literally it was a brain bust. And I was very, very fortunate that I did not lose my life because most aneurysms, you know, people die once once you have one and if it bus. And so for me, both of those had just made me realize just how precious life is and we have to make the very most of it because you never know what what can happen.
And so at that time I had been questioning a lot about what I was going to do with the rest of my life because it was a reaffirming wake up call and it just, it may be stronger and it made me more determined to move forward because I've always been a lifelong learner. I've always, so I and I found I found my rhythm, I found my direction, you know from that point forward, I, you know, pursued some additional certifications, like an executive coaching and then expanded that into a broader personal growth coaching, life coaching, you know, took a certification program, emotional intelligence, I just wanted to do better myself. I I've always been that lifelong learner and so for me it was important to and and also really got more into a meditation as a deeper meditation practice because when I was working in corporate, didn't hardly have any time.
I was just working so much. And it's it's interesting how these things in our lives can have a significant impact or awakening, you know, a hub, how we need to to move forward. And they and it did change me for the better I have to admit having the brain aneurysm. We are so glad you're still with us, carol. Me too, Me too. How about your challenge story? Well, first I want to share the the direct impact for me is that that first time I knew about your your loss and and what I wanted, what I want to comment on is in this moment, what what loss I mean, we can loss of a person in our life, loss of, of our mobility, loss of our health, all the losses. It brought me even more in the present moment.
Um, and that can be a challenge for me is just to be with the reality of the impact of your stories on me that I can the sense of being very present and it was something I learned through my meditation practice. But it deepened when I went to neuropathy university. Um and I learned a lot about not um compartmentalizing the feelings in other words, just feel it just be and how grief and how loss can bring us right back to our hearts. It's not pleasant. It doesn't always feel good. But what I'm hearing from both of you is when you, when you allow that, there's incredible power in it and there's also um, in it's it's what the tibetan buddhist often referred to as having a soft front, but a strong back.
So you're you've got the support, but you can still stay in your heart, you can still stay in all of that. So it occurs to me to to um say wow for for both of you and remembering those stories because yeah, you're both still on the planet and and we're all learning and to to be able to continue on is really the, the stories of resilience and it's got me thinking about the losses and and how easy it is for me to push them aside. So the challenge, I mean I have, I have a challenge that is is more, it reminds me of the challenge I am going to talk about is that, that people mirror back to me, what I need to learn. And particularly I consider myself as a group group apologized. I'm a self proclaimed group apologized because I mean, I can, I can remember from being a teenager that I just naturally brought people together or I was the president of this.
Or uh as a matter of fact, even today I'm a president of an association, so I continue to be in groups and I find that as a facilitator, it is one of the most challenging and yet the most rewarding experiences and my biggest challenge there is just to distinguish between what are my issues, What are my, what is my story? I love that quote, do I want to live my life or my story and what is their story? And is there a way that we can benefit from that? But also like you were saying, and to kind of step aside from your story and not make it the story of your life. Um, and I recently had a situation in my association where there were two members who were at odds and they didn't want to talk to each other. And so they decided it because I'm the leader that I'm the one that is supposed to mitigate their problems.
And one of those people, their their behavior affected a lot of other people in the, in our group and all of us who it had affected, basically were able to set a boundary with this person and say, okay, you've gone as far as you need to, that's as far as I'm going to let you take it and the other person that they were happy, he was having a disagreement with, did not want to do that. And you know, I talked about this in my initial reaction in in the blog post, how using love as an action improves your life. And my initial reaction was not from that higher self, that wonderful heart, art focused. That's where I had to go to look at my own story. And some of the issues that brought up for me was I certainly wanted to be fair, but behind that was I wanted to avoid conflict and to be liked and I wanted this all came from a childhood where um I had some challenges that that wasn't happening and I felt really alone.
So I could feel that part of myself. So what I learned from that is it's okay to accept, oh, the perspectives and that it's not my job to always solve conflict for people. And whether they like me or not, sometimes it's their lesson. You know, they've they've got to go and do their work and that it's important for me to hear my story even from the wounded child or my lower self for the ego. And that I realize to what Marie for leo says everything is figure out a ble and really sometimes I just have to let other people figure it out. So, again, it comes back to for me, the there was your stories touched me to the point where I realized I've just learned something else about that particular challenge of being in groups. There's also a sense of loss when yes, it's their job to figure things out, but then I don't have a job.
Oh dear. Now, what do I do that opens the door for anything? It does, yeah. You have to be tied down by trying to navigate the the world of, you know, people that are just bickering or can't get along, you know? So what else, what else do we want to talk about? We were going to talk about our ah ha moment that have kind of helped move us along the path. I had a couple of things happened, one when I was in graduate school, we had some courses on self awareness which were fascinating and in one of the classes, I being one of the older people, seasoned people in the class, A young man who is 20, said to me as we were doing an exercise. Well what is it you have all this experience? What is it you're afraid of? It was kind of like a pail of cold water poured over my head. Whoa, so perceptive and how am I coming across to people and here, I think I'm self confident and all that.
And then the other thing was out of that same class and I think I put a blog out about it was creating a timeline of your life with some of the major things in your life so that you can see what has brought you to where you are today and how you don't need to be trying to be like somebody else. But to really value and love your own unique self. And then the other ah ha moment goes to our programming in our kind of the neuro linguistic programming. For a long time. My major mission is to serve others and it is still to serve others. That's what really fills me. But I always avoided the word self serving. But I have learned since that, you know, if we don't, especially with my hospice work. If we don't take care of ourselves, we're no good to anyone else. We can't take care of other people. We really have to put in the time and the effort and the love to take care of ourselves.
And that is not self serving, but serving self. And I think that's really important. So for me, it's serve God, then serve self, then serve others. So the first three of my aha moment about you guys. I love those when I was caring for my father, we did hospice at home for him. And that lesson came home to me because we we forget. I mean it seems I've always been able to shoulder a lot of responsibility, but I'm human and we have to remember that. That's an intense situation and it was some of the gifts that the, the hospice volunteers gave me was to say, no, you you need to have some time off. You you at least need to go do something else. And and I began to realize how important it was to do that. And continuing even even today, you you're reminding me when you were talking about being true to yourself. My Aha moment was a recent experience and I ask in september, I had asked for more ease.
I wanted life not to be easy, but I wanted to have ease in life so that there was, I could be more In tune with whatever the flow was and that I, and so I asked for that. And for 14 months I was planning to participate in an art exhibition and this was part of my, my Dream goal was to participate in an art exhibition. And then I had that on my list since I was 11. So I was excited to have been asked to participate 14 months. I attempted to do two canvases in in what they had asked me for the theme and the style they needed a certain size. The beginning of october a month before the exhibition. I was so stressed. I said, this isn't coming together. So what happened was that I sat down and and said, I'm I've got to get this done for the exhibition and kept getting blocked.
Nothing would go on the canvas or whatever I put there did not go along with the vision I had. So I wrote the curator and I said I'm backing out of the exhibition and didn't even explain a whole lot. And the minute I sent the email I relaxed and I said there'll be another time a week later I was showing some of my work to one of the curators is that I had been doing that I really enjoyed doing and a little light went on over her head and she sent a photo to the other curators and that person said tell her to do that. And I, I pulled my piece together. It's totally different from what it, it had the theme. I was using a tree um to, to show the connection and growth of of humans and are and the the relationship between um the United States and France.
So in three weeks I finished my piece and there was a specific spot for me. It wasn't with all the other, but it was perfect. It was as if it was the missing link for that particular exhibition. So from that my Aha moment was it's certainly scary to be in midair as you know, I see it as some just in that moment of going, oh well, now what do I do? I've got three weeks to get this done. But I had asked for ease. So there is that phrase, be careful what you ask for and this is how it manifested and I could not have orchestrated this any better and the exhibition was a grand success, not just because of my piece, but wow, there was so much matt and just just being true to myself and my own process, I was willing to give up being in that my dream, I was willing to let it wait. And obviously the Divine had another plan for me in that process is I mean that's just incredible.
Just I mean you basically just follow your instinct. You let go and surrender and when you let go of expectations or outcomes, beautiful things happen because you got out of your own way. Yes, you literally got out of your own way and that was it and I call it a trapeze moment. You know, I, I let go of my trapeze with no idea if I had a net under me or anything and honestly my view is that Divine sent another trapeze when I let go, not before. Okay carol, What was your Aha moment? Well, I've had several aha moments throughout my lifetime, but I guess maybe the, the one that really stands out the most is when I made the decision to leave corporate because I used to define myself by my corporate status ain't that crazy. But being a baby boomer that what baby boomers do and I still, you know, I had this stuck Nous because not not in that way, but this stuck nous of things around being a baby boomer, you know, and stuck in my ways because or my thought patterns or what I was led to believe when I was growing up that I needed to be, when I made the decision to cut the corporate cord, it was just a big relief, a big release and it was almost as if I don't need any of that to define who I am, it doesn't matter how much money I make or what title I have, you know, that it's just just letting it go and that just sent me on a journey on the inside to really take the opportunity to define for myself who I was basically by getting in touch with my true self as opposed to what I thought others expected out of me or what society expected out of me, and that was that was really, really healthy for me to do that and that, and that was a big step for me and so ever since then I've I've taken that that moment that it gave me courage because I had a hard time letting go, but it gave me tremendous strength and courage two not care anymore about what others thought of me just to do what I felt was right and be, you know, be the best human being that that I could possibly be and it and it just explore new things about myself and what I was capable of doing and and so since that time I've, you know, became an independent entrepreneur and I have done my own thing and it's liberating.
But that way it's liberating. It freed you up. Exactly. And it was it was a trapeze moment. You have to write something about this. I think I'm seeing this now. Yes, that that there you are hanging in midair because you let go of that trapeze. I'm loving it. Well, I know we're getting close to our time. If we follow what we normally do for our listeners on our lightning rounds, Shall we delve into that? Yes, yes, please do. Alright. Pancetta. Please tell us your reading. Speaking in nature, making art and reading. What about your love learning things carol. Well, I have several, I guess number one is physical exercise and that's so important to me. And I love to eat healthy and there's several other things. But I mean really it's physical exercise, eating healthy. And I do love a luscious bottle of Shiraz from time to time.
That sounds good. What lifts you up for me? It's animals, especially my puppies. And also being in nature, particularly using my photography and taking pictures of leaves and trees and roots and bark and just all the incredible designs in nature. I would love that. Mm hmm What about you control? Well we did. We both asked at the same time I'll go I'll go first. Um I think just what lifts me up is inspiring stories. People who inspire me, there's always something to learn in a good story. Well I I have several and now I have more to add because I've listened to you already. And um I'm beginning to see a theme hiking, walking in nature, making art and reading lift me up as well. Um animals helping humans and animals. I have a gratitude journal that's known as the book of positive aspects. So that lifts me up and being with and sharing with friends.
And when I asked myself this question, I this last one surprised me but it is the truth working in groups, in a group toward a common goal. So engaging in purposeful work and that's what we're doing here. That's beautiful. Yeah. I love it. I love it. Yeah, I love all that too. I love to read too. It's like just trying to find enough time right to do everything. That's that's the hardest part. What's our next one on the list? What? Oh what helps us feel grounded and centered for me. It's meditation and then nature and also service, service to others whether it's animals or people. But like you said working in a group even compounds the experience. Exactly. And I think I would probably do know that meditation is definitely my go to for grounding myself and feeling centered and and and working out you know that that does a lot for me because it, it really gets me in touch with what's going on in my body when I'm working out and stretching.
And so those two things or what helps me feel grounded in the center and also a nice cup of tea. I love all threats of tea, you know? Um, it's it's wonderful. Well, as I said, I have a theme hiking, walking in nature, making art and reading. And um, I think that the meditation is, is there, I guess I didn't add it just simply because it's, it's been with me for so long, but it's true just taking some time to just meditate and particularly in nature. I find that that's uh a great way to get centered and grounded carol. What is the best advice you've received from someone? Well, I tend to remember things just recent things that happen in my life, but I know there's been like so much advice over the years that I have had from others recently. It came from a good friend of mine and I don't think you've met him yet, um, but and knows him and that's Christopher Drummond, whom we interviewed On our 2nd episode.
And it was the advice that had come from a book that he had read called surrender the surrender experiment by Michael Singer. And it's all about just letting go, surrendering is not really about giving up, but it's about just letting go and not resisting letting go of preconceived outcomes or expectations. And when you do that, you're basically allowing just the divine to kind of flow through you and you're accepting what is and allowing life to unfold more naturally as opposed to trying to force an outcome. And I've been really trying to do that as of late is to just go with the flow and allow life to unfold. It doesn't mean that you can't plan and and think about things for the future, but it really is important to be in the now and allow life too unfold.
And you just you can experience it more fully when you do that as opposed to feeling like you want something to turn out a certain way or you want your data turn out a certain way because I think when we surrender where we can be pleasantly surprised with what life has to offer us and all the good things that come our way. So I think that that's a good piece of advice and it's given me a little bit more peace these days. I'm not feeling as anxious about getting things done and making progress. So yeah, that's the best advice I've received recently. It sounds like it took a lot of pressure that the letting go in a way kind of surprised you in that it released that pressure and you actually, well on one side you can get things done more things done or perhaps just things done at a more fulfilling pace.
And also it sounded like it just gave you a lot of joy. Well it does. And it stems back from, you know, being a baby boomer, we're not taught to just surrender, you know, as baby boomers, we're taught to just charge ahead and we pave our path and we go for it as opposed to just allowing life to unfold and just enjoying it and being immersed in every moment as opposed to trying to force things to happen within our lives. And you know, that's been a big learning point for me because I've always been kind of like that type a personality, just go after whatever I want. And but sometimes what you think you want isn't necessarily what you need and that's where the going with the flow and the surrender has really helped me to just be in a state of presence and be in a state of accepting and enjoying and being at peace as opposed to feeling that anxiety because I haven't accomplished something because once you accomplish something that you want to accomplish something else.
So I don't know that I'm really making sense, but it feels right for me right now. No intuit Yes, Yeah, there's just no end to it that I can relate to this. I have a sense that I must get all of this checked off my list before I can relax. But the truth is, and my meditation teacher said one day, there's no end to the list because you'll just get more and, and so that's why not relax into the flow of it. Uh and and it is a balance. There are the other side of it is that sometimes we do have to push on and get through a certain list, but I think what you're saying is within reason. Exactly. And it really kind of goes back to again what I said about sometimes you think you want something, but that's not really what you want, you know? So when you surrender, you allow whatever is in your highest good to come to you and you have the option at that point to know in your heart, if it yes, and I'm over here nodding my head, no one can see me nodding my head.
Okay, what about you anne, well there's a few things that came to mind and one is from my grandmother when I was younger and just because of different family situations in her own losses in life. And I think I asked her some one time like why life isn't fair? And she said, no, life is not fair, but life is beautiful and it's all we have and you have to appreciate every moment. So that stuck with me. And then recently as I mentioned before the interview with Tommy Breedlove, he mentioned to people's quotes that he lives by and one of them I mentioned already, are you going to live your life or you're going to live your story. And the other one which was just like an Aha moment was participate in your own rescue. You can't rely on other people to fix things for you. You have to do the work yourself. You can get all kinds of advice, but you have to actually do the work. And then the third one that always helps me out there is the common refrain of just breathe.
So just take a deep breath and let it out. It calms the whole body. Those are mine. What about you Connie. Mm hmm. Well, you're reminding me of of a a scene from a movie that I when it came out, this just breathe was the, the version of Cinderella and I am I am just blanking the name of it. But it it she when she arrives at the ball and this was with Drew Barrymore, whatever that version was. She arrives at the ball ready to go in and she's just as you say, she's she's very anxious and she's standing there and she says that she goes, just breathe. So I have that image with that one. Um, the other thing that came to mind is when you were talking about participating in your own rescue. Um I remember a quote, there are no victims only volunteers. And it it seems a little harsh in in that.
But there is true, there are victims. But I think that that the idea behind that is that you can take an action. Yes. You may have had a lot of challenges and a lot of trauma. And but you can take action that leads into my, my advice I received, which is it's an inside job. You have to know yourself first. And, and it's your job. No one else can do your spirit. Well, no one I can, I'm the one that can do my work, both my in any of it, my spiritual work, my, um, working on my behaviors, all of that. It's an inside job. So I try and keep that in my and of course I go back to my song be who you must. And so that's it again, being true to myself. And it's, that's a part of the plan. That's been some of the best advice for me along the way. I love that one. You know, it's an inside job because really if we don't work on ourselves and focus on ourselves, how can we possibly do or serve anyone else if we're not taking the time two deal with our own, our own issues and really understand who we are and what we're all about.
Aren't we? Lucky to have those things. And I think sometimes it, it pays off to type them out and put them in a, on your visor, in your car, on your mirror, in your bathroom or you know, the ones that really serve you at the time. Well, shall we move on to our next concept, which is that's advice we've received, What advice do we have for others to rise up to their best and their highest self, which fits right in with the hearts rise up in the whole concept. Yeah, Mom is gonna let you go first. Okay. I think when I think about all the work that we've done and all the work I've done previous eyes, the big deal is to be gentle and kind to yourself because we're such a our harshest critics sometimes and also so be kind and gentle to yourself, ask for help but be ready to do the hard work which ties back into those other quotes and also to become self aware sometimes you just kind of pull your way through life and at some point you have to stop and say, am I who am I, what am I doing?
What are my goals and what impact do I want to have? How do I get there? But if you're not self aware, then it's a really tough struggle and you end up in your later years and you as I saw so many times with people in the work I was doing with hospice. Too many regrets. So to try to live your life your best life now as opposed to putting it off till tomorrow. I love that, that's that's so important for all of us to keep in mind. And that kind of leads me to if I if I may just share mine. But I think it's important for all of us to be. And my advice is to be patient with yourself and two, in order to rise up to your best self, you have to allow your your the feelings in your heart to come through.
And because, like I think I said this earlier uh in the podcast, is that the heart never lies. And so it you've just got to follow your heart with everything that you do and and and in all your interactions with others and all your decisions, your actions just follow your heart and your heart will lead you to, you know, a state of peace, but at the same time it will ensure that you do right by others and that you do right by yourself. And I think that's really important is that we do right by ourselves. Because when we when we do right by ourselves, then we're more capable of becoming our best self and living in our best self. Well, I guess that means it's my turn. I go back to what ANne said uh when in doubt breathe at least take a deep breath. Um I spent a good part of my life thinking that you had to act.
You had to do something, but in truth, it's you don't okay in a in a dangerous situation. Yes, of course we we have to react. We have to do something, some action. But in general, my advice is to take a deep breath and a pause and step back and just take a moment always. And no matter what, I think it's important that you remember that you got this sometimes you got to say that to yourself because it's really, really easy to doubt that you and you don't feel like you can rise up to your best self. But the truth is that power is always always inside of a person. Even if they think that all everything is lost and they feel that they're abandoned, their lost. There's always one threat. I think anyway, I believe that we all have one thread.
And so in that moment when you're breathing, you look for your threat. It could be in the form of just a feeling or it could be someone shows up just at the right moment. And I go back to it's an inside job. Just keep remembering that all of that is inside of you and at any moment you can rise up to your best self. Well said, I think love it. Yeah, that's beautiful. All these good tips will really make my day. That's for sure. I know I'm looking forward to listening to this podcast. Me too. And I guess on that note, we'll just end it. And um we'll just say, we hope that all of our listeners for those of you out there that have I had the opportunity to listen to this. We thank you for being with us and we look forward to many more episodes and just be who you are and any party comments gals.
No, I look forward to many more heartfelt conversations that will also be able to inspire others and I just as you said, and I'm feeling inspired as well. So um this has been great for me. Wait, don't go yet. Stay with us Just a bit longer before you go. We hope today's show helped to bring a bit more joy and happiness into your heart. We also hope that it inspired you to unleash your own inner power and to rise up to your best and loving heart centered, highest south. Just a few things before we go, we'd be so grateful if you'd leave us a review on Itunes because those reviews are so important to our show and we'd love for you to subscribe to our podcast and share the show with others, particularly those episodes that are your favorite. And we'd love it. If you let us know what tips and strategies you use to rise up to your highest self. You can reach out to us at www dot hearts rise up dot com or you can email us at Hello at Hart's Rise up dot com.
Well, that's it for now. Until next time. Keep rising up and they love and happiness always be in your heart. Bye for now, Okay.