gary. This is hey beautiful. The podcast where we bend and recap every episode of How I met your mother. No spoilers. So suit up, grab a sandwich and settle in hi kate. It's so good to see you. You too Welcome Welcome back everybody. It's been a summer. It's been a summer. Usually our summers are crazy and this has been no exception. How how have you been? Well spent the last two days at work setting up my space. So mad about it because it's summer and I'm not getting paid and trash. My room looks presentable, but there's so much sh it I need to do and I'm like, I'm not spending any more of my summer and my friend is, she can't even get into her room yet because they haven't finished cleaning it Where Custodians were like, we have we the 29th and we have back to school night on the 29th.

And that's the thing. Like we're supposed to be on the schedule for monday. We have one hour from I think 12 to 1 half Hour is for lunch, which they just increased from 25 minutes, so half hour for lunch and the other half is in our room and then we have to be ready for parents at three. Oh my God, it's expected that you come in and you don't get paid and somebody complained about to the union because I'm on the contract negotiation committee and I was really disheartened because there were comments made about how well we're getting paid throughout the summer and I raised my hand. I was like, I'm getting paid for the work I did on the last last school year through this, I'm not getting paid, I'm paid for 100 and 85 contract days or 88 something like that. Yeah, that does not include the summer south garbage kind of grouchy and that, that's just expected that like something is kind of like, well you're still getting a paycheck. No, Not for the work that I'm actually doing.

two of my friends have been in district for six years. They both have master's degrees. Um and there was a posting for an administrative assistant position and the position is higher salary than my friends have been working for six years. They should apply for it. But we were talking about dude, I would, I mean I know somebody who is in like, he's like a teaching coach and she wants to be a gym teacher now. She's like, this fucking sucks like why I want to get, you know, I just want a job that like, doesn't make me feel like I want to jump off a building. So I went in yesterday for the first time all summer and I next year if I'm still there, um my room gets cleaned first because it's in a different wing that's not used at all. So my room has been cleaned and ready to unpack since June 27. So next year I'm gonna do that and then I'm going to ship but went into school yesterday and then immediately went home immediately logged on to the public so students or public service forgiveness loan loan forgiveness immediately went on re re certified, like filled out the form to get re certified for the most up to date count and sent that to HR to sign because I can't, I'm like, nope, I got just submitted one a few months ago.

I'm like, oh, I need those extra three months because I'm at a 100 and 500 and five of 120 and they don't, they have like a year almost. That's awesome. Yeah, that's great. That's great. Hi. Um Yeah, I just got back from the first vacation that knock on wood went well this whole summer, every time we try to take a break this summer, something horrendous happened. Um So this was the first time that we got away, everything was ok, went to michigan, everything was fine. Um and we just had a wonderful time with our friends at the lake, just so I feel like human again before we left there was like car issues and health issues in the family and you know, the whole thing. So um just very, very grateful for that for that week. Did you bring fudge home for your family? Did she's so sweet, isn't she? Your mom? She was like, I'll show you the sights too.

Oh, they're so cute when they talk to each other. Mrs Mouse's lizzie's mom. Mr and mrs Mouse, they're such sweet little people. Yeah, they're so cute. Which makes sense because of Liz is just like as lovely and yeah and we so her parents came up to the lake house for a couple of days and these people, I don't know, it's it's a midwest thing, they love being in the car, like they love driving around and it makes me want to die. Exactly, exactly. Um But we did end up going to this town called Northport which is like on one of the like the little uh Peninsulas that goes into Lake michigan and we happened to be there the day that there was a dog parade and the theme was Alice in Wonderland, adorable. Yes. Yes, yes. I just couldn't figure it out. But that was it was so adorable. Like it had already ended and so it was just dogs all over town, just dressed like different characters.

It was really really, really so this time the car trips were worth it. Good. Yeah, that's important. Yeah, but I'm just I feel very grateful to have had just a week where nothing went wrong, you know, like just a week. It was not asking for too much. They're just seven days trying not to. Yeah. All right, so all right. Not a lot at the top of this episode, we're gonna keep it tight because we have the second half of carter bases interview and we don't really care about her. Also Zoe, you know what, I think, I think the issue is the big issue with Zoe besides our stupid hats. I counted four in this episode alone, so we're just gonna keep a dumb hat tally. Perfect as we go. Um The thing is we know she's not the mother and I think that that, I mean I would not have liked her as a candidate anyway, but knowing that it's like why do we even want to care, why do we even want to care about this character?

So I'm just like already and then she's so she's so bad for ted and so abrasive and I'm just like rating and just sucking hat. So the blonde problem continues for ted the blonde plague. No one who's blonde on this show ends up being a good person besides barney, but blonde women, the blonde women do not, It does not bode well at least for 10, the Blonde Menace continues. So here we are, we're at Zoe. Um but it is really cool to have talked to carter about uh the Arcadian and that connection. Um so if you haven't heard the full interview, the rest of it's going to be in this episode or if you're on Patreon you can listen to the whole thing at once. So it's really, really good girl. Me neither. It was it was so great. So thank you to carter, he in the second half of the interview, he reads an excerpt from a mutual friend and it was, it was a section that Caitlin and I both loved.

Yes. Um so you'll love that. It's gonna be about halfway through this episode. So, um, that's, that's pretty much it. The only other thing that I put these, the top of the show notes is that Neil Patrick Harris is new show on coupled is out. Um and he was also on hot ones, which is one of my favorite youtube shows Caitlyn, are you familiar with wings that get progressively? Um yeah, so I haven't watched them yet but I will be watching it. I'm sure it's gonna be hilarious because the show is just so good. We should watch it together. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we can do that. Um okay, so Caitlin if you wanna interest is it 11 at 11? Okay. We're at nine legendary moments and I'll let you take it away from here. Hmm. This episode is brought to you by our Patreon pals, especially our Almighty five members, Ben Adam Tish and johnny, Our Patreon family has 70 members and counting and are sliding scale means no matter what you can afford, you can enjoy all the perks.

We offer, that means early access to every episode. We make private live streams with us exclusive recaps of How I Met Your Father and you can join for just as little as $2 a month at Patreon dot com slash hey beautiful pod. So this is season six, episode five, architect of destruction. It first aired on october 18th, 2010. I almost said 2020. That was silly. It was written by bays and thomas and directed by pam fryman. So bays and thomas wrote this episode I guess because it's introducing kind of a big character and the big theme of the arcadian, right? Yeah. And also, um, so I started listening to the private joke podcast because it starts with season six and I was kind of bummed that I had forgotten about it and I listened to all the previous episodes and they were great and had a lot of good insight, which I can't remember now. So I apologize, but they had steven, Lloyd and Robbia, Rashad who they didn't write the episode, but they gave some insight and they did um, uh shoot, what is it called punching up or not?

Yeah, you have to like add jokes. Um, and, but one thing that they talked about in terms of Zoe and ted and you brought this up to is like, why do we care? So yeah, And it's kind of intentional about this adversarial relationship because it's a 66 season, we still haven't found the mom and he's matched with a few people and things haven't worked out for whatever reason, but this is totally different. Like it's just a bad match from the beginning and yeah, and that was kind of like the intent behind it was just to have this like really poor relationship and just all the things that kind of like can go wrong and the idea of a nemesis is kind of fun ted hasn't really had that. Yeah, so and another insight I'll talk about later is um the locker room talk to but we'll get there. Oh, interesting. Yeah. As you were saying, like the adversarial thing that it's bad from the beginning, I was thinking about the triangle of a good relationship, right?

The chemistry compatibility and timing. I mean obviously compatibility is missing. Like they are nothing alike and they Yeah. Um but even chemist chemistry, not really there. So it's literally just, he happened to be on the street when this pretty girl walked like that timing is working out and that they just happen to encounter one another, but but she's also married. Yeah, so like, what are we doing here? What are we doing? So not even the timing is there? This triangle is it's yeah, in tatters on the floor. So starting off great ted and I guess that's true. It is interesting for him to have an adversary, but she's not funny. Like she's not funny and I don't know if it's I'm gonna say it's the acting because the writing is always really good. I'm gonna say it's the acting because I've seen her in other things and she's always the same.

She's like, she's more serious, she's not she's not funny. And so if if she had been like kind of like, like a Henrietta hilarious would be a funny adversary, right? Like that level or a Patrice spoilers ahead, you know? But it's just like, she's supposed to be like, I don't know, there's, it just doesn't, it's not doing it for me, but that's fine. That's fine. That's fine. It's agreed she doesn't and the hats don't help because the whole time she's in she's in the hat and the scarf and the gloves and I get it because she's hiding her ring the whole time. But like ted just in like a blazer and I'm like, what? Why are you time of year? Is it why are you, do you have a circulation problem? Like what is white?

I know a couple of people with that who put the white tips up. I told my doctor was like my feet and fingers are like regularly, like numb and cold, jesus. Are you anemic anemic? Well that's always been my excuse for why I can't give blood. I will like hit the floor. I literally, I can barely give blood, Do blood work for like medical reasons, I hope to work up to that because very admirable and noble and it's needed anyway, 2010 and remember teddy Westside is living his dream working with his two buddies designing his very own skyscraper until it's all going swimmingly until he realizes the location of this new building is going to be demolishing the Arcadian which is a fictional um building.

But per the wiki pages model after the hotel pennsylvania. Fun fact that hotel actually was just recently demolished. Oh really? Yeah, it took like many of like, I have like paragraphs of like how it like, you know, got approved and it got shut down and approved and shut down. But um and because it was like a landmark kind of thing is that kind of like, yeah, there were some things about like um the thing is they never approved the present, the Preservation Committee Landmark's Preservation committee declined it. So gotcha. The thing about new york is Ted, I don't know where you're going to find a building that isn't old to build. There isn't fresh real estate in Manhattan Dude, you're gonna have to pull up a building like you're gonna have to plant some snake eggs. I don't anyway, so you know, ted being like a super architectural nerd loving old stuff.

It's kind of hard for him to like swallow the idea of knocking down this beautiful historic building, you know, in favor of just like some sort of skyscraper that's sort of his beautiful design. Yeah, that's, you know, gonna be amazing. It's not gonna be some like rectangular box, yeah, a penis or a penis for a T rex or a T rex with a stripper in the end, a stripping. So then ted goes to tell barney that he can't design the building for him because um it's just you know, not it's not, it's not worth it for him. Um And there's like a little funny thing where previously like beginning of the scene like they're gonna do its legend wait for it, but I will send you an inter office mail and then the next scene ted comes in and yeah, with marshall and lily, you know, they're still trying to have a baby and they go all out to really like set the tone to for like every time they're trying to have a baby, like there's weird rose petals, like no rose petals on the sheets.

I'm just like, who's going to clean that up? Honestly, it's so much, it feels like so much pressure. It feels like there's a lot of pressure, music, mood lighting, all the things, even to the point where like papa can't even get any, some can't even get some traction with his slipper socks because lily feels so on aroused that um So you know, moving right along within that little scene like as they're about to get busy. I'm not really sure like all this heavy stuff for like setting the mood and then Mark lilly just throws out that, you know max and Robin are have really hit it off, they hooked up, he's got a small penis, they have a lot of common date and then marshall like freaks out that he cannot know this information. um because that's all he can think of and lily's like, it doesn't even matter. And he's like, what are you talking about? Like rushes out of the room.

So kind of have like our setup for that for the episode. We've got marshall and lily still trying to have a baby, still trying to do some sexy stuff and then ted battling against his moral compass with, you know, destroying this beautiful building. But is that really true? Right? Is it really, Is it really about that? No, no, I will point out in the cold open, we have Coco peru one of the most famous drag queens who hits on ted, I did not bring up the, she's been in all kinds of stuff she was in to Wong foo, I mean she's, she's a legend, She's been doing her thing for a zillion years, always in the same iconic red wig. She's great. Um there's definitely um kind of a conflation confusion of drag queens and trans people and also sex workers in this using queen and I think they said tranny even tranny is said interchangeably and it's all Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So yeah, I mean it was 2010 Rupaul's drag race was barely a thing if at all has it started yet. So I think a lot of, a lot of the drag queen and and gender queer trans stuff is still not something that uh gen X, like gen X dudes know anything about gen X sis had guys know anything about or writing about like that's it's just how it is like that stuff is not mainstream yet. Um And like this was like the end, I think it was the end of like the use of tranny as like not a horrendous horrible thing in the mainstream culture. So R. I. P. To those jokes, not really just kidding there. They suck. And Zoe saying it made me hate her even more so uh you have me rethinking this eye shadow. I'm like you're just no, No one. Yeah. Like Oh you think I'm a man? It's just like it's just the whole the whole thing sucks, but that's fine.

Whatever we know. Yeah moving on. It's a fart. We know it's a fart. Um All right, so ted is then explaining to people explaining to barney more about why he can't tear down this building because he loves old things and you know he and Zoe had bonded over old how great it is to be old, blah blah blah blah blah. But then we get a classic barney is um that barney barney has decided to die on the hill of new is always better. New is always better. I love when he says you know what's better than than like the hot girl I just left with like the roommate. I haven't even seen naked yet because Okay, okay okay. I mean jay z cheated on Beyonce. So I mean new, new is new is different. New often feels different. Maybe not better, but it feels different to people like barney. Um but there are, there are very quickly some holes in his new is always better.

There's the star Wars movies which then he has to double down on that. That must have killed him inside to do and then there's of course jumbo jim's grape scotch. Don't let it touch your statues. Good to see Wendy, the waitress. I feel like I haven't seen her in a while. Bless bless. Um so yeah, he's, he's trying to still go new is always better like push forward, don't worry about things. Um and then lily and marshall come in and I think Robin's there too and they talk a little bit about the max penis thing, whatever, blah, blah, blah. But the big thing is we get, we get a where's the poop Robin? But for ted which is who's the girl? Who the heck is it? That is making you second guess literally the only thing you have ever consistently wanted in your life. This is it. He worked so so hard to try to build a skyscraper when he was at the firm that he started his own architecture firm to try to get to that place.

He's teaching architecture, still wanting to build a building and here it is the culmination of his life's dreams and he's going to give it up for some girl he met on the street. What? That's the perfect question is who is she? Because that is exactly what's going on and his friends know him very well. Um, and then I say enter Zoe and her first dumb hat. Um, she happens to know things about architecture. Of course it's because she's trying to save the building and she has this petition. Um, and I love the line from barney of that's so romantic. I want to fill a suitcase with dead batteries and beat you with it. But yeah, so we find out who the girl who the girl is, it's, it's Zoe and ted signs this position, this petition to save the Arcadian even though he is the architect of destruction, great wrestling name, great wrestling name and she has no idea. So that sets up the rub, the rub of this episode is when she's gonna find out, how is it going to go.

So at, so now we're at the double date finally and with marshall and lily and max and Robin and max is talking about his decision to start his own law firm and we just get like this insight into what marshall's thinking about and it is only that max has a small penis and that is literally the only thing he can, he can think about small penis, small penis. I love, he's like think of any two words that aren't small penis got it, small penis penis, small penis a small penis. So good. It's like literally like, it just is the only thought running through his head and, and then Marshall then starts to kind of embarrass himself, where he starts to tell max that his law firm isn't that small. And and that was like, no, it's it's pretty small. Like the office is tiny, the conference room is tiny. Um He just like, can't marshal, can't let it go. Um and it's, it's kind of cringe.

Very, very, very large. And even like everything he says like is just cringe and you can really relate it back to the size. Like, you know, he talks about who's gonna get the porterhouse steak and last time it was huge and he's like, hold up, that reminds me of when barney and J Lo are at the bar and she's like touching his suit and he's like, the more you touch it, the softer it gets. Mine's the tiniest, you know about the, I love a tiny fiber. Oh, I love J lo. So good. So good. Um Yeah, yeah. So you know, everything is just about like how tiny things are and, and max gets up to use the bathroom and marshall just like embraces him for like a really long time and makes it like so uncomfortable. So weird. It's so uncomfortable. But he tells the girls that's the only thing you can think about is like, they're salty lady talk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry? Yeah, lily's like what about like lacquer room talk?

And marshall says it's always like super vague. It's I tapped it, I got some, I squeezed those. It's never anything specific. It's very, very generic and he's like, they're very discreet about it. And so on the private, on the livestream. The livestream. Oh my God, On the podcast, they talked about how that like that idea like came about in the writer's room. Um because did I just like cut out or did you actually hear me? I heard you okay because my computer was frozen. Yeah, like you froze for a minute, but I still had your audio, so Okay. Um Okay. Um so on the podcast um Robbia and Stephen, we're talking about the idea of like that locker room talk came up because like they're they have a very female heavy staff. Um a lot of female writers, directors or executive producer, unit production manager editors are all women, which is really, really unique and kind of gives them that female perspective, which is kind of where this idea of like um the locker room talk came about because like the female stuff didn't really have a lot of experience with it.

Just like lily and Robin, like, well aren't you talking that way? And yeah, it's like men imagining that every sleepover pillow fight. Yeah, Yeah. Yeah. It's not, it's usually talking about like sex or poop or like and then getting in a huge fight and crying. Yeah, yeah, eating a lot of snacks anyway. Um but marshall is just super thankful that he is married and not single because he would kill himself if lily talked about their sex life in that kind of detail and they're just like the silent exchange with marshall lily and Robin, he realizes that that's not true and Robin's response is perfect. She's like that argument has no traction. So it's just like so, so good. It's so good. It's so good. It's so good. So oh, I love it. Um I will say I was gonna say, oh um well first of all the locker room stuff, I mean I think hearing that now has a very different meaning now that all the trump stuff happened because his locker room talk was very specific, very specific and discussing.

Um but also I have to say that I love lilies sweater in the first scene, it's like brightly colored up here and then like normal, like black and white stripes at the bottom or something is really pretty. Her hair looks really good, Robin and lily look beautiful on this double date. Like the styling in this episode with the ladies is really, really good except for Zoe. Um and then okay, so then there is a little bit of a scene that I don't know if we skipped it or if you have this next, it's a carter base marshall gotcha okay. So um yeah, so I'll do this piece. So, um, the only reason Ted thinks that the Arcadian needs to be saved is because of Zoe we know this, but he didn't tell her that he's the architect, he said he was a vet. Um, and, and we learn unsurprisingly that Ted actually has a pretty extensive history of changing who he is, changing his hobbies, his um, wardrobe for girls that he meets and that he isn't all that serious with.

Um, so we see like a couple different versions of that over the years. One that popped out for me was Penelope taking him to Gettysburg. That feels like that's season one Penelope who taught him the rain dance because she was a history candidate and a PhD candidate. So I'm like, oh, maybe you could go on a couple dates with that Penelope. Um, so, and we also learned that marshall introduced lily to the Indigo girls, which I love and I was just thinking about it because Ted was like, I'm not changing as a person. I'm just realizing I like these things because of that person. And are you someone who find yourself doing that? Like sort of changing your interest because of the person you're with? Or or are you pretty like set in, um, I like to, I feel like I'm like so sheltered and naive in some ways that like, I like, uh, you know, I just haven't had a lot of life experiences, like when I was younger.

Uh and so but like, yes, I know, like there are things that are about me and I think having been divorced like that I know these things about myself, like are not changeable. Um but then there are things that like, I'm open to, like, new experiences or like trying something that maybe I would not have wanted or not have been open to before just because like, I shot a gun kate. I went clay. Oh, I want to do that. So bad. Skeet shooting. Yeah, it was so much fun. And I told chris like, our entire relationship never gonna shoot a gun. No interest in doing that. I don't want to do it. Yeah, I want to, I married, I married a hunter. So yeah. Yeah, I I agree with you that there there's like a line and honestly, I'll say I kind of love that. Ted is that open to his partner's interest because a lot of times in heterosexual relationships, it's the women showing up to watch the men do what they do, whether it's playing video games, skateboarding, whatever it is.

Like I had when I was dating dudes in high school, I watched so much skateboarding. So many terrible video games, video games. Yes. So it's or like going to their sporting events or whatever, but they never came to my ship. So I I'm cool with Ted being this open and enthusiastic about his partner's interest, but I do hope that he's not losing himself in these things. Um I think one of the keys might be when you break up with this person, do you completely revert back to who you were? Yeah, Do you incorporate that into your, into your life, you know? Um So I guess I have a feeling that a lot of it was just him trying to, you know, become somebody who was ready to be in a relationship with that person because he just wants, he wants that forever person. So bad. Um We also find out, you know that barney gNb is allegedly planting snake eggs in the arcadian to get people to move out because it's not just, it's not just an old building, people still live there.

So it's like this very rundown um slum basically, and Zoe shows up at the apartment the next day, a few days later in a second stupid hat. Um and she has stolen a bunch of tests seconds, we're at two stupid hats right now. She stole a bunch of test rabbits from a cosmetics company with her animal activist group. And right here, Ted probably should have known she was a bored rich lady, like let's let's be real because you see that rock on her finger, you don't even need to see the next episodes to know who the heck she is, but like girl, you're too old to be doing this and feeling like you're not gonna have any consequences truly. Um But she thinks Ted is a vet which is why she brought him the rabbits and I kind of I kind of wish we'd seen a scene of him with his vet supplies, like trying to act like he knew what he was doing with those animals because I'm surprised he got out of there with her still believing any of it honestly.

Um And we find out that she's been arrested for a lot of different things, quite a few things over the years and she is Making the promise that she's about to really turn up the heat on GNB and also specifically um the people that are building GNB, the new headquarters which is 10, she's just so unhinged. I know like Ted really cares that she likes architecture that much. She's that hot. No she's not. He's just so desperate. I mean it has been five plus years that he's been that only we've seen of him being you know trying so hard, being so vulnerable over and over again, screwing up, getting screwed, getting left at the altar, you know, falling in love with the wrong people and watching his friends kind of flourished romantically is probably just taking its toll on him. So I get it and this won't be the worst relationship he has which is that's still to come.

Um Now that's an adversary I'll say that was one that I enjoyed but it wasn't like that it was entertaining. Yes, exactly. Um So yeah so I understand it. It's just the Zoe that I don't love. Um So then Ted goes to G. M. B. And he refuses to let it go, Barney has been trying to get him to do it, but he can't and he says he cannot tear down the Arcadian and he wants to be off the project altogether. He's so dumb. So so dumb. So and he's so lucky, he's so lucky that this blew up as quickly as it did because he could have really, we don't know if he's gonna happen, but I mean if he had gotten off the project and it was completely scrapped at this point. And then, I mean imagine him seeing somebody else building his skyscraper, you know, like it would kill him. Like how it's so interesting for someone who's like thinks about the future all the time so short sighted in this way.

Like he was already like they scrapped the project once. Like you're replaceable, you're not and I think that we can I think that we are far enough into this show and we know enough about The Mother in the future and all that that it's not a spoiler to say that this project is Ted's baby, right? Like this is something that he's probably going to see to fruition because why would they bring it back just to cancel it a second time. And also it's very clear that he and Zoe are not going to work out. So to have him throw away his only dream on something that is very clearly not gonna work out would be a terrible sitcom choice. It would get way too dark. Like imagine how depressed he would be. So brand for him to this is all this, This too shall pass basically. Um but I think this is a great time for us to pop in the second half of our interview with carter bays.

So enjoy the show really opens up in season six and now it all, it all makes sense. Like you get to see that that series are happening, you know, like that you can feel that the engine really moving. Yeah, it was really fun to do. And the funny thing also is that like it really we also because we knew that like we're going to take this big step forward as a series. There's you're kind of always looking at like three arcs, there's like the series arc, the season arc and the episode arc and like sort of without every story, you're telling your sort of serving those three stories all at once. And the funny thing about season six is what it really was like, even though like we finally took this big step forward in the storytelling of the series in those two bookend scenes that the story itself is really self contained. Like I it's remember like sort of like when there's so there's there's an alternate ending for the series that we did. And and and and part of that is is Ted is the narrator, bob saget, God, God, sort of taking us through like what happens in the various seasons, like the whole story, like telling the whole story series.

And I remember at the time, like working on that, like you sort of realize like, oh nothing in season six actually affected Ted's story. Like it actually like he has this, he goes on this whole journey. But then at the end of it, he's kind of right back where he begins. It's just that he met, he he dated the wrong girl, was kind of what happened in that in that in that season. But but as its own sort of standalone thing, I sort of, I I've always kind of looked at that season is like its own like little novella of with the bigger story. That's awesome. I love that. I'm rambling. We we are, I really want to talk about the book. I don't know what you're time limits are so you can edit out as much of this as you want. And yeah, a final question about season six, before we start to talk about your book is um we're about to talk about Subway Wars, which is one of our favorites. What a good episode. Um that's a good one too because Craig was very he was very instrumental in that and, and, and chris, go on, sorry, I don't want to talk to Craig, I'm just making notes here.

Um but my question for you is, when did you first feel like a real new yorker? Wow, when did I first feel like a real new yorker? Um I, I mean, I'll tell you the truth. I, my first week in new york, I, I um this is gonna go, this is gonna just just trigger warning that this is gonna be gross. I mean, it's a new york story, so of course, but I, I am, I was staying craig and I had just gotten our job at Letterman, it's my first week, you know, working my dream job. And I was staying with my, my cousin, my cousin William, who is who I love dearly, who he lived on uh on 46th Street between ninth and 10th in what's known as Hell's Kitchen, which is a fantastic area and it's so lively in the theater district. Um but it's also historically, like, it's had some, some dodger elements to it.

And uh I was walking, walking to work one day and thinking like, oh my God, I live in new york, this is like, I'm like walking to new york, I, I'm walking to work, I'm like, he's on 46th Street, the theater. That Sullivan theater is on 53rd Street. So it's like a, like a 10 minute walk and it was just really excited. like my very first week, maybe my second day and I look over and there's a gentleman taking a B. M. Between two cars and and it was just this and and it really clicked for me like oh this is like I'm a new yorker, that's, it took two days and I'm a new yorker because and and there's a funny it's a funny thing too because like I saw that and then I don't I feel like I never saw anything like that again in the whole, but I also know that moment may have just like short circuited my brain in a way that everyone has to get short circuited at some point when they live in new york to sort of like filter that out like okay, I'm not saw that once, I don't need to see that again. So next time I walk by that I'm just gonna just a fire hydrant or something. Yeah, something like just a moped is parked there or something.

It's like my brain just. Yeah, exactly, exactly. The contrast of new york, Oh my gosh, alright, so let's talk about the mutual friend, we both love it so much. Um How would you sum it up for people who haven't read it yet? I know it's really hard because it's like yeah, I mean it's it's I I when I really tried to do with this was to take a big glass bell and put it over the world as as I saw it at that particular moment like starting in in 2015. Um and uh it's uh sort of I had a lot I wanted to say about technology and about the way that technology has changed the way we communicate and the way that I felt like at the moment, at the moment when I first started working on it, I just sort of felt like no one, I felt like we went from, oh my gosh, technology is going to change our lives to being completely over it immediately like, like at least at least like like presenting that that front of like yeah, you know, we're all online, what you gonna do?

That's that's just like and I felt like it just someone like me having been born in 1975 and and having lived on this straddled this, you know, my 1st 25 years, you know, I didn't have, you know, there was no world wide web and and now like my 2nd 25 years there's like everything is there. And and and so I I I sort of felt like I wanted to write something that sort of honors that and and honors the fact that that this is actually a big deal. Like this is the thing 100 years from now. This is the thing they're gonna point at as like how how life on earth changed like everything else is gonna go away and it's gonna be this was the this was the time when everything got connected and everything like and it and it it created a lot of it, a lot of good came from it I think. And I wanted to like really make that clear and make not right, something dystopian, right? Something sort of presents how like we're it's allowing us to be connected in ways that we've never been connected before. We can stay friends with the person we knew in elementary school, you know that in a way that you never would have in human history, but also it's it's created a lot of problems that weren't there before.

And so I just wanted to I wanted to tell that story. Uh and and so and and it's a bit of a it's an epic, it's a big it's a it's a big book, but but I I think the the the comment I keep hearing that I love the most is that people pick it up and think, oh my God this is gonna be so this is I can't read 480 pages and then they finish it within a day and yeah, I was super easy read. I was flying through it and then I realized I had a huge chunk of it read. I was just like no, it's almost over. I did not want it to be done. It was no, and I will say it does feel it doesn't feel dystopian, but it does kind of feel almost sci fi right? Like or speculative, like it could have been written like earlier, like in the very early days of the internet, like what could it possibly be like? But that just is how ridiculous the internet is now, right? It is everywhere. And it's everything. Yeah, that was that was a big thing cause I remember like when the Matrix came out, that was such a huge seminal movie for so many people and it and it totally presented, it was like finally someone did a virtual reality movie that actually like, like makes you feel like you're there and and really like really asked these philosophical questions in in a popcorn movie.

Uh and um and you know, I think it made everyone start seeing life that way and thinking like, oh my gosh, what if what if there was a Matrix, maybe we are in the Matrix. And it's sort of this realization like by you know, 2015, you know, 15 years after that movie came out, like it felt like we're actually, they're like we're actually spending so much time like having having, you know, you know outrageous arguments with our with our thumbs that you know, we never expressing these these unbelievable thoughts and not saying them out loud instead like just, you know, in in in text conversations and and we're like having flirtations and falling in love and and doing all these things without using our mouths, like, just using our thumbs and and it just yeah, I mean it's felt like more and more like I personally and something I was grappling with, like, I feel like and and this also happened like, you know, having having kids made me constantly aware of like, I I want to be present for my kids.

I don't want to be like, I have a memory of, you know, like, you know, my parents smoking cigarettes occasionally and like I so like I knew that like the cell phone is is the cigarette of my generation and like I want my kids to have this like frozen image of like their dad constantly on the phone on his phone. Yeah. And so like I I and and that was sort of like where kind of Alice's journey, like the center of the center of the book, it's it's a big story that encompasses a lot of things and has a lot of side trips and a lot of other stories and lots of sort of fun diversions. But at the center of it is just this this woman who like me just was trying to like do something in the real world and not be distracted and and that that was sort of like her her dragon to do battle with was distraction just like mine was. And so I wanted to to tell that story of c c if she could pull it off, see if she could actually like make it to the end of that journey without getting. Yeah.

I just loved the yeah it's just it's it's great. Yeah. No I mean we've burned through it. I kept I was like like literally like giggling out loud because I found like not because something in the book was funny just because I was delighted to be reading it and just the way it was written, you know like talk about like any the episodes that you would write with craig. Like there's scenes within scenes and flashbacks and forwards and here's the really more characters. And I loved that context. I love like just telling my husband like listen listen listen like alright, so like they're telling the story and then like the next paragraph, it's just like you shift the focus away to have like context collapse. Like I started using that in like my in like chatting with friends and I just love how it really like fills it out. But was it hard to write that extremely hard. And and and and I wanted I wanted to I was really trying to experiment with like writing in a way that gives you the feeling of what what you're reading and and like like with the like the the just the business, the busyness of like how like the the amount of information out there, it's just like static and it's hard to like stay like focused on one thing and, and and the narrator is sort of taking you all over, all over his universe as he's telling this very simple, straightforward story.

Uh and yes, it was it was very hard to write because it was uh you know, just over the course of this one summer, there's so many backs and force I there's so much to keep track of. I I had to use this sort of scheduling software to like sort of just make a calendar for myself of like, here's what this person is doing on this day, Here's what that person's doing on, on that date. You know, the test is on this date and there's sort of this running like kind of Tiktok through the, throughout the story of its its X days until the test, you know, and sort of like to keep you like, that was actually my editor had that idea of like doing that just to like give you some sort of like a through line to hang on to. So, you know, like are at any given time. Yeah, that's all we needed. I mean, that was that was perfect and I love like how there'd be like this established scene in the story and then you go back and you hear again from the other characters perspective and you get to see like how like you said, like the whole world was really like fleshed out. I told kate, I want this to be made into like you said on the A.

M. A. About like a tv series. I said I need to experience this like in the full sensory mode. Like I need to see it and like it's just like I yeah I I hope that that comes to me it's actually like this so sort of the back story of this this book was I I I knew I always I always knew I wanted to write a book but I never like I wasn't sure I had the I had it in me, you know it was it was scary like brand new thing that I I've never done. Um but this started as a as a pilot. Started as like like a tv like I had this idea and I you know, all I knew was to write tv. So I wrote it as a pilot and and then I brought it to to craig and craig and I worked on it together for for a number of years and we tried to sell it and uh and he had some wonderful contributions to it and then with his blessing at at a certain point I said like like when it didn't you know you you write enough pilots and and and you know you sort of learn in Hollywood that like pilots just generally speaking just don't go anywhere. Like you you write the pilot and you know it'll be one of eight if you're lucky it's one of eight pilots that, that any network or streamer is deciding between and so you know, two of those go forward and the other six just just die on the vine.

And um I had written enough pilots that like I sort of like we were kind of getting into this rhythm of like create these characters that you love and and give them, give them a challenge, give them a goal in life, give them, you know, set up this story. I mean you write a pilot to set up a great story so it's a chapter one and and suddenly sort of realized at a certain point like kind of written like 20 chapter ones and and there hasn't been a chapter two and I just started realizing like I, I need to, I need to tell a story all the way through from start to finish. I need to like I need, you know, it obviously How I Met your Mother was such a blessing and like to be able to do that was totally spoiled me in a way that like I like I can't, I can't like let go of a chapter one, like I need to like I need to follow through on it and and among those chapter ones like this one especially always sort of loomed very large for me because I just cared so much about Alice and all the characters were sort of like drawn from my own experience in my own, like, they're all, like, kind of size of who I am, I think, and and I just needed to, like, I needed to stop waiting for someone to give me permission to tell this story, and I needed to stop, like waiting for someone to give me millions of dollars to produce this story with actors and and, and lights and cameras.

And so I that was the thing that pushed me, pushed me over the top into, like, realizing, like, even though I I don't I've always, like, revered fiction and I love books and I love, like, I I I've always been like, a big reader and a big lover of fiction, but it's always been like this magic trick that I didn't know how they did it. And I kind of didn't want to know because I wanted to just like, just be dazzled every time I read a book. And so this was the first, it was something that, like, I really had to get over that I had to get over, I had to, like, decide like, I'm just gonna tell this story and and and do my best and and see how it comes together, and that's that's that's how it turned into a book, we're there, we're there authors, or, like, craft books that you were reading to learn more about how to write this book, where they're like, touchstones that you had going in, or was it really just, I'm just gonna sit down and do this, I ultimately, I mean, there were things, you know, like, Stephen King's book is everyone, everyone's read it and it's it's it's wonderful.

There was there was a moment where I just sort of, I had to realize, like, I I just, I I realize I can be, because I I've read a few of those books and I always just felt like I'm I'm I never I didn't go to, I didn't get an M. F. A. I didn't go to bread loaf or Yaddo, or one of those, you know, and I've always wanted to, and I always thought that those places are so cool, but I always felt like, well they're they're they're learning that's Hogwarts, and they're learning their wizard skills and I don't, I can't do wizardry, because I haven't gone to Hogwarts and I uh I sort of, the more I read, and the more I would read things like, like, like, like how to write a novel and how to do this, how to do that, the more I just felt like, I'm gonna I'm never gonna feel ready, I'm never going to feel like I've read 100 books on this and I've got my m F A now, I'm ready to write a novel, I even, I know knowing myself, like, I would go through all of that, and I would still feel like I'm a fraud, I can't do this, so I got an M. F. A. I feel like a fraud. But also it like it like I think it narrows your idea of what a novel should be to some degree.

Like depending on what you're taught, like what your book lists you're given and stuff. So it's education. Yeah, exactly. So I mean I I think you you know how to tell stories. So I think you went about it, do your thing. You clearly went about it the right way. I mean and that's and I did I did sort of that was it was just sort of said like what do I know how to do? And it was like, I know how to like go to or go to a dry erase board and break up a season into little stories and and you know, we've a little stories through a bigger arc. I knew how to do that. And so I was like, all right, I'll start there and I'll try doing that. But for fiction and and you know, right, like, you know, he said after every line or she said, you know, it's just a little just a little bit. And so yeah, that was cool. Okay, so I have to ask, there's a mention of louise marsh in this book there there's the there's the coin, I've been waiting for someone to catch that 83%.

I don't sound like I don't even remember that 83% was in there and I was like, I perked right up isn't going to catch Louise mark deep in the book. But so I guess my question is just for the first time, is this book part of the, yep, is this book part of the premium cinematic universe? I would love to say yes, but I'm gonna say no. I'm I I feel like I I want to like, yeah, I I partly for for legal reasons. Uh you know, I don't think I don't want I don't want Disney to own this book, but, but but no, like, I I just uh I yeah, I don't know. I for some reason, I I want I want there to be this kind of uh this, this hermetic seal between the two universes universe. I uh but I did use the name Louise Marsh because that was, I felt like I gotta do one of these and that, and that was, that was like, like, I didn't even use that name.

Like, you know, you're, you're just writing and you just put names in like, and for some reason, the name Louise March popped in my head and I was like, oh, that's funny, but I'll probably change it and then I and then I just never did. And it was kind of like, so that's so great that that makes me, that makes me very happy. There's there's tons of little stuff, like, I mean, I mean, and it's not, not him him stuff, but there's like, little easter eggs within the book. I really wrote it to be uh to be something that, like, the second time you read it and the third time you read it, you catch more and more things. There's some little, like, secret, like, stories threaded throughout that that I don't know, I hope someday someone will catch, but, like, little little tricks and little games and and I I, you know, I love all that stuff. So I put I put some some put I snuck a lot of easter eggs in there. I can't wait to reread it. I know, I know I told kate I bought it, so I have, like, physical hard, hard, and then I also had got by on my kindle. So I have, like, all the different formats, because I was traveling a lot and I was like, I need to take this with me.

It's just so, like I said, it was just delightful. It was just one of those books that I felt so excited to be reading. Um That's wonderful. That's really nice to hear. Thank you. Yeah, it's it's been a joy to read it. Um So, through Alice's studying, like, because as a writer, like, a lot of it just felt like you were talking about your own creative process. Like, you were saying, like, avoiding distractions, sitting down, getting, you know, doing it every day. Um There were a lot of tips throughout about the creative process. And so just wondering if there's one lesson you've learned through tv writing through novel writing, that's that's been the most helpful to you as as a as a creative and different genres. Yeah, there is actually, it's funny you say that because there is one particular piece of advice in this book that I didn't attribute to the person who gave it to me, although he got it from someone else, I don't know who he got from, but my cousin William, the from the from the guy Bm.

In between the cars, that story. Uh My cousin William, William brooks, he is a just a a true artist and someone who like, he was, he's a musician, a songwriter, he's written a lot of uh wonderful songs and and just has lived this this wonderful artist's life. Uh and he and I love him very dearly. And he told me something once years ago and I don't know, I've never I haven't even talked about him to him about this sense, but he told me that a bit of advice that someone gave him was if you leave your art for one day, your art, leave you for three. Yes, that was about the piano teacher and I used that and and and and in hindsight, I wish I had, like, credited him for telling me that within in the in the acknowledgements of the book, but I'm acknowledging him now. So, if anyone hears this William when I thought about like the math and it's true, like the longer you wait the harder. Yeah, and and yeah, and even if the math doesn't work out perfectly, I think it definitely feels anecdotally, like I feel that way like yeah, just like do something creative every day, like you have to keep it and that is the make it a, like I'm very big on on rhythms and and like it's definitely like that was the thing that got this over the hump was me saying like I'm gonna, I'm going to approach this exercise.

I don't approach exercise like that. I probably exercise just just every day, got to do something, do do a little bit every day I get, you know, I set a goal of like at first it was 500 words a day. And then once I started like after a few weeks of that I sort of realized like, oh I'm like, I'm really, I'm starting to like get into the groove of knowing how to do this and and it upped it to 750 words a day. And then by the end it was like 1000 words a day and it really just just make it something that you rhythmically do in your life and don't even take weekends if you can, if you can help it and I know that that's it's hard because life gets in the way and I have three kids. So it was it was like this real hero of this book is my wife and the are caretakers who took care of our kids, just just making that possible. But uh but yeah, just, just doing it every day, I think like that's that's being being uh consistent consistency is the key.

I think that's my favorite, that's I think we should leave it there. So we we'd love to hear um a little excerpt from the book for our for our friends. Okay, sure. Yeah, I'd be happy to and I'm actually gonna be reading this is kind of neat, this is the UK version. Version. Yeah, it's beautiful. Yeah, it's it's yeah, it's it's I'm very curious, I'm very I'm gonna be curious to see what the reading experience is because it's like, you don't think that like people judge a book by its cover, but you know, I inevitably like when you think of your favorite books, you think of their covers and curious how how how the reading experience will be different for people that read it with this one as opposed to the other one, but I'm not one of my old man glasses now. Alright, so I'm gonna be reading. This is a section from the from the first, the first chapter. So, so we're towards the beginning, so you're not getting any huge spoilers or anything, but there's a character named Bill, who is Alice's brother, Alice's uh brother who uh sort of a back story on Bill is, he's a uh an internet entrepreneur.

He designed a, an app called Me Want That, which is a sort of uh an app that really it's just puts things in front of you that you might want and if and you just keep swiping through until you find something that you want, you click it and it sends it to your door. Uh and and Bill is at a place in his life where he developed this app, uh made a made a lot of money and cashed out. And now he and his wife live on the Upper West side and he has no job and he has no idea what he's gonna do with the rest of his life. And he's sort of, but he's this this very like high achieving guy who suddenly has nothing to work on and he needs something to, to fill that hole in his life and the thing that ends up filling that hole or, or starts to fill that hole here is he just really starts to have a bit of a, a, a bit of a religious crisis, a bit of a spiritual crisis. And he uh he's walking along, I'm giving a lot of back story here, but he's he's walking along with his wife and his sister, they're, they're just strolling along riverside drive and they pass by this statue, it's a real statue.

If you go to new york, you can, you can see it, it's 100 and something, I can't remember exactly the, what, what cross street, but it's this, this buddhist church that has a, this amazing statue that was brought over from uh, from Japan of this uh this buddhist monk named shin Ron Shonan and, and it's a, it's a real statue and and Bill sees the statue and it triggers something in him and he realizes like, I don't know anything about buddhism, I don't know anything about, about that whole like side of the spiritual side of myself, I want to explore this, I wanna, I wanna learn, I need, I need to like, I need to like fill my brain with, I gotta find out what buddhism is all about. What's this buddhism thing and it's just very like kind of bro attitude of like, I'm gonna do it and, and uh so his wife pitter Pat, uh is, she is just looking forward to a nice summer of the two of them hanging out and, and maybe shopping for a new apartment and just just just relaxing and having a good time and she can already sense that Bill is about to get swept away on this wave of of this, this new obsession, so that's that's everything you need to know for the set up.

So now we are in uh okay, well that's all I'm gonna say and now I'm gonna start reading. So here we go, This is the mutual friend. Starting on page 49 in your hymnals. Okay, Alright. You're in your UK handles I think. Same. Same. Okay, even out here in the woods. Bill couldn't stop thinking about shin Ron showman. The wind tickled the leaves on the forest floor crunched underfoot. But Bill wasn't there. He was on riverside drive, looking up at those sphinx like eyes looking out at nothing. Then the victim's mother started to cry and Bill remembered where he was a crime scene. The spring bloom had covered up every trace of Amanda Newsome's final moments said the host. But for Amanda's mother, it's all still very real. Back after the break. You have trouble making decisions. Floor can help. And Bill remembered where he was the swiss alps, A 22 minute, 22 minutes into a grueling bike ride, listening to a podcast. But then his wife said his name and Bill remembered where he was in his spare bedroom riding a very expensive stationary bike with a video screen and over 100 pre programmed rides.

Bill paused the alps and the podcast and took out his ear buds. Pitter Pat looked concerned, Thank you. She said, now please say all of that to me again. Bill took a moment to remember, what have they been talking about? Oh yeah, I signed up for a buddhism class. A buddhism class Introduction to east asian buddhism. It's a continuing education course at Columbia with carl. He doesn't normally teach in the summer, but this year he is the guy is a legend. He's like the guy for buddhism. The guy for buddhism. That's right. Isn't the guy for buddhism buddha? Well, yeah, but he's not teaching anymore. I thought you were taking the summer off. I am, he said, and only then noticed the worry in her eyes. Are you not okay with this? It's just a class. Of course, I'm okay with it. She replied, trying to be cool, but she couldn't be cool. But you know, it's not just a class. Sure it is right. It is. She laughed. I'm sorry. Have you met yourself? You're gonna take this class, You're gonna love it. You're gonna fill our apartment with all this buddhism stuff, you're gonna get all gung ho and Alpha about being a buddhist, you're gonna try and win buddhism when buddhism. That's like the opposite of what buddhism is about, he said.

But then upon reflection, But I mean, yeah, I think I could be like one of the all time great Buddhists had laughed because she knew he was, he was kidding, but she didn't laugh much because she knew he wasn't entirely kidding. Bill took her hand and kissed it. Look, you were right. He said, I need a thing and I don't know. I think my next thing might be buddhism. I mean, what else is it gonna be golf? Should I spend all day every day on the golf course and then come home and read golf magazines and watch golf videos and work on my swing or sailboats, cars maybe. What should my thing be? Cars, Golf or sailboats? He laughed, but she didn't me. She said, I want your thing to be me. Well, I mean obviously you're my thing. He said though he could now see it wasn't obvious at all. Come on pit. You'll always be my number one thing. This is just my other thing. The word sat for a moment and he knew to underline them by touching her arm, just the right way. She sometimes resented these moments when his hair was messy and his t shirt didn't quite reach the waistline of his bike shorts, his belly poked out and yet he still could say nothing wrong, but she was grateful for them too.

It's nice to have someone who thrills you. Okay. If this was the person he would now be, she would visualize the best possible version of that person and help him become it. Well, if you're going to go back to school, she said, you'll need a backpack. And so she set off into her phone to find a backpack. That was just so as bill went back to the alps, back to the woods and back to that patch of sidewalk on riverside drive. Hey, wonderful. You know what's really funny about that particular excerpt is that after I read that whole exchange, I laughed out loud and said to my husband, I said your bill and I'm pitter pat because when my husband goes all in, he goes all in and then I find him the accessory things to go with, but we love each other and he's not leaving me for Yeah, but I feel I'm sorry, I'm just talking over you. But I feel like that just like shows like how the book shifts like the focus of who's talking and where, what's going on and the idea of like virtual reality being completely real.

Yeah. And then he remembers he's on a bike. Yeah, yeah, we can be in so many different places all at once and yeah, like Roxy talks about how this world isn't real, like not real. Like, oh thank you, this has been, this has been incredible. I know we went over so thank you so much for sharing, sharing so much of your time with us. Um where can folks get your book? Where can they find you? Are you doing? It's in stores everywhere. Oh you know what, I'm gonna be doing a thing at this. I'm so bad at this. I'm gonna be doing a little book signing at R J Julia booksellers in Middletown Connecticut on monday, This coming monday. Uh I don't remember exactly the time, but I'll be there that up on the website or something and I'll put it up on mine so make sure that people know. But yeah, thank you so much.

Thank you guys so so and and we're so like craig and I talk about this all the time. It's so it's so cool that you guys are doing what you're doing. Like really we love your show, it's so yeah, it's just really wonderful. Mutual. The feeling is super mutual, but mutually friends. Such a great second half of the interview. I hope everybody enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed recording that. Yes, thank you so much carter, you know we love you and I will say when we were recording it with him and he said in the very beginning of the episode of the interview like something like I think we both heard him to say I would be on another episode but when I listened back he was like I think he said I would be on every episode. Like obviously we would never we would never hold him to that but it sounded like that's what he said and that's just just like Um we will try our best to get Carter back um for obviously season nine if not sooner.

Um We will also be interviewing craig thomas this fall. I'll just say that I hope gonna happen it's gonna happen. So thank you carter thank you in advance to craig can't wait to talk more about season six to dig more into the stuff that you that that craig had a had a big hand in. Um, so yeah, thank you guys so much. Hope you enjoyed the interview and let's finish up architect of destruction. Yeah, we still have two stupid hats to see. Yeah, just she's so annoying. Okay, so let me go back to my find, my notes were at the protest outside the Arcadian featuring dumb hat number three, I'll say, oh yeah, so he goes down to the Arcadian to like show his support and just as like, um he's like romanticize everything, a banner then like unfurls and they look up and it's ted and that stupid wizard costume when like barney like snapped a quick pic with his phone and he's got that like look and it basically, it says, you know, Ted mosby is the architect behind the new building and completely ruins any chance he has of pretending he's somebody else with Zoe.

So that whole vet thing goes out the window and Zoey's livid. And so then ted then heads home and goes back to the apartment and goes into the apartment and that's where barney is waiting for him. And he has yet again rented another swivel chair, turns around and this and he has the bunny because as you recall, Zoe brought these bunnies to his house to the apartment. Excuse me. And uh he, he reminds me of that like either way, like this building is getting torn down and you have the ability to build whatever you want, like you are the architect in charge of this building. Like you can make it look however you want. And then ted realizes, oh my God, the architect, I can build it to be whatever I want it to look like I can create this compromise. Yeah. So what I say good things. Exactly. So then he decides that he's going to uh create a design that will solve all of the problems and get everyone kind of on board and you know, he'll still design this building for G.

M. B. So that gets done. He still gets to design his building that's done and then he can make Zoe happy. So and isn't that the most important thing everybody? Okay, so next up we are in bed with marshall and lily, but Marshall can't stop thinking about Robin and we get this cutaway of Robin and lily, it's very sex in the city of them sitting in the corner with their cosmos dissecting the, the current sex act and how gross it is. He he thinks I like this, it looks disgusting. Who wants a giant pawing at their nether region. It's like clearly like what they like marshall's like worst fears like securities voiced like the lenny from of mice and men just like he just thinks about himself as this big like ogre around if that is something that he believes about himself or is that something um and we get a moment where marshall finally has to stop things and he says, I can't stop thinking about Robin and lily says, oh, that's happened to me a bunch of times.

Just lean into it, let it feed things and that is a very clear, actual lily. Our favorite, our girl shout out bisexual lily. Um, but marshall can't get back in the mood and he freaks out, runs out and thanks to not wearing socks in the hallway could have prevented that. Yeah, that's true. Um which I just love that of course. Um, at the Arcadian, it's another day of protesting and Zoe is as crazy as ever. She fucking defaces the billboard and puts Ted's number on there, which she only has because he signed a petition. I feel like that's gotta be. Yeah. And Also dumb hat number four four in one spoilers. No spoilers, but I have watched a few episodes ahead and they don't get better.

But all right, so we're at four. The count is currently four dumb hats in one episode. I'm picturing like you creating some sort of visual that's almost like a jib jab with all of her and her stupid just like, or just like her with one stupid hat and like her bias moving and there's like for like, like also like Jurassic park, you didn't say please uh you didn't say the magic word. Yeah. Anyway. Um, so yeah, so ted does like listen, I think, I think we can save the Arcadian, like I think, you know, maybe not the way you're thinking, but I think there's a way where we can incorporate the facade and blah blah blah blah blah and for the first time, for whatever reason, Zoe takes off her glove to touch the paper, I I'm not sure why, but she gets like real close and then ted it's a very thin conceit, right?

It's a very I must I'm so involved. I must take just like staring at it totally involved. Yeah. Turn around, turn around, sorry. And then Ted notices she's got a giant rock on her hand and he's like, are you married? She's like, yeah, just like super offhandedly and she's like wait a minute, wait a minute, wait, are you saying blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. And then Ted realizes that it's about the girl, it's not about saving the about the arcadia, it's about the girl, it's always about the girl, it doesn't matter how hot she is or like he's not an adrenaline junkie, like none of these things bless him for trying. But um so he realizes that yeah, it's about the girl and um he then takes the plans totally scrapped them and it's like the arcadia's trash and it's going and like done that's it. I will say this for Zoe, she introduces her husband to the show who is a character beloved by all that is the one shining moment of the show is her husband who we will meet very very soon good job.

Um Alright so later that night lily is on the phone with Robin in a very natural conversation that she clearly came up with herself. Um basically filling Robin in on how last night went when you know marshall first stormed out because he was so upset. But then he came back with this renewed vigor and he he took her and his manly musk filled the room and sure footed traction, traction. He was a complete stud, animalistic, animalistic Robbins. Like that sounds really well and she's even like saying I can't read that baby like it's so obvious that like mouthing it like a stage mom as like the daughter gives the monologue. Yes, it was so good. And I think one of my favorite parts of the scene too is like right, so like Robbins on the phone with like yeah that sounds real and she gets up and walks away and ted's in the background and then the camera like then zooms into him.

I just love like the idea of all this existing because it seems so separate. Yeah comes together at the same time. And yeah, so then we see ted over like mooning by the window like it felt like I would see Zoe again and then there she is there she is, she's at his house, she's brought an entire protest to his house and then I'll start egging his fucking window. What like she is like unhinged and there's nothing funny, there's nothing charming like she's not farming, it's not like and if I were Robin I would be fucking pissed and you know what it is? I think I think it really is like she's too old to be acting like this. Like if she was like And undergrad doing this stuff to a guy that she, you know like, but she's like in her 30s, she's fully married, she's fully married for like, she's so difficult to like and like I never liked her like in like to begin with but to have to watch her again and just like remember how just Yeah, I mean we'll learn more about her and I mean while it doesn't it doesn't make all this stuff like okay, but you kind of understand that she's just like she's flailing, she's lost in a way that ted is but she's just a more annoying person about to be honest.

I almost prefer Karen a 1000% prefer Karen, the original blonde, the original blonde, the one who started the curse and I don't even like Laura Prepon as an actress or a person either. Yeah, like yeah, like so we just feels, I feel like okay, I feel like it was clear Laura, Laura was playing a character named Karen, I really feel like Zoe is jennifer Boris. She had too much free time if she had too much free time. This is just her like just great. Let's just I don't know. Yeah. Give her give her something that you know, a limp or something that makes her not you girl a little eye or something like Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is somebody who has a little I yeah, I think we're gonna have to eventually rank all the blondes. But for me, Karen is Karen is great.

She you love to hate Karen because again, it's funny. This is like there aren't jokes where are like, there's nothing funny about her putting Ted's personal information on like doxing him basically. That that's just not funny. There's nothing the original dock sir. There's nothing funny about her stealing rabbits. Doesn't matter how evil a cosmetics company is. Like there's nothing funny about her egging his house and bringing other people. Honestly, it's giving strawberry vibes. It's giving straw meat is murder, ruining that delicious hibachi ah that's another random skank. Anyway. Anyway, anyway, uh so yeah, so then yeah, she store the eggs. So then we cut to the men's locker room and max is like, yeah, you know, I think I gotta break up with Robin, I love barney's like you with her, it's like very confusing for him and then he says, well there's just, you know, something that she's into and it makes him really uncomfortable and I love how barney and ted immediately know exactly what it is and they both kind of like stiff and they're like that is not for everybody, I totally get that and marshall's completely left in the dark because again, they don't kiss and tell apparently.

And uh and he's like, come on, come on, let me know, let me know. That's like dude bro, it's come on. Um so yeah, so he doesn't get to find out and then we see like the old man come over and just like put his leg up and you can see like there's like a a towel hanging that's covering up like his penis or you kind of see it on like the other side is like when Jack was little because you know, single mom, I would have to like, he would fight me if I would take him into the public restroom with me into the women's room, but he was a swimmer for a long, long or still as a swimmer. Um and we would go to the local pool where he would swim and I would take him into a unisex single stall bathroom and like, you know, change him out of his clothes or whatever and he was like mama, it's embarrassing. I want to go in the man's locker room and I was like, listen, you know, yeah, he came out of there like this, like why didn't, he was just like, I saw so many hairy butts and balls and balls and so we always laugh about like the old man, the locker room and then I said something to Jack recently about like how he's so grown and blah blah blah.

He's like a man now and he's like mama, I'm the one with the hairy but in the locker room now like maybe. No, don't do it. Don't be Murray. Yeah, that was his name Murray. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What do you think it was that Robin likes to do? Is it, is it the old? The only other thing I can think of because I guess it's kind of weird, but it's not that weird is that she and this is something we learned later that just kind of like a silly thing. She likes watching herself on tv during sex. Yeah, but that's not like super creepy. Maybe it is. I don't know, Barney would be into it. I think Barney would be like, oh, like not like, oh, that's not for everybody. But I just want to remind the audience of what an old king Clancy is. It's when a man has sex with a woman and gives her a cream pie and then pours maple syrup on her vagina and eats her out. That's eating a mixture of come and syrup. I don't remember us sharing that. Oh Well there's also, it also could be a sticky 69 situation with all we know is the syrup is involved.

Yeah, that's it, syrup and sex. I don't like either of those. I don't like combining food inside the bedroom. Like, especially like people are like whipped cream. I'm like the sticky, stinky dairy smell not to mention my belly does not like milk. I think I sent you. Like, did I send it to you on instagram? Like trust my gulp, trust my gut that she can't even handle milk. Yeah. Yeah. But like, you know like and then just like the stickiness of it. Same with like chocolate pudding. I don't want to find brown something in your feet later. I don't like, I don't want and I also don't, I don't want your saliva mixed with dairy or chocolate on my skin stinky. That is, I feel like that ship came from tv like tv. It's one of those things. People don't do it from like what was it the whipped cream bikini from? I don't want your laugh with.

I like it's all it's just so much work for a lot of reward. It's like it's like a transitioning. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But it's not, we're defiling carter's second. Sorry. No one listens this far into the episode. Yeah, we're fine. Alright. Let's do legendary moment. Okay. Speaking of transitions, let's scissor our way into legendary moments. Oh my God. Oh God my the back of my head hurts from laughing. Oh that's the best. You know. Alright. Alright. First up is Helena remember patrons, you get your legendary moments read in their entirety. And first up is Helena, Helena says, hey ladies, it's a bad mental health day today. So I figured why not send a bunch of legend. I'm watching the show anyway girl, I've been there smart still there.

I'm sorry. But yeah, that's him. Um The thing that makes you feel better, it's like an old friend. But we come back to again and again again. So I hope it helped you feel a little bit better. Self care, self care Zoe. I know it's not an unpopular opinion, but I do not like her and she almost ruins the season for me. This means I don't care about this episode. Episodes plot a plot all that much, especially when you factor in the transcripts have not aged well. However credit where credit is due. The plot did result in one of my favorite line in the show. Ted I know you love you love crappy old stuff. No one cares about. I have, I have a history degree. So I am the person who loves old crappy stuff that no one cares about and I'm sure all my friends and loved ones can relate to barney in that moment. I also love the b plot of this episode and that helps redeem it for me. Bonus legendary moment to snakes. I don't recall saying snakes. Another photo. Look out for my next email and approximately 22 minutes. Hey. Yeah, Helena did send a whole bunch at once. So that is another way to do it guys. If you're just sitting down for a binge, send them all in.

Just make sure they're labeled in their subject line. Helena. You did great, you did great for that. Okay next up is Avner and Honor says hi there case. This is such an enjoyable episode. Zoe is a controversial character. And our entry to the show in this episode maybe causes some frowning from a lot of fans. But when you think about it, this episode has a lot of good which brings me to my ledge mo ted and Barney's chemistry in this episode. Their interactions make it hilarious throughout and really shine some light on the value Barney brings into Ted's life. Have a nice day. Abner. Very good points. Barney helps blow this all up so he can continue to chase his dream. Did you die? No, I didn't die. Okay. What happened? Everything okay. The food I ordered to send to Jack. I forgot to change the address. Came here still. Oh no. Alright. It's fine. It's not it's fine. They're not they're not far it's fine. Recovery room now I want to eat it salad or pizza both and some focaccia. That's the kind of salad chad pasta.

I love I love the blacksmith. That's my jam. So also love but we we don't even call it recovery. It's just salads. And when we say salads it's always that salad. So like it's hard for me to like it's the only good salads. It's the only good side like there's and we go through periods of time when it's like, oh, and they're dressing the balsamic for getting out of this world out of this world. Okay. Anyway, alright, who's, let's see, Alpesh. Alpesh says, hey girls, I do not find this episode one to remember, I had to watch it again. Honestly allow the jokes seem outdated for me. However, my legendary moment for this episode is the final part where max talks about Robin's odd behavior. Ted and barney of course. No, it for marshall. However, it means over mystery. Take care of girls. Love the interview with carter bays. That was a wonderful gift for all of us. Thanks call pesh. Thank you. All right. Next up is chris and chris says, hey kate. Okay, I'm so sorry. I missed the live watch for subway wars.

I actually was in your area spending my mom's 80th birthday. I've never been to new England in summer. It's lovely. Oh, that's so nice. While I remember not enjoying the season very much so far. The episodes are much better than I recall this one. Had a really great job of acting from the cast as a whole in this one particular in, in this one particularly marshall's reaction to max's small penis and girl dog. So my legendary moment is the architectural wizard billboard. Just fantastic. Good one. Chris. Next up is adam. Adam says what a fun episode. I honestly forgot the whole penis joke thing from this episode. This is a story mover episode and it may not have been a fun one for most people. It shows how much tad changes just for a girl. I used to be like this, I tried to be cool and collected for brainy chick, badass motorcycle guy, for a biker chick and even an asshole drama guy for, for a spore spur, but none lasted spurt because none lasted because it wasn't me.

I'm a nerd. I love being a nerd, lovable goofball that I am my wife and I went to Comic Con last year for the first time and it's honestly the best time I've had because she's my missing piece about me. The legendary moment is when Ted walks out in the wizard robe and hat, it kills me. It's just so funny, super jealous. You talked to carter and listen to the whole interview that day because I was so excited and proud of you too. Thank you Adam. I was hoping when I found your show and listen to it that it would lead to this amazing job and I can't wait to see what you to do next. Your friend Adam. Thank you Adam, thank you so much. Okay, next up is Tish and pish says, hey ladies congrats on the big interview, I'm so proud of you both. Thanks Tish. I don't normally watch this episode, it's that I hate, it's not that I hate it. It's just a minute episode for me to be honest. Yeah, I did like the way barney transition the conversation by saying and speaking of a disappointing weenie, I think my legendary moment has to go to barney spinning around in that chair. I know he's done it before in season four but it just makes me laugh regards fish. Good one, fish. Thank you.

Alright, next is Rebecca. Rebecca's right? I struggled to find a legendary moment for this one. Eventually decided on when Zoe asked ted to sign the petition not knowing he's working for the enemy, then cuts back to Barney sitting the scotch out. I also like barney turning around in the chair with a rabbit like an evil movie villain. Finally, fantastic interview with carter loved it so much. Thank you. Thank you all. Okay, next up is Ben and Ben says, hey ladies, while I am not a fan of the Zoe storyline. Same are there Zoe fans out there? I want to, I want to know uh other than who she introduces us to no spoilers, that's what I said. Then I still enjoyed this episode. My legendary moment goes to barney, he has so many great moments from the billboard to the swivel with the rabbit. However my favorite has to be the running joke about snakes. It makes me laugh every time yours. Ben Also for the love of God boobs, I love these like solid C cup is like a moment for like respect or whatever.

Classic. Yeah, last but not least least is David. David, I take, can k I enjoy this episode from my perspective, it has a lot of good small jokes place throughout and starts such to continue some storylines. I think I have to ledge modes for this episode. First is the early scene with Ted and Barney, I get a kick out of Barney's wait for it and then maybe 20 seconds later, Trish walks in with an inter office memo and all it says is dairy and I laugh every time barney says, not now, Trish my other leg mo is the whole conversation between marshall and lily leading up to them trying to have sex, marshall socks, papa needs traction. The way lily slurps her egg and the whole scene is great. Also, if we discuss how Zoe says old is always better when she first meets ted not to give anything away, but I didn't quite catch that from my previous viewings. Just interesting, if you ask me stay, great, David. Thanks David. What is your legendary mom and Caitlin? Um I think I have to go with the conversation between pretender lily and Robin.

Like, I just like it just cracked me up them sitting there with their drinks. Um I also loved the snakes throughout the episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um I gotta give it to new is always better because it's it's an excellent runner that will take us through this season. It might even go further than that. Um But yeah, so I love that the whole thing with the grape scotch and all of that, So new is always better is definitely my number one. Alright, well everybody thank you for listening and we will see you next time for baby talk. Make sure to send in your legendary moments too. Hey, beautiful podcast at gmail dot com. Don't forget to put in the subject line. Um baby talks that way. We don't miss it. And if you love this recap, you can leave us a review on apple podcast, helps people to find us and helps our family to grow and be sure to subscribe on apple podcast, Spotify or stitcher. So you never miss a recap and we hope you come back next episode because it's gonna be legend.

Wait for it. This has been hey, beautiful with your host kate, Gordon and Caitlin turner. Our intro outro music is by owl