here's the question, what's going on inside the minds of top achievers that caused them to make extraordinary breakthroughs, both personally and professionally, My name is Tim Sure. And I invite you to join me as we take a deep dive into the unconscious mind and discover how to transform your biggest dreams into a reality. Welcome to the how to be mesmerizing podcast. Hey everybody welcome to how to be mesmerizing. It's Tim Fischer and today, whoa, we got a legend. Dr Dennis Wheatley is with us. Welcome to the program. Dennis very much tim you know, it's great to be with you. I've been away from the monitor and the screen. I was traveling mostly for the last 20 years, all throughout china and Asia and now I'm doing virtual me and it's good to be, you know, self isolated. I don't mind it because I'm up in a rent. So it's great to be on your program. Tim really enjoy sharing with you and very honored and privileged to be on your show. Well, the honor is certainly all mine. I will tell you that. Um yeah, it's nice not having to get on an airplane, you know, and and travel.
You've you've, you know, you've done so much great service for uh you know, for our world and for um for so many people I know um I've grew up listening to your programs and studying your strategies and your tools for how to be a winner, right, and how to really excel and live your best life and you know, so I just want to, first off, thank you for a lifetime of contribution and and making this world a better place than uh than it was when you got here. Well, thank you. It's amazing that you were listening in grammar school Junior High in high school. That's right, that's right. I started really young really a kid. That's right. So well let me ask you this, okay, um with all the experiences that you've had and all the things that you've gone through in your life. If someone said Dennis, what is the secret to success, what would you say? I would say that it is to be an optimist, no matter what I would say that you have to believe in something much greater than yourself to give you a purpose in life, so always be a servant leader, meaning that your belief system should be so strong that in the goodness of the universe and the opportunity that you believe you're as good as the best but no better than the rest.
So one of the most important things for me is that self esteem has nothing to do with ego or loving yourself in such a way that you place yourself better than anyone, it is having value, core value inside that you want to share with people. And that value in your potential is one of the most important things because unless you expect to be able to provide something of value to people, you won't put in the time, the effort in the study to do it. And the other thing that is really strong for me right now especially is taking individual personal responsibility for the outcomes. Uh, I've been talking to a lot of religious and spiritual leaders and, and I know that everyone has a different view of the responsibility that we have for the outcome in our life and a lot of people give that over and rightly so for them to their creator, my take on it is that God has given me the ability to choose to lead a good or a bad life depending on the role models and mentoring the what I watch, who I hang around, what I want to choose to be and I've chosen chosen to be part of the solution instead of the problem.
So I believe in in uh being a role model for others rather than being a critic and the world is full of critics and we need more role models. But I would say that the secret would be taking personal responsibility for your outcome by looking in the mirror and say, hey, after all I chose, it's me, so those things, you know, optimism, the big belief picture, uh, and also putting in the effort, you know, discipline, discipline doesn't mean punishment, everyone thinks it does, but discipline comes from the word disciple. So it means to be a student of history and a student of how to do things right? So we don't have to do everything by trial and error, wow, there's so much wisdom, their dentists so much and I think that the core of this is believing in ourselves and people feel weird or feel guilty or get uncomfortable when we talk about loving ourselves and taking care of ourselves because of these ideas that loving yourself or tooting your own horn or feeling proud of yourself makes you an egomaniac, right or somehow makes you a sinner, right?
When really loving yourself and taking care of yourself allows you to. Um I think it increases your faith in God and it increases your ability to follow through and do the work and strive to be the best that you can be with whatever it is that you're doing. And then when you feel that good kind love, then you want to share that with others. I don't, I don't see the benefit of making ourselves feel bad. No, well I don't either and many people have a different take on that. But if you stop to think about it, um you have value inside. If you don't have value inside, then what happens is you need people, you're dependent upon them, you're desperate through opinions, their attention. So unless you have love internalized, you have nothing to give, how could you give away an emotion that you don't already feel so love must be inside before it can be shared and when you share it, you lose nothing because you still have the value, still have the love and yet you've given more in value than you expect to receive in payments.
So I feel just the opposite. I feel if you're, if you're going to be deeply spiritual and religious about life then you want that love totally internalized so that you can give it to everyone you meet. And that's why I think it's so important to believe in your potential to believe in your dream when that's all you have to hang on to. Because if you base your life on externals, you're going to be always either happy or sad. But you're, if you're dependent on the outside, it doesn't work that way because there tomorrow you're going to be surprised again by something that is thrown at you. So I try to live inside out rather than outside in. Oh, I like that. I like that a lot. Yeah. That really is the key. And it's the message that all the wisest people I know are are sharing and have been sharing for a long time. But it just seems like it's more prevalent now are more important for people to hear this now than ever before.
You know with so many people on unemployment and so many people who have lost um family members due to the coronavirus um so many uh um suicide rate has gone up, You know like 32%. I mean we really need to learn how to love ourselves and, and on the flip side, a lot of successful people that I know have also said that um, in spite of the challenges, um, that have been happening with coronavirus, that the time with family, the ability to slow down the ability to have time to take care of yourself. Um that's been created by social isolating or not having to go to the office has also been a blessing. You know, it's the rainbow that comes out on the other side of the coronavirus. Well, that's true. And now people have asked me a lot and different than the ones you've been interviewing. I would be called almost last man standing, sorry. So I did the eulogy for wayne dyer, zig, Ziglar, uh robert, Schuller, Stephen Covey and jim Rohn.
So all of my peers in my age group are gone and bob proctor would be the closest to my, to my generation, but the other ones that you're interviewing or the next generation. So my friend, you know, brian and, and Mark victor Hansen and Les Brown are younger. In fact, what's really funny is I was in the audience sitting in the front row and john Maxwell came out on the stage and he said, hi, my name is john, he said, oh Dennis, uh there you are, gosh, you're my mentor. So we go backstage and I said, john don't say that and he said then why I said, because you're nearly 70 years old And if I'm your mentoring nearly 70, I'd have to be like, you know, Methuselah and I was in China and not very long ago actually, I was speaking in Wuhan, I was speaking in Shanghai and Beijing 50 cities. They have 90 cities with over a million people and we have nine.
Well, I mean we have nine. And so what's really interesting now is speaking about Confucius. Confucius say water conquer rock, water fluid, water winds, rock hard brittle. This young high school students came home and he said, wow, You went to school with Confucius. I said, No, no, he's 1800 years old. I'm only 800 years old. And he said, Oh, I just thought I said, No, we weren't classmates but studying him. So something else about what you're saying. So people say, okay, Dennis, you're, you're an octogenarian, You're getting way up there and you've been through recently, a surgeon made a mistake on an elective surgery. So I have an elective surgery. So I live to be 100. So my mother and grandmother have had a heart valve problem. So I got a new heart valve. He made a mistake. Cut my femoral artery nearly bled out on the operating table nearly died three more times. But and then took a year and a half to get back.
So here I am people saying, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, you're late eighties, you have a a lung issue. You've got a heart issue. What about the the respirator? The all the things that are going to happen, aren't you? I said I bring my egg game now. Wait a minute when things are going worse. I'm at my best because when things are going well, you coast we tend to be complacent and happy and fulfilled and I am. But when things get tough, really tough, that's when I get my continence, that's when I get focused. That's when fear becomes a sentinel, it doesn't become a panic button. It's not an alarm to me. The sentinel comes on and said Dennis, time for you to get get focused, get set, look for solutions, look for things that will benefit, bring your a game to the table when things are at their worst. And sure enough were self isolated.
So our grandchildren and great grandchildren say, oh papa, sorry, you know we don't want to touch with. I said don't worry about it, don't worry about it. Let me ask you this, what are you doing this? You're doing that? Doing a little of this and make sure you do this and we are you know when things are like this, we're at our best and I wrote my best work at my worst time. So I was doing poorly and I wrote the psychology waiting for me, I didn't write it. So people would follow the leader. I wrote the psychology of winning for a person who was losing? Why would I write about winning when I'm losing because I wanted to win. I wasn't winning. I needed to remember what other people who win do. So I wrote it for me and nightingale kona. I just happened to male so many things out and happened to hit at a certain time. I got very lucky and timing laboring under correct knowledge.
And you happened if you're always looking for opportunity, it appears if you're always looking for a bad day or a problem, it appears. Isn't it amazing? Whatever you're expecting and focused on will come into your view because we are all wearing a virtual reality headset and people are waiting for the beautiful program that will take them to a far away land when they put the headset on. But remember when the headset is on, oh my gosh, you say, oh my gosh, I'm nearly falling. That's going so fast. This is so real. You take it off and now it's here. You don't have to wear the headset. You're running your own software program that is looking for what's most important to you. So I'm telling everyone, look, look for desired results. Look for solutions. Look for the opportunity in the crisis because every invention by a man or a woman has been made to solve a problem not to make money.
And then you say, oh, you mean the pet rock and trivial pursuit and all the things that make the big money quick. I said no there's no app there's no app for success. I know you want one. I know you want a 10 step program on how to get rich without doing anything with the multi millionaire mindset that I have for you for $2500. I have the millionaire mindset. You have the 2500, You give me the 2500, I'll give you the millionaire mindset fair enough and people say great that's exactly what I want. And I have a lot of young people saying yeah I know you you want us to dig deep. You want us to have self awareness. You want us to have emotional intelligence, you want us to have empathy but gosh I want to get rich and I said I know but by providing what service that will save people money and time and be good for them they're looking for that answer from you and if you can save them time and money and you can make them healthier and give them more choices.
Money will be your byproduct. So I rattled off all the inventions that were invented by people in a difficult time solving a problem. And the litany goes on I could spend the entire program talking about every invention that came up because of real hardship someone was undergoing not only the telephone and not only you know some of the other things but just an amazing number of things that are invented. So crisis is an opportunity writing on a dangerous wind And that's the two Chinese symbols opportunity writing on the dangerous wind. And so that's what that for me, the crisis I say, oh boy, we're in it. Okay. Time to focus, time to get ready. Time to relax. Take a deep breath now step back. Don't, don't need jerk, don't overreact. Be careful now. Think it out. That's it, slow it down what's important and when you're my age, every day is the best day of your life and Gandhi was right.
I live every day as if it's my last. But I plan and dream as if I'm going to live forever and that's why I can hardly wait. You know, I want the new thing, I want to live to be 100 why? Because I'm so curious as to how things are going to turn out that I'm going to live as long and try to be part of it rather than reflect them what happened before. No. Oh my gosh Dennis, there was so many golden nuggets in what you just said that I can't even recap Oh my gosh, there was so much wisdom in there, wow. Yeah, absolutely. You know, I remember George burns on his hundreds When he turned 100, he signed a 10 year contract entertainment contract right to celebrate. And yeah, he was incredible and boy he really did and bob hope lived to be 100 and you know, and I watched people lived to be 100 and most of them are involved and engaged. And that's another really good, not, not a wisdom from me, it's what I've been watching.
Well, here's what I've learned about neuroscience when you're my age, they tell you to be careful when you walk. So when you're in your late 80s, you look down, you're more careful. They tell you that went out of three people fall and they, and then so you're very careful as you and you begin to hunch over and of course your back and you look smaller. So, but if your brain is taught by you at my age, believe it or not, I've learned that if I walked up straight and if I look straight ahead rather than down, I get my, get my inner ear retrained to keep my balance. But if I reach for the handrail and look down, then I'm dependent on looking down and depending on holding on, I'm very careful. I understand, you know, I use a handrail when I'm going down steep inclines, but I've learned that I can retrain my brain at my age to be on the lookout for things that will keep me younger and I also have been taught that if you were a pretty good golfer and you're retired and you said, oh boy, now I'm just going to do nothing in my golden years and play golf every day won't work.
It'll work for a while. Then you get bored, you get bored, but that's not what you get, you get atrophy because the brain is one of the most amazing parts of your body. If you don't use it, you lose it too. It's called neuro apathy and it's also cook. So if you don't use your brain. So my advice to anyone that's thinking of retiring, use the word re inspire retry or someone on a zoom said, oh Dennis, you're not tired or retired. You're re tread. I said, you mean I'm putting a re tread on the old tire. I said, that's good. I'm re treading rather than retiring, but I'm re inspiring because unless you do something challenging and the coral would teach you that the coral and the barrier reef only lives on the windward side. It's dead in the lagoon. So instead of wanting a utopian lagoon in which you're no longer challenged.
You want the ocean and the windward side of the reef to challenge the coral to be stay alive. So for humans, it means that you must use your brain to get out of your comfort zone to learn something new, then your brain goes to work and it creates new neurons, new neural pathways. And even though sometimes I put my car keys in the refrigerator, give you somebody else did it. It wasn't me and what was my dog's name. I knew it. There it is. I got it. See, I'm not losing my memory. But when I read, when I listened, when I zoom with you, when I learned with somebody younger, my brain starts rewiring and it creates a new neural pathway. And suddenly I have a freeway that was a cul de sac and instead of it having big rocks and surface streets and red lights saying stop, I'm getting some new pathways even at my age which says, Hey, wait a minute, this is a lot more creative and important.
And wow, my creator did a better job than I than I gave them credit for. Right. So that's another thing I wanted to say that no matter what age you are in your career, there's as much opportunity that you can have today, no matter what your age or anything else about you. So we're not stuck in this, shall we say condition that we're in. We have an ability to use it. Amen. That was beautiful, Absolutely beautiful. Yeah. I have a friend Marie, she was a retired librarian and she wanted to write a book based on her life experiences because her husband had passed and she was retired, didn't know what to do. So she ended up going on these adventure trips and, and it ended up taking her around the world and she rode camels in Egypt and she um, did, um, zip lining, you know in Australia and swim with the turtles in the Galapagos islands and it was just truly amazing. And and she wrote a book and it was called um, old librarians don't die.
They jump out of airplanes. All right, I love that. Yeah. And she said, Life doesn't begin until 70. And she says people will come up to her and say, aren't you afraid you're gonna fall and hurt yourself. And she said, I'd rather fall off a mountain than in my bathtub. Well, I'll have to read that kind of book because that really resonates with me. My cousin Jack and England, He's my grandmother's brother's son. He died last week at 108, But at 108 he was zip lining and roller coaster ring. And I really, I criticized him, he got a tattoo. Uh, he wanted to sit Guinness books of record, but he also wanted to raise money for charities. And he went on good morning Britain. Mhm. And he's the oldest person ever been in a sitcom. But so here he walks out on the stage and he's walking and his eyes, his hair, he's full of joy. And they said, Hey Jack, uh congratulations.
And oh, you're on Britain's Got Talent. So what's your Talent? He said to me, talent, I live so long, that's me talent. Here I am. Yeah, I live so long. That's me talent and and he loved his family, he loved everyone. He was full of optimism and I say, oh Jack, I hope on, on your, on my maternal grandmother's side. May I have not only your genes, but may I keep your attitude? Uh, well inside me. So that's really a good thing. And also this idea of personal responsibility is really hitting me heavy right now because I'm I've been watching, you know, remember when you, when you were sitting in the living room, when President Roosevelt said yesterday December seven the day that shall live in infamy. And you were sitting in your living room with your parents and grandparents and Pearl Harbor. And then you were a senior in high school and the korean war broke out and I had to go to the Naval Academy instead of fighting in Korea.
And then I was a carrier based pilot instead of being a writer and a speaker. And I took all that time because I thought we'd always be at war And we went through Polio, you should be in California in 1949 and 1950, We couldn't go swimming in the swimming pool. We couldn't go to a movie and we couldn't take a drink out of a drinking fountain for three straight summers because of polio until my mentor and one of my former bosses, Jonas Saul Invented the first effective polio vaccine in 1955. We were frightened every summer instead of being every fall in every winter instead of worrying about the cold weather, bringing more flu season. We were worried about the summer season, bringing polio and young Children were in iron lungs. They were having trouble breathing, they were dying. They were crippled. We were always afraid. Our parents said, remember don't go to the movie.
And whatever you do, don't get a drink out of the fountain because that's and you couldn't go to swimming pool coat was transmitted that way. So if I used to say that when you're older and you've been through the wars and the shall we say, the cold wars and the bomb shelters with the nuclear possibilities and all the things that you worry about through your life. You realize that you are going to be faced throughout your life with these challenges that will come without any notice. They don't need water in their weeds that don't need watering. They blow into your life unannounced, unexpected, unwanted and they come and you can't concentrate on them, you pull them out but you focus on the flowers and what you've planted and what you're growing because the weeds will be there. But personal responsibility. Sometimes we'll have to have a talk about that. Because a lot of people in my industry use Viktor frankl's book man's search for meaning to develop their why?
Because in his book. And during the holocaust he led the resistance movement and he found that if you have something that you a magnificent obsession. See my family get home stay alive! Justice. The future. He would say to them, the allies are coming in six months, hang in there, he would say yes, memorize the faces, Remember what's going on. So we'll have justice. You must stay alive. But the most important thing is if you took your last piece of bread and this is what resonates with me by me taking responsibility for other people and sharing my wisdom or my thoughts with them. I will live longer by taking responsibility for more people than just me than if I only took care of my selfish me. So if you took your last piece of bread and instead of eating it torrent and a half and gave half of your bread to somebody who needed it more than you did on that day and you only every piece you would live longer than the people who ate all of their bread.
I said doesn't make sense. But yes it does, doesn't it? Because we're accountable to life for giving it purpose and meaning, it's not accountable to us. So we give it the reason and by having a purpose beyond yourself, you live longer. So last thing and I don't want to turn this into, you know, I wanted it to be interact. I don't want to use this as a seminar. But one small thing, you just keep going. I love. It's important thing in my life at this moment is remembering What Victor Frankel said to me in person in 1961 as a student of his At the United States International University in the early 60s here in San Diego, he said I want to build a statue of responsibility. And and I said wow, that's a great idea. Uh he said it could be on Alcatraz right? And at the statue of responsibility was given to us, let's say by another country or by our own people.
And she stood on Alcatraz and she had an eagle in one hand and a baby on the other. And so it reminded me the French gave the statue of liberty in the late 1800s torch bringing the immigrants tablet. What we learn chains at our feet. Ellis Island Battery Park come on into America free to be free to choose, Free to win, free to lose, free to speak what you want, Free to have a different opinion, free to have a controversial opinion, free to say anything you want. But you live with the consequence. So the statue responsibility. She has an eagle in her left hand, she has a baby in her right hand. She is standing on Alcatraz a rusting reminder of lost freedom. Do the choices that are made in a free society that end up giving you the consequence of your choice, which is your just reward for the life that you lived. And so the eagle flies free. As long as we remember to teach our babies the future generation and take care of them on what it took to stay free in the first place, which means for every press, every privilege you want.
You have a duty, you must perform and for everything that you want to be. And do You pay a price for that? Because individual responsibility is the just reward of your own choices. Now, sure enough, Frankel said, it will never be built probably. And I tried to build it in 1979 and the 80s and we were thinking to put it at and of course it won't be on Alcatraz. But Alcatraz would be, it would be beautiful if it was standing on that rock with the old rusted prison, which they were going to make it a tourist attraction or whatever they were going to do. And she was facing out the Golden bridge, Golden Gate bridge, looking at the pacific now of course, and and I'm not being, I made political incidentally, I've learned tim I have learned. I don't push people's hot buttons. I want to push their well, I want to push their hot button. But I want to push their desire button. I don't want to push their fear button. I don't want to push their come back at me because I hate you button.
And because I want to include people rather than be exclusive. I don't talk religion, politics or orientation. I include people's opinions. I give them every right to think the way they do. But I don't use the bully pulpit to get across any political idea. So I end up being an independent. I'm not a republican, I'm not a democrat certainly. And I'm not, you know, I'm not someone who a libertarian, I vote issues and heart and soul and I base it on what I believe in, based upon my all my experience. But I will say this right now. Today, I feel that we're at a tipping point And I've seen tipping points and I've studied history and all I want to say is one thing every 200 years in my historical study, every dynasty, every empire and I can I can rattle them off greek, roman ottoman, Portuguese France, Britain, soviet.
Every society has gone through a situation where at some point more people were depending on somebody else for their future than on themselves. And when that point is reached, when more people want people to give them something rather than empowerment. So if entitlement becomes more important than empowerment and somebody else is the one that gives you what you need, then you have a real problem carrying through This idea of freedom of choice and you end up all the way flip to the other side being dependent again as you were many years ago when you first decided that you wanted to be free to choose. You go full circle about every 200 years and I'm so optimistic that I'm hoping that the people that watch you that listen to you that listen to your mesmerizing, mesmerizing information, the way that you're teaching it, showing it that a light goes on for them.
And they say, you know, if that has happened and if you studied history and you knew that it did rather than no society ever surviving its own success because of that, maybe this could be the first time in history when we decided that it was more important to take personal responsibility individually for our family, for our marriage, for our life, for our health, for our financial security. Because never again will anyone be able to go to work with somebody else, committing and promising them the good life. You have to look in the mirror and say, I get it. I know now that I need to be interdependent but an independent choice maker on what's best for me and my family. Wow. Oh wow! I'm glad you pause every once in a while because as you're speaking, I forget to breathe, I'm just trying to soak in every single word that you're saying who that is powerful stuff.
I mean I haven't, I've never really thought of it in that way. You know how you're combining personal responsibility with history and you know and learning from our past and learning not just from our american past the last couple of 100 years, but learning from you know the history of different societies all the way back, you know to Rome and Egypt and how companies collapse from the inside out, right? And you know, I've studied the greek empire and the roman empire and the Ottoman empire and the soviet union and the british empire. And I've looked at the chinese dynasties and and it just keeps the same thing keeps happening. You go from this, this spiritual awakening that makes you want to be better and you put all the effort and courage into it and you create abundance. When you get the abundance, you begin to say, okay, we're here and you get complacent.
And when you're complacent, it turns to apathy and apathy turns to letting someone else make decisions for you. And lo and behold the next thing that happens is somebody gets in control and you're unable to be able to have a different view. But again, for me it's not political, you know, And so I, you know, I'm trying not to watch the I watch the news only for a need to know for my health and the health of my family and for what we need to do next for a solution. But I don't hang on and knee jerk and get into hysteria because as we started the program out, I need to be at my best right now right. That's why I'm telling when bring your a game, you know, you know, if you're with your Children, this is this is a good time to say the urgent is there. But the important is not urgent. The important ofttimes is put off. So there's another thing people should put on their calendar. It's it's called a red I. R. S. Meeting.
Oh boy. When you put a red I. R. S. Meeting in your calendar, everyone says, well, of course. I mean, what is that an I. R. S. Meeting you say? Yes. They say, oh my gosh. Of course. No wonder you're not working over time. No wonder you're not doing it. Oh, intimate relations schedule. Oh my gosh! You have an intimate relations schedule. So if you were to put on your calendar things that were so important to your family that you ofttimes put off and they had as much weight in your life as an I. R. S. Meeting. I'm telling you I need, you know, we all need to do that. You know why we're so engaged involved and doing what we have to do that. We put off what we want to do and therefore we wait till we're my age and it's just a little late to go skiing From a helicopter at my age, which is what I always wanted to do. Yes, Whitewater rafting, but you don't have to be a little more careful when you're in your 80s and you know, my snowboarding isn't as good.
I need to slalom ski down a ball. So do it now. You know, do the back roads, climb a tree instead of reading magazines climb a tree instead of watching pro athletes play with your Children and grandchildren. I mean engage yourself rather than watching it. You know live in prime time instead of watching in prime time. I love that dentist live in prime time, you know Les Brown says that uh that I don't watch professional athletes living their dreams, you know I'm too busy living mine and I think that's about him, you know, I'm sure that you know it's like me obviously some of the phrases and some of the quotes that I you know Dennis wait these 100 greatest quotes, they were said by somebody else in a different way at some point in history. So we always need to give credit to the origin of our own quotes. But I have a good one. I'm tired of watching other people making money, having fun in their professions and need me to watch them in order to get their ratings and make even more money having fun doing what they love to do in their profession.
Why is it? We would spend our time watching other people enjoying their lives When we should be enjoying our lives in prime time. 6-11 p. m. Now. Think about it, we're helping other people during the day, we're helping people reach their goals were working where a ceo of a little service company servicing other service companies out there and we don't have much time for us, we have time for them and our Children and our families and our responsibilities and our income and what we need to do to push up through the noise. But we only have maybe saturday sunday should be a day of really religion or spirituality or contemplation or family getting together. Saturday is usually chore day. We get the shopping, go to home depot and we do this, oh my gosh, saturday. We need to step back from that because every book I've written has been at night or on a weekend.
I can't write during the day. I need to put bread on the table. So don't wait write your book. Even if it's an e book, right? It don't put it on layaway, you know, do it instead of watching other people whose book is a bestseller, start writing your own book, 70 pages, 80. Just just write it. It's not going to be a Picasso. Don't worry, you're painting a bar, not, not a portrait and you've got another book inside you. Not just one. So don't, don't be a perfectionist perfectionists, procrastinate tell everything is just right and it will never be just right. So just do it, get it all over. You make the mistakes, correct the mistakes, but don't wait because listen to listen to somebody who can't wait anymore. No more green bananas for Dennis Dennis pies. Right, bananas. Well you've got to eat them while they're right, right? That's funny, wow again.
Just one after another after another of really powerful, important life lessons that people need to hear right now. You know, I've been studying beliefs, right, unconscious beliefs. I've created my whole career around 30 years of just studying unconscious beliefs and helping people shift. And I think that it's our beliefs that keep us from applying the wisdom that you're sharing, you know, either have not been taught how to think like an entrepreneur or we have, we don't feel like we're good enough to be able to actually do these things or we don't just don't know how, you know, and people call them success secrets that we have out there, but they're really not secrets. I mean, someone could go to a library or get online and get one of your programs right now and have access to all this wisdom that you're sharing and but they don't because, you know, our country isn't really big on emotional intelligence training, but I think that we're turning where we're at a point in our society that um, people are realizing and it validates everything that you're saying, people are finally realizing that I have to take personal responsibility for my life.
I'm not, I can't wait for somebody else to change it because I'll be waiting forever. And it's time for me to take a stand for me and that means knowing that I'm enough that I deserve, love that I deserve happiness that I don't have to wait for someone else to give me permission to be good or to feel like I'm enough, I can give that to myself and you know, when you do that, it allows you to feel peaceful inside. So you can be others focus so that you can focus not just on your survival, you know, on surviving, but really thriving. And uh, and so that's, I'm just so excited that I can't wait to share everything that you're sharing with me and get it out there because, you know, it's, it's um, You know, the younger generation, you know, I've got a 12 year old and a 16 year old and I really feel like they're going to do some amazing things in the world, their generation because they've been taught that you can accomplish amazing things and that you should take care of one another and that it's important that we, um, you know, I love the phrase for the coronavirus.
You know, um, we're in this together, we're gonna do this together, We're gonna take care of each other together. And I hope that uh, we continue to make that stick because like you said, eventually we'll find vaccines, it will pass and then, but we don't want people to get too comfortable because then they get complacent and like you said, you know, when you're challenged, you know, the harder the wind blows, the, you know, the stronger the tree roots become right. And so I just love everything that you've been talking about. So you've had all kinds of amazing adventures and experiences in your life, just traveling to china and speaking to all those people is extraordinary enough. Um so if you had to pick one particular adventure that you've been on that you would say was in your top five, you know what's one of the coolest things you've ever experienced? Well, the number one would be and people always ask me, so how are you helping the less fortunate mm And I say for the last 25 years I've been digging wells and putting roundabout.
So the little african Children can jump on a merry go round that they push when they're playing and I build a well, they pump water up into a cistern and it makes them drink and here here's what's so exciting. I was riding in a range rover and I was throwing out bottled water to these Children who were dying of thirst. And so every weeks child was dying because they didn't have any possible water. And the driver said don't do that, they will die anyway. So that brick that brings you back to the star thrower where the star thorough was throwing starfish back out and they said don't do that. And you say well this one will live because it's going to go out on the outgoing tide. So you're saving one starfish and I said well yeah, yeah, I know, but the child, I just say the bottom one, uh if he lives for another week. Uh and the water I gave, because I said I gave three bottles, they said, oh my gosh, three bottles, I mean, so I gave three bottles and I said, wait a minute, that that's only a token, isn't it?
So the number one trip that I've taken all my Children grandchildren every year is a safari pilgrimage to the middle of africa. So now I not only see the circle of life and how it all works and how all the animals work together, but I'm working with some of the tribes there, that if they don't grow food and they don't like to grow food because there was a masai and so they're used to wandering and traveling on God's earth that people came over and put fences around and said it was theirs and they always thought it belonged to the animals and the people in God. So what I'm trying to do is trying to dig some wells and and the pregnant women in this one area, they put them on wheel barrels when they're in labor and they run down this this one mile path to try to get somebody to help them bear the child. And I'm saying now this for me is what I can do in my own small way because I not only want to tell my Children and grandchildren help them, but I'd like to use the money that I've made and the time that we have to help people who are really in trouble, meaning they may not make it for a month and I'm doing that and that gives me more satisfaction.
But I would say that the adventure of East africa Yeah, I go to Malawi and I go to Rwanda and I go to you know, kenya and I go to Uganda, the health centers there and that's all good. But I like to go where I can slosh paint on an orphanage or I can see the woman being pushed in the will bear it to the maternity and I want to either put a solar, I want to do something with the money that I made in the time that I have. It makes me feel like I'm making a small difference and what it's done for my family has made them really feel see the big picture And that 90% of the people on the earth are trying to eat for the night. So they're not into what we're doing here trying to, shall we say get a piece of of the good life or just necessarily grab the american dream. They're just trying to make it through the night and the day and I'm trying to help those people make it. So they see for themselves possibly the education possibility because they can't they don't have the right land, they don't have the right, they don't have the right geographic area.
So they're not losers. They're not destined to be losers. They're just caught in a situation where externals our guiding them right now. If I can help them with the externals maybe the internals that you and I are trying to teach of digging deep inside of having that opportunity to be educated that makes it a difference. So I would say that a safari of life without killing animals and without photographing animals without taking selfies of me with the animals but turning my camera out rather than inward so that I can take the picture of life and be part of that is more important to me than a selfie. Mm. Yeah. And you made me think of one more comment Now my grandchildren have come up to me and some of them live in L. A. And they said papa guess what the way that you date now is. And I said well I'm sure it has something to do with social media and they said the number of people whose physique has the most hits and has the most thumbs up and likes.
So they based their availability and their self esteem on the number of followers they have on their smartphone and be very careful with that because technology is the enemy of intimacy. It gives you access to everything in the world. But it makes it too easy to think that because you have following You have 200 1000 people on your follower group that you suddenly have arrived in life. It's not a numbers game and it's not a virtual game. It's not based on how you look to people and they like you and therefore that you could be dating them. You're going to have an individual conversation face to face with the person that you're going to spend your life with and you need to have that being there with them rather than haven't all be virtual. So that's another thing I'm watching that and saying okay that's a new trend that I understand it because it's access but don't base your worth on the number of hits you have because if you don't have as many hits as other people that might make you disappointed that you're not as important, powerful or rich as somebody who's utilizing that more.
Yeah that's exactly right. That's just the next generations way of disempowering themselves here you decide whether I'm worthy or not based on a click of a button. That's better. That's really well said him and I hope you keep on that by you know I'm marvel at it. So what I'm not I'm not a older critic of technology let's face it being able to have the libraries of the world in front of you. Oh my what incredible opportunity to be educated and not have somebody else brainwash you because then you can have access to this and you yourself can get firsthand secondhand and you can find out what the sources. So it's marvelous. But please don't let it rule your life by making you feel that the number of hits you have makes you better than somebody. It really doesn't. Mm. Yeah. Yeah. We are. You know, it's just a new fancy way of doing the same things that we always do.
And so, but that's okay. We're going to help more and more people were going to use the same technology to get these messages to them so that they recognize, um, that they're in charge of their level of, of self worth. So you've met so many amazing people over the years. And um, so who would you say, uh, is one of the coolest people you ever met? Well, there's some really good ones on, uh, you know, it's hard question for you. I'm sure give you maybe three. Uh, okay, walter Payton, walter Payton was running up the hill every summer in, in, in army boots. And he would challenge every wide receiver in the NFL to run up the hill, that hill that he ran up over and over and over again. And when I met him, I said, is that what you do in the off season? He said, Yeah, it's kind of fun because it's challenging in a way. We don't do it for money or anything. And he said, but during football season when they gave me the ball late in the game, gave me a little more stamina and I didn't get as tired and I was able to keep going.
So the discipline of doing that. I said no, that's cool. I didn't know that. He said, yeah, doesn't everyone need to do that for the, I said yes, it's true. Everyone does. But we just don't realize it. Then I met and moral Lindbergh, the widow of Charles Lindbergh who was the most famous american during a certain point in time because it was flight across the atlantic and their son was kidnapped and killed and yet the ransom was being asked and Charles Lindbergh went to Maui and so they opted out. But, and moral Lindbergh, his widow went on to write one of the greatest books I've ever read. And when I interviewed her, uh, it's called gifts of the Sea and she likened life to sea shells. So it's like a chick flick book, gifts of the sea by a woman. And I loved it. I loved it so much that I did an audio of it and the people who were blind said Dennis, that was the best book we've ever heard.
Uh, wow wow. I was just, I just narrated her book from, from memory. So she would be cool. But Billy Graham was cool. I'll tell you why he and I became good friends and I was the warm up act for him sometimes just because I wrote seeds of greatness and it was published by a christian publisher and everyone thought that I was maybe evangelistic or Pentecostal or and they didn't realize how inclusive I am of all religion. But Billy Graham said, so how many lives have you changed? And I said one uh mine, he's me too. I said, no, no, no, no dr Brown, 3000 people waiting to hear you. And they come from the outfield to the infield and they pray in all of their heart and soul for what you're saying. He said, I believe in every word in this book. You know that Dennis every word in this book. I believe that's true, that's me. He said, you're on your journey. But he said the journey is catching you because you're doing it all over the world and and you just told me Dennis come and live with you and you'll see how religious you are when you're living with Dennis as opposed to what Dennis says.
And I said, but dr Graham, you actually change lives. He said, no, I don't. I'm an awareness mechanism. He said they come from the outfield to the in field, they have a religious experience for this moment. We pray together. I give them literature and they go home Dennis and they go back to being themselves unless they themselves have taken the responsibility to make the commitment to begin to make the changes that would make them live the kind of life that they've just said that they're dedicated to. So he said, I'm an awareness giver, I plant seeds like you do, some of them take most of them don't, but that doesn't prevent me from doing it. I said that is really cool. And he said by the way, what denomination are you now that you've been this and you've been that you were Episcopalian, you're in the navy, you did this, you roman catholic, this and all of that. What I said, I was hoping you might give me a suggestion. You said you're you're on the path, you're on the way and you're still on your journey.
And he said, God bless you, you just keep including including make your room bigger and bigger for other people's ideas. But remember your belief is based on your core values and you're including people so that you don't become a narrow minded prejudice bigot of any kind. I said now that resonates with me because I want to make room for people. I don't want to keep them out because they don't believe the way I do. And he said live that way and your creator will be ever grateful that you've got the message after all. That is just so, so, so good. Oh my gosh Dennis, that's so good. Oh wow, wow! So and such a needed message. You know, I I was talking with Mark Sanborn um yesterday and uh you know, he does a lot with leadership and I was talking about one of the problems with our political system. If we went into a company, we would do team building, we would have one team, right?
We want to divide everybody into, into different departments. We want to create all these silos. We would come together as one organization. And uh, and the problem with a lot of our politics or even religion is that we silo ourselves democrat or republican right as opposed to being inclusive where americans and bigger than that citizens of earth and we need to, I love how the, um, the imagery that you painted about, you know, expanding your, your home and your room and allowing more people in and you don't have to agree with them, but you can still love them, right? And you can still appreciate them and you can still respect where they might be coming from and in doing that, um, there will be more open to what you have to say as well, um, where most people that, you know, they're not seeking to understand and then be understood, they're just becoming trial or lawyers and trying to prove why they're right. And uh, and it shuts down communication, it really does tim, you know, and you really do capsulize it extremely well.
So it makes me really proud that the little boy that used to listen to Earl Nightingale and you know, the other things who grow up to be, who you are, really gives me courage, that uh, there are enough voices in order for the voices to be heard. So the changes can be made and that's why I will always look for the solution. And you know, I believe in protest because if that's the way that you believe changes made, go for it. But I also understand that there are some of us who believe that being a role model is also a good way to get the message out because I have very few people that I influence, but my Children, my grandchildren, my great grandchildren and everyone I meet. So the gardener, my gardener is a horticulturist. My Uber driver is a transportation executive. The server in my restaurant is a food service executive.
And so I treat everyone on an equal plane. They're as good as me, not better than me, not worse than me, they're as good as the best, but no better than the rest and it will just keep our ego in check. Remember ego is a funny thing if you think you're better than someone is because you want to have power over them and so you're trying to keep the people underneath you make sure they don't get the power because if they do, they'll over throw you so you have to be careful and so what you want to do is make sure that people are empowered to believe in the dream that we're all talking about. But so I try not to be political and it's very difficult right now because we're definitely uh polarized and we are polarized and it's not possible sometimes to debate anything on a meaningful issue basis. I hope we don't lose that. I hope at one point will reach a meritocracy where each according to his own miniature personal contribution.
I do the best I can. I'm a good transportation executive. That's, that's what Colin Powell said. He said be the best street sweeper you can be. And so and so you know, I'm the best street sweeper that I can be. So I build a pond, I'm good doing the dumpster now I'm writing Children's books, I'm doing virtual webinars, I'm doing whatever I can do. But I'm living every day of my life by giving the most I can to it. If you give more in value than you expect to receive in payment, you'll be practicing the law of increase and customer service and repeat business is based on the belief that what you gave them was not for your benefit, but was for their benefit in your own heart. And I will always believe that and that's why I don't sell stuff like everybody else doesn't and now I know the only way to get heard is to be noticed. I know that and I know that you have to position yourself and I know you need somebody saying when the meeting is going to take place and how much it is.
I know that, but I don't do that. I'm I'm just a humble high school teacher Who's a oboe player in the 15th row of the Maestro's orchestra. So, but I do believe that people with the most value can afford to be humble because then they don't have to compare themselves with others. They can just look for excellence and for things that they can do, they won't be comparative in nature and they won't worry about how many points they have to score or how rich they are or what kind of car they drive. I think that I think they're trying to show people how far you've come is not as important as believing that you still have more to come. Yeah, yeah, I love that. It's such a powerful message because so many people, especially the people that I'm coaching these days are, you know, achievers, they are entrepreneurs, they are always trying to create more and more and more and and then end up finding themselves, even if they do achieve a level of success that they strive for that, it wasn't uh it wasn't what they expected or it's never enough or they thought that if they achieve this level of success, they have all this free time and close relationships and and actually they had to sacrifice all of that to try to, you know, achieve these financial gains.
So it's a re evaluation and I think the time in our life that we're in right now is an opportunity for people, you know all over the world to have a re evaluation and uh and shift out of our ego. Um you had said something and it reminded me of an acronym for ego. Um it stood for edging God out. I like that and I promise I will give you credit for that because because the word tip means to ensure performance. So so think about it. Would you just tip after a meal even if you got just regular service? Yeah, we tip 15-17.5%. Nowadays Americans tip about 20% were the best tempers in the world. Except that tip isn't meant to be that way you're supposed to tip people on how they should bet on themselves and what they should expect. What kind of stock to buy, What kind of horses fast, what kind of so you tip people which means to ensure performance and the higher the expectation you have, the higher the compliment that you pay, the more that you give them, the autonomy, the more that they will increase their performance.
And so don't waste too much time with recognition after they do things be generous with your expectation and with hoping that give them as you're walking around the encouragement because that tip will be as important as the one you give them in recognition after. I love that to ensure performance. That's great. Yeah, I like to tip people before the meal, you know because they live up or down to your expectations, they will, I did that, I did that. But unfortunately the shift changed and then the next, could I have that tip now please? Was meant I said, but if you give us legendary service like I know you will and I expected that. So here's your tip because I know what a great experience I'm going to have. That's right anyway. You know, tim I could go on with you it, but I could listen to so I could use these two big ears instead of this one mouth because I need to always remember when you talk, you learn nothing when you listen and ask questions, you learn everything and the more you learn and the more you're open and the less you talk, the more wise you become and I'm learning that method rather than my preaching, lecturing self, I'm learning to say but let me ask you this, what's your opinion when I shut up.
It's really hard because I want to wait for them to stop talking so that I can be to the point again. But I'm learning to say, well wait a minute now I didn't so you're saying edge edging God out ego. I I like that because gosh, I knew that there is a reason why people's ego, not only edges got out, but it also cuts everyone's down to a smaller size. So if you treat people less than yourself, you'll be built a company of mental dorms and when I say dwarf, I mean meant just mentally, I don't mean physically right, but if you treat people and elevate them so that you're hiring and developing people with skills greater than you, you'll build a company of giants. And so that's that's the way you and I need to work. And like I say, I could be with you on this program forever, but I want to tell you how much I appreciate sharing with you and I'm glad you got a few words in edgewise anyway.
Oh, I loved it. I already know what I would say, I wanted to hear what you had to say and I loved it so much. This has been Dennis, this has been extraordinary. So um oh my goodness! So you have, I mean of course you have some extraordinary programs. You know, one of my favorite of course is the psychology of winning. And then you have your book the winning for life. And then you also said that you have this new um program that you release for free um called Triumph over turbulence and everybody can find that at Dennis Dennis with one N D E N I S lately dot com. Right? And they'll be surprised. So they'll scroll down, keeping looking for the pitch and the pitch is never there. So if they just click on, learn more, they go right to the waiting for life community where it's free and they'll say there's got to be a catch in here somewhere and there isn't because unless I interact with people in social media, whether it's on facebook or linkedin, unless I give them value and share with them and find out what they want, then I'm trying to sell them something in a funnel that is getting them from a free to a low funnel and then a mid funnel and then the big funnel, which is a big pitch at the end and it's called escalating commitments based on minimum initial commitment and that's what everyone is doing today.
And I understand it because it's a marketing way of doing business, but then there's the old guard like me, social media, yes, getting more people involved, Yes, but I want to at least find out what they want and get to know him a lot better and ask them a lot of questions before I start saying, here's your answer. So that master class is free and there's no buy in afterwards. So I hope people will take advantage of it because some of the best things that I think I've been able to put across and and I really believe in the fact that the age that I am give me what advantages I've pretty much seen it all and I've heard it all and I've watched it all and yet all that makes me is more optimistic that people like you tim and and my my peers have that voice may seem like a drop in the ocean. But remember the rings go out and we have no idea we have no idea the impact that we have on other people.
Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen dr Dennis wheatley Dennis, Thank you so much. It's been a true honor and pleasure. I just loved every minute of it. Thanks for being on today and thanks for being so generous with your time and your questions and and listeners and I just wish you only the best and keep doing it. But you make my heart full because it gives me, it does give me courage. So instead of being a cynic saying the next generation, they're going to be socialist. We're gonna have a socialist, neo Marxist world and neo Marxist nation and I'm not going to stand for it. I'm saying, okay, okay. You know, we need jerk, we get hysterical, we overdo it, we over we overreact and and the virus is real. I'm concerned. I'm vulnerable. I know what to do. Believe me. I do know that I don't want to put me on a ventilator because I don't want to have the overreaction of my immune system and so I do know what to take if I do get the virus before I'm hospitalist to give me the best possible outcome.
And yes, I'm using all the hygiene and yes, I wear a mask and I do, I do what I'm doing. But I also am very cool and calm and bringing my a game to the table. This is the time when I have to be at my best because remember the psychology of winning was written by a loser who was trying to be a winner and I was at a crossroads in my life. So that's you know, that's very important to know. And I hope we communicate again tim Yes, Yes. I'm just it's so exciting. You know, when you say the psychology of winning was written by a loser who became one of the greatest winners of all time. It's just a powerful story. Thank you. Thank you very much. And God bless everybody. Uh Yes, thank you very much. All right, everybody, you heard it from the great legendary Dennis wheatley. Oh my gosh! Right, so here's a couple of things. You gotta do. One go to his website and check out his program triumph over turbulence.
Because you know, if you loved the interview as much as I did, you're going to want to be a part of that and soak in as much knowledge and wisdom as possible. And then grab a couple of his books as well. And if you have never heard the psychology of winning, do yourself a favor and get that program and listen to it. Make sure you share this with your friends because everybody needs the message that Dennis shared with us these days, apply what you've learned and make today mesmerizing and we'll see you next time. Bye everybody. Bye! Thanks to him. I have a great rest of the day and a great week. Hey, would you like more free tips on how to be a mesmerizing leader? Then check out mesmerizing leadership dot com and also hang out with me on facebook facebook dot com forward slash tim. Sure. Thanks so much and make your day a sure success. Hey, it's tim Sherwood. You like to learn my best secrets for how to be mesmerizing. Then head over to www dot surviving to thriving dot me. That's www dot surviving to thriving dot me. I'll see you there.