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Ep88 Trust Yourself and Burn the Boats!

by Jacqui Brauman
December 15th 2021

In the last interview style episode for 2021, Ush and Jacqui have their pets making lots of noise! But they persist with the great conversation about trust, self-confidence, resilience, transition ... More

Mhm Welcome to the I. Q. Meets EQ podcast. I'm Jackie bremen principal solicitor at T. B. A. Law and ceo of legally wise women and I'm here with Bush stanic former corporate lawyer, then head of HR and now an emotional intelligence coach. Good morning Wish morning, Jackie, how are you going? Good, good thanks. You know, december energy. It's all very fast and light and frantic. It is, it's like a big snowball to the finish, isn't it? Voting down the hill and you were just saying you're not giving yourself much time off over christmas? No, like I was saying a couple of podcasts ago, I sort of do my planning in september and sort of keep it quite full until the end of the year and then I normally have the week of christmas off, but I got a new client yesterday, which is great and a really, really good client that I wanted to work with so I won't be in, but I'll be doing a bit of prep and bits and pieces and things like that over christmas because it's quiet so I will have downtime.

But just I'll be working in my pajamas pajamas. The level of intensity is a little less. But exactly what about you? Yeah, we always closed for two weeks over christmas because it's the only time that you can really actually stop watching your emails because even if I have a week off here or there, I'm always just in there flicking bits and pieces around and someone's asking me something. So it's an actual real time off and I'm really looking forward to it. Nice. Yeah, you deserve it after the year that everyone's had a new in particular as well. It's going to be so nice to you. Just have that time off. I mean, well we'll talk again next week about the year in review because on reflection, I feel like I'm in a great space for the start of next year already. Like I don't feel like I'm looking forward to a break, but I don't feel flat, you know, good. I know what you mean. Yeah, we'll talk about that again. I was the same feeling the same yesterday actually going on sort of a bit before the end of the year is even over.

I felt really good to start next year with some really good things lined up. And I had a planning session yesterday as well with a friend of mine who's helping me with getting into Dubai. So that, that was on the vision board this year, is to open up a Dubai sort of branch clients that's all coming along to you. So yeah, you're very international. That's the goal. That was that was the plan this year. Set up the online and get into a couple of international locations, wow, you're pretty much set for it. That's for sure. Yes. Bring on 2022, have you got a puppy there that's running around doing something not running. She's cuddly snoopy is getting so big. He's so cute, send me a couple of photos so we can put them in the show notes. I will. We love our cats. Part of our podcast rate. That's right in the mornings, you can't escape because we've got marshy because we've had marshy on on and off for about a year before.

Remember when, when he was little, the scratchy, you could hear him in the background. Yeah. And quite often then he would also start screening. Pretty much. Yeah. But don't worry everyone we cut that bit out. Yeah. And mine are running around somewhere. We've already had our walk this morning. Oh my God. Already you're such as well. I need to fit it in. You know, I can't quite fit it in between finishing talking with you and then having to get ready for work. So it has to be before. Yeah, I know all the things we have to do in the mornings to get ourselves out the door. Have you done your vedic meditation course yet? It's on the next weekend. Very exciting, thursday, friday, saturday, sunday, it's two hours a day. So thursday friday evening and saturday sunday morning. So that would be great to start that and have that all sort of ready as a skill for the new year as well. Very good. Exactly. I'm so glad that it all opened up before the end of the year to do that because Again, that was on our list, wasn't it?

To do the course before, before December. So yeah, can't wait. Looking forward to that then? It's 40 days, isn't it? You did it straight. Yeah, I think they tried to aim for 60. I can't remember now because I am doing it every day, just not necessarily twice every day. That's great. Mhm. I really enjoy it. So it's not a it's not a task, it's just a matter of finding the time for the second one. But next year I've done my planning for next year as well and I've actually die arised it in every weekday for the second one, so no one is allowed to move that out of my calendar. Yes. Alright, let's have a listen to the interview. Then I interviewed Janine Howard. She's done lots of things, but most notably has run her own magazines, in particular, profile magazine, but she sold that now. She does a lot of business coaching, particularly for female entrepreneurs, but her style is all around lifestyle because she has managed to retire her husband and really set her business up for lifestyle and home schools and all those sorts of things.

So yeah, let's have a listen. Good afternoon Janine, Welcome to the podcast. How are you? I'm fantastic and thanks for having me on Jackie. I'm so pleased because like I was saying, like we talk nearly every week and yet, I don't know a lot of this stuff about you. So I'm really excited to jump in deeper when you were little, What did you want to be when you were growing up. And where did you grow up as well? Yeah. Okay. So, I grew up in Melbourne. In fact, I grew up in the base of the dandy in all ranges. So little kid from Montrose. And when, when I was a little kid, I distinctly remember getting given a little nurse kit, so little doctor and nurse kitten, I was obsessed that I wanted to become a nurse. And so all through my childhood it was like, yes, I want to be a nurse and helping people, obviously was was the key behind that, when it got time for me to graduate high school and move into university, which is clearly the path that everybody does at that time, it's just ingrained in us that that's what we do.

I really had this moment of going, well, I kind of, I don't really know, I'm so young still, I don't know. So pick anything or pick anything. So, I picked being a teacher. Really? I loved school. And so therefore I thought, well, let's just stay in school. I didn't do primary school, actually did high school. So I became well studied to become a high school teacher. But you've been on a very different path to that. Yes, and no. So here's the interesting bit. So when I was in university, we came to the third year of university and you do a lot of in school practice now, I was so a little scaredy cat even back in those days, I'm not anymore and a little scary cat and I actually went and applied to my old high school to do my teacher training there. So I thought it's familiar, it's going to be great. So I ended up hanging out with all of the teachers that I had as a kid because you know, I was a straight a student, you know, good girl, all of that thing. So that was great.

But once I started to get into my practice work of teaching kids, I was absolutely gobsmacked that they didn't want to learn, they didn't want to do their homework, they found it boring. Whereas I have been that student, I ate it up. I thought everyone was like me, it was a real slap in the face that the the vision that I had of teaching kids about the, I wanted to be a biologist, a biology and environmental studies teacher. So that vision I had of changing the world through the, you know, the next generation was firmly squashed because of their lack of engagement and enthusiasm. And I found a lot of what I was doing was actually behavioral management. So I actually dropped out of my teaching course and had the last year of my university of just studying because I loved studying. So I ended up coming out of university with a bachelor biological science majoring in Biology, environmental studies and Geography, wow, achieving much yeah.

And just a lover of learning through all things. Yes, yes and again thinking that everyone else was like me. So then I had this real dilemma of going, well I've come out of university with not really a degree in anything in particular, so I couldn't go teaching high schools. I knew that I still wanted to have that element of helping people, you know, back in the day when I was a little girl with that nurse's kit and so I ended up falling into tourism. So you remember back in the day and I'm sure it's still there, the Philip island penguin parade. Right? So I went and worked there. So I worked there on my school holidays, taking you know families and doing Rockfall rambles and talking about penguins and seals and all of the things and I found that I absolutely loved it. It was my jam. So next thing you know, I found myself working at victoria's Open range Zoo which was in those days was called the zoo, right?

Driving the trucks around and doing all that thing and wearing safari and I literally found myself for the next decade or a bit more wearing safari outfits. So instead of teaching in a classroom I actually found that I was my, my gift was teaching in the environment. So whether it be in the Daintree rainforest because I moved to Port Douglas. I worked for a wildlife sanctuary up in Port Douglas for many, many years. I even lived on Heron island and was the activities and guest relations manager there over there. I went back to the Daintree National Parks. Actually spent a lot of time literally imparting not just knowledge about the environment but really, you know, fun stories and engaging stories. So then I went to the point that I actually wrote a white paper on the value of interpretive tourism to the everyday person and the change that we can actually make.

So that really became my passion. I was able to marry my passion for wildlife with teaching literally out the environment, wow, there's so much in all that and it so is your passion to teach something that you're passionate about and to see the change is the biggest thing isn't it there? Because if you were plunked down to teach something that you weren't so passionate about and as you said like the engagement and the learning of the passion wasn't reflected, but you can almost see particularly with tourism that you could almost instill some kind of love or change in what you're teaching in the person that's seeing it as well, pretty special, very special. And you know, I found even an hour with a family taking them through a wildlife sanctuary by the end of that our tour, they change perceptions about what they were going to do when they got home and have more respect and care for the environment.

So yeah, look, it was pretty powerful, you know, all working in my safari little outfit and the little scaredy cat that you were really had no trouble then sort of talking and teaching and being in front of a group and all those sorts of things. And the difference was too, I found when I was teaching in a high school, I was a nervous wreck because I felt like I was about the same age as them and really, you know, who was I to teach them this stuff. Whereas once I got out into the environment, I knew my stuff. I was so passionate about it that I was learning all of the time and lifelong learner. So it really suited all of my values. It suited my style and I really found being a tour guide. I actually became who I am today, Jackie and you know me quite well, I'm very confident, I'm very outspoken and well spoken and I've spoken on stages across the world in front of hundreds if not thousands of people and it's because I had the passion and so when you've got the passion and the knowledge combination and the seeing change in people, you actually become really unstoppable.

That's a bit exciting. So when you were at court Douglas in the Daintree, when you started actually going into management as well. Yes, so here's the thing to a quick little interesting story. I was the, what we call the head guide or guide coordinator of the wildlife century I worked for. So not only was I taking people on tours, I was managing all of the team and it's something that I kind of did naturally and I was teaching them as well. So that was great. However, with the wildlife sanctuary, they actually lost their salesperson. So they had a particular woman who promoted the sanctuary and did all of the pr and everything and they couldn't find anyone to replace her. And so I remember my boss said to me, hey, you like to talk, why don't you give sales ago? And I was like fine, let's let's give it a go next. You know, I found my next level forte and that was really, it comes down to my love of talking to people and so I actually became the spokesperson of the Wildlife century.

I did all of our promotional videos. I hosted all of the tv shows from great outdoors and Get away and all of those things and you know, we're with the co host and all of that. And yeah, I loved it. I traveled all over Australia promoting the wildlife sanctuaries. So then I was like combination of wildlife and sales amazing. And then I still have my safari outfit. But then I wear like your little cute high heels that we'd go with it and a little skirt, make it more more feminine, very cute. Is there any of that old footage from getaway or the great outdoors on youtube somewhere. Oh my God, probably see it was back in the day before social media or anything like that. So yeah, if you're Googling it, I'm sure I'll be with David Rain or with Katrina Roundtree. Yes, I met all that crew during my time there. Eric friday. Well what's fun? So that certainly added a whole level of other skills for you And as you said before social media.

So they would have been bigger productions with all the cameras and the lights and all the people and wow the works and you know, it was a really exciting time. I got to to really see behind the scenes on how tv shows were made. You know, I got into video production as well and created all of our tv commercials. So I started moving from just sails into the marketing side as well. Yeah. And managing team. Yeah. And so you know how it's, if you're good at one thing, people start merging you and go, well, if you're good over there, you'll be good over here. And so over the years I started to get more into the management of the actual wildlife century as well. So you know, we had a team of 50 to 60 staff that I would help manage and yeah and then it gets a little bit more political and not so fun and yeah, so I ended up coming to my end of my time having worked there for many, many, many years and kind of going as far as I possibly could.

And then interestingly, because I was in the marketing side as well, the people who I was placing advertising in particular magazine actually asked me to go and work for them. And I distinctly remember there were a husband and wife, couple, gorgeous people and he actually said to me, why don't you come and dress like a lady for once and come and work in a magazine was like, well hang on a second, hang on, like my safari. So I ended up going and working at a magazine. Now people often say to me, how did you go from working in tourism to a magazine. But it was actually a natural progression because I had gone into sales and I got into marketing. So then selling advertising in a magazine with lots of parties and champagne and lunches and all of that. It was fun. It was so good and I was absolutely, really bloody awesome at it. There you go, That's great, What sort of magazine was it? What are they doing? It wasn't fashion or anything was it? It was, no, so it was the original publication and there was a lot of stories on this is in Cairns, a lot of stories on regional people and businesses and of course some fashion and that kind of thing as well.

So it's really where I found other skills, so for me, those other skills were coordinating the entire magazine. So I ended up being the publication manager. I think it's because I'm a Virgo, I'm very good at time, management does have to run all of the magazine, run, the staff, run the advertising, you know, do all of it to the point where we actually end up having three magazines, so we expanded from Cairns into Townsville and also into McKay, so we had three publications going at once and that then caught the eyes of a larger media company. And because by that stage I was running all of those magazines myself, the company who purchased the magazines actually kept me on as part of the agreement. So yeah, I really found, yeah, all of these other skills that I never would have thought that it would have had coming from being a high school teacher. Yeah. So much of a journey from there, that's for sure. And just sort of building and building like on the skills you already had and on your natural strengths as well.

That's pretty amazing. And when then, did you run your own magazine? Because you ended up in business for yourself running a magazine too, didn't you? Going back to the story where the media company bought the magazines I was working for and they contracted me, I think it's 12 months that I need to be contracted to hand the business over and teach them the ropes and all of that, which was their biggest mistake because I ended up being moved from Cairns to the Sunshine Coast and worked out of the office here. Honestly, I was kicking and screaming. I was like, no, I don't want to go, I love where I live, we're very ingrained in the theater culture up there. My husband is an actor and I did a lot of acting and stage work back in that day to a whole other story. And so anyway, I came down to the Sunshine Coast and worked here And I was put in charge of 13 titles. So it's a whole new magazine division and under resourced underpaid and all of the things, A little bit of a boy's club, In fact a large boys club and six months to the day I walked into the office and I just knew I was never going to come back.

So by lunchtime I got up and I literally walked out of the building and never, ever went back the next day. I started my own magazine, wow, wow, How much have you prepared in your head for that? Oh, none, none. I just knew that I could do it better. Yes. And couldn't tolerate what you were going to do for someone else anymore. Yeah, that's right. I was, you know, I'm the kind of person if I find myself complaining about things, I don't want to be a complainer, I want to find solutions and so I worked hard to really find some solutions and I remember it was like trying to turn the titanic, you know, it was a company that spent over many, many years and they weren't really into magazines, it was a newspaper company and they did that well, but magazines was a whole different kill of fish. So I decided, well stop complaining and do something about it.

So Winston where so there you go, create your own magazine and eat into their market share. An interesting story was after I had started my magazine, Male boss from the newspaper, saw me on the street delivering my magazines and he came up to me and he said, oh yeah, good work, I'll give you three months, that's your challenge. And I went, okay. Mr That magazine was going for 11 years, wow, that's pretty amazing. Yeah. You ever see that old boss again and just sort of rub it in a little bit more. Yeah, I did see him and he didn't have much to say that's the best, the best revenge isn't it? Oh my God, and you know, for me it wasn't necessarily about proving the boys wrong or anything like that. For me it was Realization of how powerful and how capable we are when we actually back ourselves when we trust ourselves and that's what really, you know, I've been an entrepreneur since what's that end of 2007.

right, literally made all my own money created my businesses. I've had three magazines in that time. I've had a national Newsstand magazine that I had for quite some time, which was a parenting magazine, you know, and I've created my coaching business and all of the things and it's because I literally jumped off that cliff one day by walking out that door with no plan and just trusting myself then everything is literally worked out since then and you seem to have continued to give yourself no out either. Like this is what you've decided to do. There's no turning back and there's never been a point where you've allowed yourself to to not succeed. Yeah. And for some people that could be really super scary as Tony Robbins would say that's burning the boats, I burned the boats a long time ago, you know, to the point where I don't know if anyone would ever employ me because I question everything like you sure we should do it that way, isn't there an easier better way?

You know? So you know, I'm like a rebel also seemed to have burned the scaredy cat a little bit too. Yeah, she, she got taking care of a very long time ago and more so when I actually went out on my own, you know, there is challenges though. So you know anyone who for yourself who runs their own businesses and has team and all of the things, there are moments where you get to and you're like how how am I going to do this? And I remember my where fast forward. I had sold that magazine that I first started, so sold that when my first child was born and I said to my husband, we're now free, so what do you want to do? Like if you could do anything, what would you like to do? And he said, I'd love to be an actor full time. So he has been in theater for years and he actually studied operatic voice at university and so I said, great, well what do we need to do for you to be an actor?

And his agent said, well we need to move to Melbourne or Sydney. So we actually decided to move to Melbourne from the Sunshine Coast of course, then I'm like, well I don't have a business, how we're going to pay the bills, all of the things. And I had some cash obviously from the magazine sale, which got us through for a while, but then it was like, okay, I now need to recreate myself and I need to create a business that could allow me to be a mother. So I didn't want to work much, I didn't want to work time for money. I soon found myself pregnant with my second baby. So that's when I started my coaching business and like anything, I made it work and I made it, I didn't know what I was doing and I worked it out and within the first year I had a six figure business and you know then upwards from there and that was nearly eight years ago. And also I guess moving to Melbourne, you left behind a lot of your networks to so it was pretty much starting from scratch new business, new networks I guess online because you didn't want to be trading time for money.

Yeah, Yeah, absolutely. And so you know, here I am, we found ourselves in Melbourne, I've got two babies husband being an actor, I'm in charge of all of the bills. And so we had two properties in Queensland. So I've got mortgages for that rent in Melbourne was as much as the two mortgages in Queensland. Thanks Melbourne, even though I was earning great money, like it never seemed enough. And so I was starting to go into full hustle mode, like I was doing whatever it took to get enough money in the door to pay the bills. And remember years ago Naomi Campbell the model, The supermodel, she used to say she didn't get out of bed for less than $5,000, right? And I would say the same thing, I'm like I need $5,000 a day, it wasn't quite that much. But you know it felt like that that every day I had to go and make money make money make money make money and I did actually find myself going in a very quick spiral down And so you know, there was that one point where I was like I can't do this anymore.

I just have to stop but I couldn't stop because I burned the boats right. And that moment for me when I came up on the other side, I just decided I would never ever be in that position again. I would never be in a position where I go to the grocery store and I'm not sure if I've got enough money to pay the grocery or when you have to put the honey back Because Honey is you know like $1 million dollars apparently decided then I would never ever go back to that spot and I never have, I, you know, done what it takes to build my business the point that it is robust and there's a kitty and you know, we've got enough money all of the time and you know, we've moved back to Sunshine Coast a few years ago and we've been renovating the house. I've single handedly been paying for it in cash, haven't taken out a loan, I literally pay for it in cash.

My husband's a builder so he can actually do the work, which is fantastic. You know, and we get to choose. Like we've consciously chosen everything about our lives to have it as free and simple as possible and honestly money does help really does. And I've made sure that we are financially free so that we have all of that choice we home school the kids, we when we can travel as much as we can, you know, retired my husband, he doesn't have to work, you know, we can buy the things if we want. You know, we bought a caravan and then I decided, well I'm going to take advantage of this Covid market, sold it for nearly double knowing that I've got enough cash to go buy another one if I wanted to. So, you know, it's been a really interesting life to be honest, Jackie, in following my gut and learning to trust, really, really trust myself. And that trust has got me to this point now that no matter what happens, no matter what I trust myself that I'm always going to work it out what a great place to be.

Just. Such a huge step. And you know, I think a lot as well changed I think when, because you were talking about the hustle and you know, you were hustling so hard in the magazine and then you started a new business and it was the same thing again. So there was a point there as well that you started doing things a different way too, didn't you and got better results. Absolutely, absolutely Jackie. And you know, I know you know this as well that the old way of doing business is that we think the more that we do, the more that we hustle, the more we think about a business and pay attention to it, the more it grows. I actually worked out that it stifles your business, it constricts it, whereas when I let go a little bit more and I I just trusted and allowed it opened it up and my revenue, I'm trying to remember the exact figures, but I know that we three times my revenue in one year after that point, after that point of just going, I'm done with just on that borderline.

No way, not anymore. So, you know, three times and just instantly showed myself that when you let go of holding on so tightly to fear and you trust that the universe has got your back, Gabby Bernstein and you know, it really does. There you go. It's funny because you say that and yes, I'm starting to learn it, but I don't completely trust. And there's also and I've spoken to my co host or shy about this quite a few times. There's almost this thing in most of us where we're like you to work for everyone else, but not for me because there's something in me that will mean it won't work. Where did that disappear for you with a lot of work, I guess work. Yeah, Yeah, absolutely. A lot of inner work after that point, you know, having a little mini breakdown, we'll just call it that I delved really deep into hypnosis. I was determined to rewire my brain then that turned into meditation and turned more into a spiritual aspect about it.

And then I did a lot of clearing work, healing work from left to all of the things, so doing it for myself and going to practitioners and really went on that feminine journey of like really learning those ancient feminine principles and that was the training point for me that I was about to start really clearing out the muck, so to speak to allow me to be more of who I actually am. There's a lot of hope out there ladies, What advice would you go back and give you a 21 year old self, that scary girl who was just deciding not to be a teacher, I would say very much what I just said, Like, trust yourself, go within and tune into you have all the answers within and just trust that back in the day would have called a gut instinct, just trust that and go with it at all times. It will never serve the wrong. So at the moment, what do you do like on a daily basis?

To check in with yourself to make sure that you clear enough mentally to be listening to yourself to be listening to that gut feel, what do you, what do you bring into your life to do those things? Yeah, it's a really good question because if you had asked me a year ago, it would have been daily meditation. Daily tuning in, you know, daily rituals these days. It's my mornings, a few deep breaths And I'm in, wow. And you know, it's this really attunement to my higher self and my alignment that I feel like 95% of the time I'm living as my higher self. And I don't say that righteously. But I know when I'm dropping below the line and I made to pick myself up quickly. So it's a daily, minute by minute basis of seeing where my frequencies at. And I'm so attuned to wear my high frequency is that I'm able to come back, come back, come back as much as possible.

I have two Children. So their their times down. But with love of course, there you go. And I guess it's you can't just get there but well who's to say, you can't just get there. You've got to pull myself up on that one as well, you know, and the quickest way for anyone to be able to tune into your highest level frequency, higher self, whatever you wanna call it is. Making sure you tune into love. And you've heard me say this many times two. It's all about that love frequency and how to do that. You can simply do drop out of your brain into your heart space, even by gently touching that area and imagine breathing in and out. Love in that heart space. Yeah. As the Beatles said, all you need is love. Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah. It's a lovely concept though, isn't it?

And it can be the truth. So there you are. Thank you so much for your time. People want to find out more about you. I mean, we'll have all the links in the show notes and things. But where would you like them to go? Yeah, look, come and join my facebook group. It's really where I'm most active these days and I've simplified everything to just be in that group. So it's empire. F E M M. P I R E. Vampire. Excellent. And well, proper Linkin for that as well. So again, Janine, thank you so much for your time. You know that on the path with you. So I hope that there's plenty of others that want to jump in and join us. Yeah. Amazing. Thanks Jackie. And I think you know the work that we all do as women for other women is so important and you know, having you share these kind of interviews. I know that it's just one person and one spark changes things and that's the ripple effect that we need. So, thank you for doing what you're doing. Okay. What did you think? She's incredible. I was really inspired by this episode. And do you know what it makes you feel that it is possible to have a balance.

There's days where I feel like, you know, I'm sure you have this in our business that we go we start a business for lifestyle and balance but it just never happens right? Not early on and we were almost justify it to ourselves going oh yeah but it's still early and you know it's really not that early when you count to like five years but it's something that we still say and then you hear someone that's actually done it and I'm like oh it's just like I need to bring her, what's the freaking secret source here? Yeah. Yeah. And I mean she talked about that more at the end as well. It was so fascinating the change that she went through because in when she was running her magazines and even when she started coaching she was still in that hustle energy that I think both of us tend to do and I'm trying to shift out of it but it does take resources or just charging more than I want to charge. Well I think you're right, it's the resource thing because that's the first thing I thought of yesterday right to the point that I was almost calculating going right if I had, if money wasn't an object in the business, what resources would I get right to help me scale and you're absolutely right and there's two resources I would want one is like a BDM salesperson to help with the program and the second one would be a full time trainer and then I was like right ok, that's just like half a million dollars a year.

They're just didn't cost and then it's like, oh well to earn that a bit of hustle. So it's like you go back to the loop, don't you think it's how do you do that? Like it's yeah, there has to be, there has to be something that we're missing. But it does seem like it was more of a shift in mindset and I'm trying to do this myself because I do talk to her regularly about having a bit more trust and not holding on so tight, but I still don't completely trust, you know, it's a hard thing to let go before you see results. I mean it would be easy to, you know, change your mindset and trust after the fact, but it seems like it's the factor that changes it first. So I do think you can change it first to a certain extent because I feel like this year I have with my business by you know, remember we're talking about hiring the instructional designer and the V. A support. That was a big deal. Remember I said to you that oh my God, I'm gonna have to get a loan just to do that Toowoomba and I'm so glad I did that because now in that trust the course is built and the course is ready to be sold now next year.

So it's just, it's going to take one sale and I can pay that off. So I get the element of the trust and the mindset, but it almost feels like there's only so much of that you can leverage until you need to see the results, right? Yeah. Yeah, true. That's right. And then you go and then I can go, okay, I've got a little bit of results now I can sort of move the elastic a bit more and trust a bit more. Yeah. Yeah. Well there you go. I guess, I guess the process has got to be building trust then because you know everything that you do should gradually build that you can't just go from 0 to 100 trust level. Well no, it doesn't have to be built. But again, it's like, you know, it's almost like we need to see something to be able to then Mhm increase that percentage of trust right in ourselves and in our business. And sometimes I don't think the trust is even to do with ourselves. I think it's almost trusting the external circumstances around us as well. Yes. When you finished up your client last week and got your new one this week, were you fairly calm and trusting that something would come along?

Yeah, 100%. But I've worked on that now. And it's funny because I was talking to a couple of people about it and they were like, oh how are you feeling to it? So it was a pretty big client with a big actually the biggest chunk of my income and I was like, no, I know something's going to come up. I know something will come up and funny enough you'll laugh at this, but I'll share this story. I was even sort of manifesting a client that was a little bit more spiritual a little bit more, you know, not as corporate but a little bit more aligned with how I've been this year. And that's exactly what this company is. They put, they do weekly meditations, they've all gone to Bruno Brown live, they've got crystals all over the place. You know, it's like home from home. They're huggers like me. It's just they're just really cool people and very much all about EQ and sq and it literally happened in a week and it was an inbound as well. It was, I didn't even advertise, didn't do nothing. They were looking for you a day after I finished with my official, my client on Tuesday last week on Wednesday I got a text and yesterday was Wednesday we closed the deal in a week.

I mean that's gotta build trust for you surely. Yeah, 100%. And I was talking to someone yesterday actually and this is actually, this will be interesting for you as well Jack. I know that we've spoken about this with another podcast is the inner critic and the self worth aspect of things and I was talking to Sheila, who we're going to get on the podcast now over christmas and I booked her in and I did a business reading, like a soul reading for my business and she said that the business is going to do amazing with your course, and she goes, but that's on one timeline, because if you don't believe it, and you don't have self worth, it will go on a different path. And I was like, oh my God, yes, you're so right, and it will. So I'm not actually going to be looking at doing a bit of, you know, hypnotherapy on that over christmas, because I'm like, you know what, all the pieces are there, If I don't allow myself to trust and believe in myself, it's not gonna work because this isn't about, this isn't about competency anymore, like, as you say, you are the leading expert in EQ In Australia, and so the competency is not an issue. I mean, even if you weren't the leader, even if you were the second best, still be more competent than the other 30 million people in Australia and let alone globally.

So, but it's the self worth, it's our, it's our paradigms and our subconscious and as you know, we've talked about again this that our success is dependent on our subconscious patterns, not unconscious patterns, so we can, we can do affirmations, we can trust, we can do all of that, but if our subconscious is programmed against us, we're screwed. So I'm like, you know what, I'm gonna do this, I'm going to fix this, I'm going to book in a couple of sessions over christmas. So yeah, rewrite that subconscious, Huh? And hopefully that will allow a bit more of the trust for the new year. That plus Nicole's course over the next weekend. That's right. The meditation, because then you'll transcend Exactly, yeah, I hope you do. I haven't transcended yet. So like, as you're talking about with the competence, also thinking about Janine, like she had built so much competence over all the stepping stones that she'd had and looking ahead in her life, just leading university, there is no way that she would have looked ahead and realized where she could get to consciously.

But looking back, you can see the pathway is very clear that each step sort of built on her competence and her skills and led to her being able to trust as well. So there's there's a whole lot of skill building in there as well as that self worth as you're talking about and the confidence. Yeah, I agree. You're right. It is, it is and I think it's like a step, isn't it, that every step you take up that ladder, you know, you get more and more confident about what it is that your business can achieve, but I think we all have that, it's like, you know, freedom is that the equivalent of enlightenment human being, right, that epitome of where you want to be at the end goal of your business is to have that level of balance and freedom. But I don't think it is a one answer fits all. Like I choked at the beginning of the podcast going, you know, wandering and go, what's that missing missing thing? What's that magic secret? But there isn't, I think it's a combination of all different things that lead up to having a successful business that allows you freedom.

And a lot of it is about consciously designing it and not allowing yourself probably to get into that hustle mode because once you start in the hustle, it's from experience. It's hard then to change and move because people expected of you and You expect it of yourself myself. How many times I did this yesterday actually, it was like 11:30 last night and I just got caught up in other stuff, work stuff, but I didn't really get to do any client work yesterday and at 11:30 I was feeling guilty for going to bed. I literally was like Why am I going to bed right now? But it was 11:30 and I'm like we should go to bed. But it's it's that thing, isn't it? The expectation that we put on ourselves sometimes. So yeah, it is 100% ourselves. What do you think about how much Janine's confidence changed over time as well because she really called herself a scaredy cat as a as a young, 20 year old. And yet there are there are clearly moments where she could put the scaredy cat aside because of her passion and then it just seemed that it built enough confidence that it wasn't an element anymore.

Mm hmm. Yeah, I agree. I think that's 100% possible is I think we all have a little bit of that when we're starting out a little bit of that imposter syndrome that we've spoken, about the fear of being judged. Yeah. And what people are gonna think, but I think as you do more and more and more and you align yourself to more of your truer nature and you work in alignment with that and that confidence thing will just grow. It must have a lot to do with work being in alignment with what you're passionate about. Because it was fairly clear when Janine was standing in front of class, full of high school students, that she was so scared about being up the front, being judged. And yet she could stand out the front of a group of a similar sized amount of people on a tour because she was so passionate about it and Exactly, yeah. So it's it's I think just working as close as possible to your truest calling, isn't it? Whatever that may be. And if that changes, that's cool too.

But I mean, how many people are we interviewed on a podcast that had those career changes and, you know, their confidence hasn't been affected. It's more of the excitement of moving into this now. Yeah, absolutely. In fact, it's a pretty common theme, isn't it? What do you think about the burning the boats? Because I suppose even thinking about other guests as well who have transitioned, they've sort of totally committed and Janine has said, you know, she consciously went all in and didn't give herself an out. So there was no option but to succeed. I agree with that. I think if you're going to do something like that, I don't think you can have one foreign and one for our because you're not going to give it your all, it's not going to be successful then because you're a meandering, right? So I I agree. It's like when I left the law, I was like, that's it. It's done, there's no option to go back for work in the, in the area or even with clients, I've never even up until last year had clients in that industry, you know, it's just like, no, I'm not doing it because otherwise it's going to sneak you back in and go, you know, yeah, I've got this skill, I could just do this for you and, and he almost justify it to yourself if you're new thing, isn't working out as quickly as you'd like it, You can almost go, oh, well, you know what, I shouldn't have done that, I can go back and I mean thinking about it, it is a huge jump, isn't it?

I mean for yourself you're a single mom, there's no option to fail for Janine. You know, she was supporting her husband in a career change at the same time and two babies. Yeah, that's right, failure is not an option. It's just not, you just gotta hate the word, but you just gotta pivot and go, right, I've got to make this work in whichever way I can and do whatever it takes. I was talking to a friend yesterday and he's wanting to have a bit of a career change. He's in sales, really successful work with businesses all over the world, lived in, you know, four or five different countries and he's like, I want to help other salespeople ie become a coach and he set everything up. Pretty much, did everything, got the website ready, got it. And then last minute chickened out. And the reason he chickened out was he got a promotion at work and financial security as opposed to oh you know what, it's actually going to be hard to replicate my income. I was like, absolutely, it will be, you're not going to make that income straightaway, it's just not going to happen. But you've got to be willing to put the work in, but then if it's not your passion, I don't think it was, right, okay then don't do it.

So I think you'll know right when you make that career change, if it's something you're gonna go work in a supermarket if you have to pay your bills because it's your passion to create that business or not. And that's the point that I was like, I was ready to do that. Yeah, I was ready to take a second job instead of staying where we were correct. Yeah. And you know, there's a lot out there that at the moment is building up entrepreneurship as if it's the way everyone has to be going. And so I think a lot of people who aren't meant to work for themselves are potentially going, this is the way I should be going. So maybe like you said, you're successful, sales guy was like, well I'm so successful, this is what I should be doing because so many others are doing this, but actually no, you don't have to do what so many people say you should know, but you can, that's the point, right, that you can just have a really successful career in a business as an employee, there's nothing wrong with that.

And I think you're also going to cause yourself misery if you're trying to put yourself in the camp of being that's not what you want to do. Yes. Stay, playtime, They're cute, They're like teenagers, they are going to show you my hands and I'm going to use that little snippet of video, Yeah, having a bit of a cuddle, so wishes pets are having a bit of a wrestle. And so I'm just going to pop that little bit of video into the show notes for you all to see because there might be a few little noises that you've heard and then they're just going at it, just having a play. Yeah, it's lovely. Oh yeah, I think you know, this episode is a good one to come back to a few times and just particularly the end there because Janine starts opening up about some of the secret source and that's, you know, that's what I get to talk to her regularly about two.

So it's certainly something that she focuses on with people that she's working with and all the links will be in the show notes. If anyone wants to continue the conversation and asked more. By all means, please reach out on our website, I Q meets eq dot com dot au or where we post on linkedin as well. That's always a great place to have a conversation because she and I are always on linkedin. But if you want to contact us directly push where you eq dot Academy. Wonderful. And the best email for me these days is Jackie at legally wise women dot com dot au. So another one down one more episode before christmas guys and I'll do a little bit, Yeah. Debrief 2021 And you know, it's funny because I still tend to try and go 2020, but it's no another year gone 2021. So yeah, we'll catch you next week, everyone. Thanks. Right.

Ep88 Trust Yourself and Burn the Boats!
Ep88 Trust Yourself and Burn the Boats!
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