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Client Corner: Damian Gilbert part 2

by Shaun Kober
April 26th 2021

Damian is a friend, colleague and client.

He served his country, and experienced the highs and lows of war that most front-line soldiers share. From being blown up in an Improvised Explosi... More

what does it mean to live life to the fullest train to your potential and perform at your best. Leave nothing on the table. That's a non negotiable is that I I strive to be better every day because if I'm not on top of my game, how is anybody else gonna follow me down the road? Keep demanding more of yourself to live up to that potential and to stay hungry. Training is progress. You know when I look at the word training, I think of steps, baby steps to get somewhere that you want to be and that is basically your life journey. It's a mindset in itself, man, it's like, it's not just about I know that for you, a lot of that's about the physical, but we're constantly in training, whether it's growing our skill sets, whether it's growing our physical bodies, whether it's growing our relationships whatever and all of that is a training ground and that kind of goes back to the mindset that we just talked about, You underestimate yourself and you don't even start. But then once you start, you often surpass what you thought you could do performance your best mate. That's that's sort of what life is all about. You don't have the knowledge and have the fitness, the healthy ambition and drive that no matter what comes along.

When that next phone call comes, I can just say yes, I don't have to worry, just go and do it, yo what's up guys, welcome to this episode of the live transform podcast, I'm your host, Sean koba joining me for my client corner series is my man Damien Gilbert who is a friend, a colleague was an intern for me at Tiger muay thai and is one of my clients. This is part two of a great conversation that I had with him discussing the many tools and principles that we've implemented in his life to allow him to be better at life. Let's get this episode underway. Keep your mind clear, keep your mind that don't let your mind drowning that ship because I could have gone back to my old days and just drink it up, get on some fucking bullshit up and just start swiping, swiping, swiping and just fill that void with unnecessary ship that I didn't need to, you know, and it's just back on this vicious cycle of not being accountable for my actions, which is again when I reach out to you, I knew it was gonna be cutting driving, it's like you're sucking up here do this, that's what I like most, some people might not like that.

But if you put your ego aside man, you give it a shot, you know, turn into a robot and I'm a very emotional game. I'm still me, I'm just me taking care of me before I take care of anybody else. No. Yeah, that's that's powerful man, A couple of things that I want to unpack there. So you mentioned earlier that you would you go for a run. I remember talking to you was about maybe six months ago. I was actually on my my road trip around Thailand um I was driving around Thailand I had a call with you and I was like walking down the street man on a phone call with you and say, hey buddy, how's it going? Yeah man, good. But you know, I'm seeing some, you know, I want to help other people around me because people are asking me like dude, you seem like you're in a good place, you seem like you're much better, you know, what are you doing? I'm working with this coach blah blah blah. You know? And then you would tell like they would ask you questions and you would tell them what you were doing and you give them recommendations and then they wouldn't fucking do it. And you're like how do I get these people to follow this stuff? And I was like dude, you just got to be the example man. Like don't don't tell people what to do, fucking show them what to do, you know?

And and I as you said, I said to you, it's like, you know, something you can do is you know, you tell people, hey, I'm I'm not using my phone for the first hour of the day, I'm like what are you doing in the first hour of the day I get up I go for a run by the but I'm like all right cool. Make sure that when you get up and you go for a run, you fucking put your phone on the kitchen table where everyone can see it and then you funk off for an hour and you come back and people like yeah yeah what's going on there? And then they see it, they see that you're actually doing it rather than just being told man, that's that's powerful bro. It happened with my mom, you know uh my dad as well while he was still here. So it was asked me like they're a little concerned. You're not. Everybody wakes up at four a.m. Five A. M. Uh huh. And the reason why I run too because it's a my funk man. It sucks. I hate it. But I love the mental aspect. It's a challenge. And obviously my body hurts my knees hurt on my back. I'm not going for a run. I'm an idiot. I would have before. But you pushed through this right? Exactly.

But like you said, amen, you need to rest, you need to sleep. Your sleep needs to be good. So I left my phone, took my headphones and that was it. And I get back months ago we messaged you to have coffee together and we got my phone's right there. She's like, oh you didn't take a phone running. Usually I did. But now you know, I just do everything on my watch and she was like, you know, so I think a week later before I flew back to Afghanistan, I told you was like just leave your phone or let's go have coffee together. The conversation was different, man. You interact with people in a whole different way when you don't have that ship right there when you wake up and you allow your body to wake up and like you said, you do things for you, man, you brush your teeth, do whatever your t your coffee or breakfast, whatever you need to do whatever, right? And then you go Jack off. Then I've been here a little too long, man, Jack. And then you pick up your phone afterwards. You don't feel like you're rushing to do the things that you enjoy doing for yourself. You know what I mean?

You're good, you're you um I'm nobody special men were fucking humans and I think we all go through a bunch of shit that wakes you up one day and say, you know what, I can't live like that. I can't do this to myself. I can do this to those around me anymore. I don't want to be an influencer. But I know that if two or three people that Hear my story or two or 3 people that know what happened about for real. You know, uh if that helps them, that's dope because that's what helped me man because you know your deployment, your training, then you're working with all these athletes and all that. You've given me the opportunity to work at Tiger man, that to me, it was great because it also was a therapy for because I go to Tiger and I'll be around people and I'll be training and I'll be tired, I'll be eating while that man. So I'm always what I tell people, I'm forever grateful for sean for that ship because I could have just spending time and sucking up, I was gonna disability, I didn't need to work but it was good to have that outlet. It was good and then I got the opportunity to learn and I realized as a man there's more to this than just a strong body, you know and the military of the ship exactly in the military, all your strong mind, strong body, that's all you need man, you need to feel thanks dude, it's good to feel shit, it's good to be vulnerable, it's good to talk to people, it's good to let your shut out, don't be a victim either, you know what I mean?

Everybody has bad days. So I that's what I tell everybody, you know, I work with Sean and people like well weren't you a coach and I do man? It's different bro and even a coach needs a coach, you know, another coach is a mentor, your mentor needs a mentor, nobody here knows it all, there's experiences that we've lived there are crazy, you know, and then there's somebody that probably has never been war, that has really cool experiences, like I didn't learn from this dude, you know? Yeah man, absolutely, and that's a great point, like, you know, you mentioned the coaches development sessions that I run at Tiger, you know, that was as much for me as it was for the other coaches, you know, initially I had some pushback from the coaches because they're like this because I just recently become the head coach, I was fairly new there and there was a lot of pushback because they're like this dude's going to tell us what we should be doing, what we, what we need to do to do it right and what we're doing wrong and blah blah blah and I was like, well that's your perspective one, so it took me a little bit of time to build that trust, build that report, but then once, you know, once I got that buy in from the coaches, then they all fucking started like loving it and started enjoying coming to those coaches development sessions and everyone had an import and I was learning just as much from them as they were learning from me and it was, it was like a good um a circle of personal growth that we got together and we had the opportunity to share things with each other every single week man, where we're talking about the things that we were learning the podcast that we were listening to, you know, going through um you know, the courses that we're doing, um you know an individual rights and sharing those lessons, sharing those stories and you know, and just just being around each other man in that positive environment, it was really cool.

Yeah man, I never thought I was going to be able to do a handstand, then cap had to do that ship and I was like, oh look at that dude, yeah look at this. On one hand now it was, it was really good man. I uh life is a beautiful thing. Then even if you've been through war, if you haven't been through, if if you haven't been through actual physical war, you've been through war somehow and you're all path, you know man putting that ego assignment and accepting that you have flaws. That's what helped me, man, that's why I started doing all this, you know, sleep, nutrition, discipline, time management, all these things um because and there's a lot of bad people, but there's more good people out there, so if you can be one good, yes do that person man, you know, uh it's really, it opens up your eyes to know that even with you, you know when we talk and that that was one point I wanted to bring, I was like, man, I'm gonna work with Sean and I'm gonna see if this motherfucker practices what he preaches, right?

So first weekend, okay man, I'm sucking detoxing, no phone the whole week and my goddamn it's really, so then you implement those things man at work, you know, it's not everybody's cup of tea, I get it, some people need to be on the phone because of work or whatnot. Uh then uh the Farrells in Thailand, you know, Eddie and Brooke there, Eddie and I never lost touch man, real goo goo. And he's also aware of what mental health brings and stuff. I like his outlook on a lot of sh it, and again, it's a person that has probably not seeing war, but has been through the wringer, he fights and he's doing left wig and you know, more thai he'd be like, fuck dude, you're not gonna tell me to stand up in front of another dude with almost nothing on my hands and going at it. So it's a different type of mental strength that you have to have and to continue to have a positive attitude, man. Uh so I take from working together, I've like, grasp other people's experiences and I'm like, man, I'm sure they have bad days too, you know, what do they do with them?

Yeah, that's a mate, that's sucking, that's awesome man. Um I think it was Epictetus or something is a greek philosopher. Um that said, it's not what happens to you that causes dramas. It's how you perceive it. I think that's that's powerful man, because, you know, as you said, we, we go through similar situations, we go through similar things and you know, your mindset, your outlook is going to determine how you react to those things. Mhm. Um Now what I want to talk about is obviously I'm very sorry to hear that your dad passed man and we we've been in contact um since then um you know, kind of touching base and um helping you deal with that and just checking in to make sure that you're okay and you're doing the right thing. And um looking after yourself because as you said man, you needed to be at your best so that you can be at your best for other people and you know, obviously it's fucking terrible news to hear something like that.

Have to fly back from Afghanistan back to the States, be with your family. But as you said, man, like if you weren't doing those things and you just you know drown your sorrows, got on the pierce and you know fucking started filling that void with other things, then you couldn't have been that rock that your family needed at that time. Can you talk about that? Some of the tools that you maintained one, first of all, talk to me about like how that impacted you emotionally when you found out then getting back to your back home to your family environment and how they were dealing with it and then what you needed to do to be at your best so that you could support the rest of your family, right? So um yeah, thanks for you know the condolences. And yeah, we were in touch and you were one of the few people that reached out to me to wonder how it's doing mentally, which was, you know, I have, I tell people I don't have many friends, but the friends that I do have hit me up when I needed the most and that's all I fucking need. And when I found out it was, he went to the hospital due to Covid.

I know a bunch of people don't believe in it, whatever. And uh he was getting better than they found other complications on their mind. You I'm in Afghanistan this whole time. My sister's calling me crying, face crying. And uh my mom rarely spoke to me during that time because she doesn't want me to worry while I'm here. I get it. And she's a very strong woman and I guess she didn't want me to see her vulnerable. So then they had to amputate my father's like and how to put him on dialysis. And uh then one day he just stopped breathing. So they asked me if I wanted to resuscitate it. So I said, fuck yeah, try again. Then my mom said, you know, it's really hard on the body. It's a traumatic event that I don't care. Try again. And that's one of the times that you know, you start praying and you only remember God and ships into the fan and not what you need to and if you don't believe in God, whomever you believe in. So it kind of took a step back man and I was like, okay, I've been doing all this work for myself now.

It would be a great time to fucking relax. Sounds twisted to some, but I look the back, whatever happens happens to my father, I can't change anything and if I get too emotional, I'm going to be a mess and then that's going to make four of us a mess at home work was really good man. They wanted to send me home the very next day was the gate. Uh he's still on the ventilator, you know, he's still in a coma. Let me wait a little bit more because I can see him and at the time and someone told me there were a, you should go ahead and buy the cremation package for him now if you want to get him cremated because it's gonna be cheaper. I was like, man, I don't want to, that's like killing my dad, you know? But I think personal growth man and discipline. It's kind of what made me pull the trigger on that and I went ahead and paid for it.

Uh two days later he passed away and I was home three days after that, I'm not gonna lie from the 15th to the 18th, I was a mess master how to work. I was crying in my room like I don't wanna talk to many people. And uh but those crying in those three days also made me realize. All right man, you're about to help on this plane home now. It's now it's when you now is when you show your true self now is when you show that you can be human. You've already showed emotion but you have to keep your ship together. You have to be disciplined. This is hard. This is where you either choose to go home and go out and drink because I wanted to or you go home And the moment I hugged my mom she started crying the moment I saw my sisters they started crying. They will grab my father's clothes and we all went to his room in and I was like and then I started crying but I will walk away because I would want them tearing up right now. I'm trying not to And it's hard because then you know it seems to me it was more of my mothers and my sisters, you know tops And I always had that amen.

You need to be disciplined because if something happens to me. You got this ship. Mm hmm. See my mom, she wasn't really hysterical but she was so sad. So and so she forgot to eat. She wouldn't sleep. She would even shower man. My sister's same thing. So a few days went by, we're human and we're all sitting on the kitchen table like a we have to eat, let's go out to eat, we have to get a good night's sleep, pop some melatonin if you need to, we have to do these things, but we also have to embrace the fact that he's gone. So are we going to remember him like this in a coma and him not waking up Or are we going to remember the goofy self that this guy was man, he helped a lot of people. He's a good dude. He saw his grandchildren grow up a little bit, you know, up until they were 10 or so he saw my sister get married. He said all these things man, my other sisters that they're all in a good place. So yeah, it's really fucked up.

But had I not had my mind right? Had I not had my insecurities in check and being okay with them, Had I not been mindful of what I'm thinking and I'm thinking I would have been right there with my mom and sisters and you know, hugging them and having them cry obviously made me want to cry, you know, yeah, I will shut here with them and stuff, but I had to understand that it's life man. You know what, maybe my mom's next, Maybe I don't wake up tomorrow so I can't get mad at life and you know, I just was grateful. I was grateful for the experience. Uh in a way it made me realize that you take life too fucking serious sometimes and you never know man. My dad went into the hospital thinking he was gonna wake up mm And uh it was hard because I tell as did everyone else. Exactly it was a precautionary thing right? And uh being being uh you know your mind has like you know your hands from lifting you get calluses.

I feel like the more life experiences you get you get calluses in your mind and it helped me embrace that man and I was so thankful. Which is why I was telling you last time spokesman I was dude thank you because those small changes that I've made have made such a big impact. That allowed me to be there for my family man. It allowed me to not think twice. I said mom you haven't worked. I got you. I got your bills. I got I need you to grief. You just lost your partner for 37 plus years. You and my sisters need to breathe but we can't forget ourselves because you know we need to we need to keep that in mind and you don't realize how much you don't want to eat man when my dad died those first he doesn't want to eat. I don't wanna do anything right. You know I was just like suck it. My dad's bond. What am I gonna do? You you do more. You know, you do sink. But this man had this decided journey in this past year was like from getting this job to working with you, it was like getting me ready to react to what comes next in an ideal world.

My parents will always be alive, whatever and but we're not, you know, maybe I think it's the circle of life, you better your parents and it just shows that man, if mental health is is such an important thing is just as important as physical health. Yeah, if not more. I believe man and I used to think that physical health was the most important thing, but you know, the last probably 56 years, probably even longer as I've been going through, like my coaching journeyman, I've realized like the mental health is so fucking powerful man. Like the mental health needs to be on point if you're going to improve your physical health and improve your quality of life. You know, when I first started working with people, man, I did my PT course in 2012, when I was getting out of the army, um started my own business, went strength conditioning, nutritional therapy, NLP neuro linguistic programming, etc. But when I first started, it was all about the training program, the nutrition and then, you know, I would blame my clients if they weren't getting the results that they wanted.

Well you're not doing this, you're not following the program, blah blah blah And it got to a point where it's like I need to figure out why I'm not serving these people and if I'm blaming them, then you know, I'm not helping them. What can I take responsibility for? I need to be accountable for that. They're fucking paying me for my expertise and then, you know, that kind of bread this up front, dry straight down the line. Um you know, method that I'm using now which obviously comes from being in the military and um having that rank structure and you know, the need to be able to fucking tell the blokes either side of you that the truth um you know, without without fear of repercussion. But um over time I realized that how I was talking to my clients and how they were talking to themselves was more important than the training program and the nutrition plan. You know, because I could figure out where someone was at and how they were going to move through our coaching um program together by how they spoke man and the words that they used and how they um you know how their mind worked and that was fucking powerful for me man to be able to look at those things and go all right, this person has low self esteem and they have all these other things like lack of confidence and blah blah blah.

All right. Call Watson tools that I can use and then I started using psychology and behavioral therapy to start talking to them in a manner that could reframe how they spoke to themselves so that they could set themselves up for little winds throughout the day. Man, they were ticking the boxes, little winds, little winds, little winds because those little winds, our achievements and achievements are fuckin my mind, man, like that's that personal growth and achievement is the meaning of life in my mind, you know? So um I want, I want you to talk about some of those things um that you started implementing and you know again we, we spoke earlier about progressive overload but you know, I don't say to you, hey, do your sleeping four hours a night? I need you to sleep eight hours a night. Okay, cool, you're sleeping four hours a night. I need you to get 4.5 hours do that for two weeks, then get five hours, do that for two weeks, blah blah blah blah. Talk to me about those tools that we've implemented, but also how you've tweaked them, how you've used progressive overload, how you've adjusted them to your life, not just um not just overall, but how you might change them day to day depending on what's going on.

Yeah, well, you know when we started working then I was, I always thought I was a relatively healthy person and my sleep pattern was always jacked up by, I would not have consistent sleep and then the little questions where you know, and a lot of these things you see on instagram, right? Everybody on instagram is a freakin genius. Uh, there are so many people out there just copy and pasting, but you do run into real, recognizes real. So you got a, are your lights, are there any lights in your room? I don't know. Let me check. Oh fucky. I have a bunch of little lights, market is a tv on where you're trying to lay down. Yeah. Hey, when was the last time you ate before you try to see? What are you doing? What are you, what's your sleep hygiene? Like I was fun while I was in the army. I didn't have sleep hygiene bro. You know, you just sleep in a tank. You can sleep on the street, you can see anywhere you sleep wherever bruh describe your Cavallari pretty behind you rack out for a few hours and you never think about sleeping hygiene, especially when you're drunk or pilled out because you just go to bed.

You wake up, it's got a little hangover soup media. Like now I have a career that I enjoy that I love and it allows me to live a lifestyle that I like. So I do have to think about my sleeping habits. I do have to think about my, my thoughts. So I started doing that. I was like, okay before bed. Let me shut this. Shut off. Let me delights I even have right here on this week and they see a light covering up the little number because that hits me in the face when I'm trying to go to bed and believe it or not, that help. And you know I went I did go from four hours to about 5.5 and I was like okay maybe I was just tired because I was just training that I went from 5.5 To freaking seven my Goddamn then eight. And then the jet like hit and I was telling you broke this jet like has fucked up. I cannot nope. I go to sleep at two PM, wake up baba baba. This is this is when you flew home when I flew home and now when I came back so there's levels to this ship, right?

You just suck it up and stay away and go to sleep at night. No wrong. You were like, hey this is how the body works. This is how your body works at night. This is why you feel this way in rhythm. Mm My dumbass was trying to work out hard to get tired to see kind of like no, do the opposite bro. Your body is adjusting your body can you know do this, go for a light job or don't go for a jog at all stretch, do this, do that this time here. I've been back for 11 days I think and I did that, you know, I'm gonna go for a low, nice long job, slow my running here. It's uh you know, it's my show like running. So I started asking you a my time for running needs to be this, my time for running needs to be that cool. Are you? You know, it all ties out to sleep if I'm not well rested, I'm not performing well Now that I've been well rested. Now that I know that the jet lag is real, that this 9.5 hours at least gonna take me, you know, nine days, 10 days because my body needs to this one or everything.

You don't think that way when you're just an average person, you want to stay away And so people, yeah, for people listening, I'll dive into that in a little bit of detail. I've spoken about numerous times. But um for any new listeners, uh your body has essentially oclock the body clock is circadian rhythm. So, um evolutionary speaking, our circadian rhythm releases different hormones at different times of the day to essentially make us do ship. So in the morning our body starts releasing cortisol adrenaline, Light hits our eyes and that produces effects physiological effects in the body. That essentially get us to start changing our hormone profile. Then as we get towards um sundown, then the same thing happens. You know, the body starts kind of going into a parasympathetic state where it should do um you know light stops, stops hitting our eyes etcetera etcetera. Which then changed their hormone profile to get us ready for bed. But in the world that we live in, we have all these fucking artificial lights that are shining in our eyes all the time.

And blue light in particular from the light spectrum um reduces the production of um melatonin which allows you to get to sleep now. Um That's something that we've spoken about numerous times was you know, reducing your light once the sun goes down, dimming the lights, maybe even wearing blue light blocking glasses to reduce that blue light load. But also with jet lag, the reason jet lag occurs is because you go from was the difference between where you're at now and home like nine hours, one half hour and a half hours. Yeah. So when you go from different time zones, when you move from across different time zones, for every hour of time difference, there is roughly a day that your body needs to adjust. So if it's nine hours time difference than your body is going to need nine hours, nine days roughly to readjust its circadian rhythm and get everything back in line so that you're waking up producing adrenaline cortisol to get up evolutionary speaking, you know, seek out shelter, search for food and water, right?

But then when the sun goes down, your body starts producing different hormones, change your hormone profiles so that you can go into a parasympathetic state, rest and digest recover overnight so you can get up and fucking do those things, you need to survive again the next day. Yeah. And you know you don't think about it when you're on my side of the coin, you're just the dude gonna work and I got to work and you wonder why I feel this way until you talk to someone that fucking knows and they explain all this with big words and then also dumbing it down for me to understand like, oh sh it makes sense and it makes sense. I need to I need to dumb it down so I can understand it. Sh it what does that make me? So then I implemented you know and I'm doing that thing man and I run time is better than ever. Uh I love my runtime. A runtime has to go down drastically, but it's not simply because I'm sleeping simply because I feel like I've learned to tie down every little bit of bad stuff that's happened to what I've learned, working with you to what I've learned, reading to what I've learned, listening to audiobooks, what I learned, you know, putting at that time Because before I would just come here and play 12 hours of call of duty.

Easy money man. We're getting paid do not uh go to the gym and that's it now. It's more I still gained a whole lot but my priorities are different, you know it's uh that my sleep pattern, my eating and my hydrated and my thinking straight and I think improper thoughts, how am I feeling when I wake up? I would never think about that ship now just wake up and like oh what a beautiful fucking Damon. Let's go. I'm a little curious machine. Make my coffee honey in it, good to go. Yeah it's a perspective. It opens up your eyes on how you're living life and again then I hear we worked with the people from the pop the carcass and the beautiful beings bro, there's such hard working dudes and you learn to treat everybody the same, you learn to treat everybody with the same energy with the same respect and uh those people see you running and then sometimes you just see them, they're motherfucker's running too and it's cool man. You see this is just, it's a contagious, you know you don't have to be uh what's the crossfit and rich fronting or anything.

You have to do any of these dudes are like beast, you can be healthy, you could be fit and you can feel good by just implementing little by little and you can still be a healthy as person so it's it's good to accept that that was my big thing, my big takeaway from everything has been, it's been good to one Accept Life Lessons, stop blaming other people worked on my insecurities worked on my floss uh and realizing that there's a lot of ship that I don't know man. That's that's fucking powerful man. There's so much bro. Well we talk like dude, I thought I knew that but you put me over here, she hits the family being my truck ready to go and fucking three minutes or less. I mean I could but that's not learning how to switch on, switch off. Exactly. That's not like when I'm home, I'm good man, I'm chilling, I'm relaxed, I've learned how to do that, I've learned how to do that.

I'm still learning which is why I love this. Uh the asking questions and I'm learning Even people from different cultures. Ramadan starts April 13 you know? Yeah, we have to learn how to adapt. We're in their country, I'm I'm a foreigner here, I'm not a presence of force and I can act like an asshole. You know, even though I'm the security element, even though we have you know whatever, I still have to be respectful, I still have to be like, but you know when you're a young of course you're in your early teens, early twenties you don't give a funk, you don't think about any of that. We've all been there. Yeah exactly. You your mind's elsewhere you think, you know, to hit our age. You're like, damn, damn, that's the same that everybody has uh I could go back with what I know now my life would be totally different, but I'm good where I'm at man, I'm glad I seeked out. I'm glad I reached out.

I'm glad we never lost touch even with the people of Tiger man. I talked to a few once in a while and it's cool because I see where their life is, that man, they seem happy, but even though they seem happy, I also understand that they've also had ship days. Um So I'm 100% content with this wild fucking journey from getting blown up shot at being a cop and running after people and hug him uh to now which I'm in the same element as I was this is a lot more call, you know, we're not during conflict all the time or rarely any conflict to be honest with you, the job just sounds good on paper, but it is an important role so, but there's yeah, the thing with that is like, yes, you might not be fucking in in troops in contact every day, but there's always the potential for that to happen. So you always need to be on high alert. You need to be fucking ready for when the ship does hit the fan because that's where issues start coming in is where people get complacent and they were like, oh well this is, you know, this is this is just how it is, it's a pretty cruzi job, blah blah blah and yes, it might be cruising at times, but there's going to be some stage where you need to be able to fucking switch that worry, your mind set on exactly, you gotta learn how to uh you can't be that guy all the time.

You know, nobody wants to be around the guy that lives in his past and talks about, you should be in the army cool story bro, it's good to see, it's good to seek help. Like I said, dude, being here, working here, having this talk with you, uh it's crazy because I'm always implement what I learned and I've got to the point where I'm gonna feel that requires me to be humble, I'm gonna feel that doesn't require me to be an arrogant asshole. Uh and this teaches you that how you treat yourself, what you do with you, are you disciplined enough to put your phone away for a few hours a day? Are you disciplined enough to eat? What's right for you most of the time? That's how you treat you, man, that's what people say self love, self care about bullshit. You got to show that it's easy to say, I love you. It's hard to show that ship. So once you show it, that's a, you know, that's a great point, man. People say self love. Self care, I fucking give myself whatever I want and I'm like, that's not self love, that's not self care, that's self indulgence, you know, self love.

Self care is fucking like restricting the things that are fucking easy and giving yourself a little bit of adversity every now and again, whether it's through training or whether it's through fasting or whether it's through digital detox is or removing those fucking nice comfortable things in your life for a period of time so that when you do start using those things again, you fucking appreciate it and you're grateful for it. That is self love. That is self care in my mind For 100%. I don't know if you've heard of certain like military guys are like Oh I go to bed at fucking 98 P. M. And I wake up at three a.m. Because I have to be up before the enemy, personally, I don't agree with that ship because I feel like we're losing the human touch, right? Like you said it's okay and then sometimes you got to sleep in a sleeping man, your body needs that you need to feel human. And most people think that when we do things like not have our phones, making ourselves uncomfortable is by going the long run is going hard live scoring the hard work out, go to jiu jitsu class, going to a boxing class were not my type class, that's when I was a tiger man, I was fighting, I wanted to see what I was about, you know what I mean?

We're about to throw down with somebody that wants to throw down with you and it humbles you bro, you know it shows you you're you can be anything but you're no one, so if you choose to do good and learn and ask other people about their life experiences and what they've been through, I'm sure you love playing rugby but it's a good fucking push to let all that sh it out, you know what I mean? When you grab some dude it's one 100% man and that's that's a that's a controlled and like you said man like jiu jitsu martial arts for me it's rugby and I I've taken up B. J. J. Recently as well in the last six months and dude like I'm sucking loving it man because it allows me to channel my natural aggression and competitiveness which increases my testosterone levels you know so and keeps everything balanced so um I think that's important for people, particularly man man to understand that you know we need to be competitive with certain things, sometimes we need to be competitive with other people in that um in that kind of combat or contact environment, but we also need to be competitive with ourselves at times, but again it's at times it's about applying that tool at the appropriate time, we can't be competitive with others and competitive with ourselves all the time.

We need to pick and choose when we go into those battles, otherwise you just fucking burn the candle at both ends and burn yourself out. 100% bro. I think when you compete especially these guys a tiger, you know or all over the world, people that dedicate themselves to martial arts, mixed martial arts, whatever it is that they do for a living as a profession or when it comes to sports man, these guys have a different chip, you know, um they know they all believe they have a deep in their mind that they're going to make it, you know, but the hard reality of it is a lot of them don't. And you could see sometimes the difference between the guys that make it and the guys that no look at, you know your client peter, you know that kid was wild when I was entitled man. It was, you could see that yeah, you can see that mentality man and you can see even the Hickman brothers bro, I talked to Georgia frank sometimes and there awesome news to get from and you see them now I think frank's in the States and you see how they, its aircraft, it's not a hobby, it's not uh I did this for a few months so I'm going to call myself a fighter.

These guys live that read that this is that's their comfort zone. So to them for them to be uncomfortable, it has to be something totally different. But these guys that fight the guys that you coach, the guys that are in this environment there are different beast man whole different mentally. They're different and they're the ones that learn you know also have to learn the other aspect of life which is comfort. It's okay to not train one day it's okay to enjoy the things from. But a lot of them do you want to grind because I want to make it so bad. So where do you draw the line with these guys? You know what I mean? Like a rest bro? You need to rest, take it easy today. Yeah dude that's that's like literally been my job as a coach like with Petty and as you said like You know I've I've trained him I think five of his UFC fights and since he signed his first contract made his debut um and normally only have him for like 468 weeks during fight camp when he's in Thailand. And my job man yes my job is to make him you know stronger faster, more explosive build his engine so that he has the endurance to be able to fight his fight.

But you know if I'm not managing his stress levels and his workload and his recovery so that I can get the most out of him in that training session then you know there's a potential for injury, there's potential for burnout because all of the other coaches he's working with the Hickman Hickman brothers, he's working with George on his M. M. A. Is working with Frankie with his wrestling. He's working with Alex for his B. J. J. You know, he's working with johnny on his striking and he's working with me for his strength in addition. So he's got all these coaches that are sucking subject matter experts in their own fields right? But all of these other coaches are fucking pushing him to the limits man, They're hammering him so he gets to me and he's dragging his heels, his head's down. I can see that he's fucking tired man. But he's not going to show any weakness he wants to get after it. And I'm like I just go through some assessments and balanced based assessments and I'm like all right cool. I can see that he's a little bit fatigued today. I'll take his blood pressure, I'll take his heart rate variability. I see what his readiness level is and I can see how much stress he is under and then all tweak and adjust the training session.

I'm still going to get him to work hard. I'm going to do enough to elicit the response that I want but not so much that I'm now taking away from his ability to perform in all of his other sessions with his other coaches man because if he does too much and I do too much and you can't hold his hands up inspiring. He's getting punched in the face by other dudes or you know, he's practicing poor technique because he's really tired then that's going to carry over to the cage. So my job for the most part is to pull him back man and manage that recovery and make sure that he fucking, you know, we do enough to elicit the right response, but you know, he doesn't pick up any injuries is able to recover, he's able to manage his energy level so you can get the most out of every one of his training sessions. And if you were just a guy that, this is why I enjoy the, you know, sleep time management and all that thing, you know what I mean? If you were just a trainer that we want to get your client tired or whatever, you just pushed through uh, the importance of recovery man and the mental health aspect of, I'm sure like the fight game that these guys have to go through, it's, you know, to them, to them fighting and they're willing to die there.

It's just like to us being over here man, hey man, Ship hits the fan, you want to play? Let's go son. This is what I get paid to do. I'm ready. Uh, same thing for them, you know, the moment that they're training so hard for maybe one round or five burns. So they have to have that switch, but they also have to know how to relax. Those have to know how to listen to their body and a lot of it comes from good coaching, good mentoring uh for them to understand as a person what like what I had to do with all this ship man is it made me realize like we said earlier when my father passed was that man how fucked up would have been if I wasn't ready, I wasn't ready to lose my dad obviously, but mentally versus a different state, how messed up would that be. And so it gives it gives a whole different perspective on where your mental health is before you can perform physically, before you can do just the minimal act of being a human, you know? Yes and there we have it part two of my 2.5 hour conversation with my man Damien Gilbert for the client corner.

If you enjoy the conversation and you took something away from this and you believe your friends and family can also benefit and make sure you pass it off to them. If you listen to this and you enjoy the conversation, please make sure you post it to your stories and tag both of us both are links will be in the show notes, any five star ratings and reviews are much appreciated guys, much love peace

Client Corner: Damian Gilbert part 2
Client Corner: Damian Gilbert part 2
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