Real Talk with Q. Alexander

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by Q. Alexander
November 20th 2022
Join me on this episode as I talk about people who treat people who hurt other people better than the people they have hurt. This must stop. Speak up and address the people who have done wrong instead... More
Hey, what's up everyone? This is Q Alexander. Welcome back to a new episode of my podcast, Real Talk with Q Alexander. I know it's been a while since I've recorded an episode. I have been extremely busy and focused. Um If you've been following me, you know that I am working on my second book as well as some other things. So I'm so excited to bring it all to you. So please look forward to it soon. Um I want to go ahead and get into a topic that I recently posted about on my Instagram page as well as on my Facebook page and it basically stated that some people need to stop treating the people who hurt other people better than the people, they have hurt. I see it time and time again where people are making excuses for the people who are mistreating others. For some reason, there's this hesitation that they don't want to believe that they are actually doing what they're doing, whether you're friends with the person or because you like them.

Um It's not fair to minimize what they've done to hurt others and in the process, you're dismissing the feelings of the people who have been hurt that is not ok or saying things like, well, what did you do for this person to hurt you? How about questioning those people and asking them? Did you do this? Why did you do this, you know, work on yourself because it's not ok. It's not right. You don't wait until you are the target of their behavior to all of a sudden, um, feel upset about it when you see other people being mistreated as a decent human being. If you are a decent human being, you should also be affected, try asking questions or saying things like are you ok? Is there anything that I could do? I'm sorry that this happened to you when people are already hurting, they're going through things, they're trying to get through it, they're trying to process it, they're trying to heal and get better. Obviously, they're already feeling bad about themselves or hurt.

So why would you say things that are only going to make them feel worse? I don't understand this twisted backwards, unhealthy, toxic thinking that a lot of people in this world have. If you listen to the episodes, the various episodes, a lot of the things I talk about when I talk about therapy and abuse and toxic behavior and relationships, all of those things tie in together. So there are a lot of people who are filled with a lot of negative stuff within themselves. So it doesn't have to be about what did someone do to cause it because no one has to do anything to people who have so much rage inside of them. It can take nothing or the smallest things to set them off because they are just looking for somewhere to dump it. They don't want to face it. They don't want to acknowledge it. They don't wanna deal with it. They don't want to heal. It's easier for them. And I mentioned this before. It's easier for them to just find someone some way to just lash out and that is extremely damaging.

It's unhealthy, it is wrong. I don't care how much you like a person. I don't care how long you have known a person. I don't care if it's your best friend. I don't care if it's family. It doesn't matter who it is wrong is wrong and people have to stop enabling this type of behavior. You keep on giving people a pass to disrespect people, to hurt people. And the more that you do that, the worse it's going to get because no one is holding them accountable. No one is checking them. You're still associating with them. People make mistakes but not when it's a pattern, not when it's a, a behavior pattern and it's a negative and it's harmful to other people. That's a choice and it's a bad choice. And if you are true friends with someone or family or however you are connected you need to say something about it. And if you see that it's not changing, it's continuing. You are no better than that person. If you continue to engage with that person because your actions are showing that you are accepting it, your actions are showing that it is OK.

And I don't associate with people like that. I don't care if it's 10 people going along with this and giving excuses and trying to justify that type of behavior. I will be that one person by myself standing up for what's right. I don't tolerate that type of stuff and I don't wanna be around people who tolerate that and think it's ok. I always say this, you really have to put yourself in other people's shoes and treat people how you wanna be treated. If you wouldn't feel ok if you are on the other side of things and you were being disrespected, mistreated, abused, you would want someone to listen to you. And that's why often times a lot of people suffer in silence, they don't say anything because of the fact of how backwards and upside down this world is and how they would rather take the side of the person doing wrong instead of the person who's actually hurting. That is not ok. So for anyone going through that just make sure that you have people who actually care about you in your corner and for the people who are doubting you or putting you down or being dismissive of your feelings.

You know that those are not your people, those are not people who truly care about you. So don't allow yourself to shut down and become angry. And then just basically repeat a pattern of what was done to you. Just find someone that you can talk to that shows genuine concern for you. Go to a therapist and and most importantly, talk to God, talk to God on a daily basis. I stress this so much because this is something that I really do in my everyday life. Talk to God, having God in your life and continuing that relationship. Not only when you're going through um hurtful times or you're angry or challenges, you have to do it on a daily basis, build that relationship with God and trust me, it will be so helpful to your life because you can trust God. He's not gonna change from day to day as many people do. He's not moody, he's not gonna be up and down. He's not gonna judge you. He's not gonna put you down. God will always be there for you. You just make sure that you give Him the respect and the praise on a daily basis for waking you up each day.

Thank Him during the good and the challenging times continue that relationship, whether things are up or whether things are down. So I just felt the need to speak on that. Um Again, it's something that I have experienced in my life and I have seen it happen to so many people. And is, is this never something that I will be accepting of? I will always speak up and again, stand on the side. That's right. It doesn't matter if it's directly happening to me. If I see something and it is not acceptable, it's hurtful to other people. It is important that we all learn to speak up and do what's right. So, thank you so much for listening. Thank you to all my listeners. Any new listeners that I may have, I am so grateful for everyone who has been listening and following and sharing my podcast. Um I will be back with another episode soon until then. As always, I am wishing each and every one of you peace and blessings.

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