This is episode 1 24 secrets to living an empowered life. You're listening to the Rise up and Shine podcast with Claudine and Ashley as an empty nester and a mom with young kids. We have both shared very similar and very real struggles from Chaos to coaches. We now help other women live an authentic and meaningful life. So tune in weekly for girl talk and tips on how you too can rise up and let your light shine bright. This is the Rise Up and Shine podcast. Welcome back listeners. I'm going to start us off with a scripture in first Corinthians 4 18 from the message bible, it says God's way is not a matter of mere talk, it is an empowered life and that's what we're talking about today. Empowered living Webster defines empowered as having the knowledge, confidence means or ability to do things or make decisions for oneself.

And last week we talked about the art of choosing and making choices, which is making decisions, but to have the confidence, the means and the ability and that's we're going to talk today about how to have an empowered life, how to live empowered, So empowered living. I love this topic because I remember my really transformation several years back when I worked through a lot of trauma from childhood and depression, anxiety and really steps, you know, crossed over into feeling much more empowered and just learning the tools on how to do that and especially with coaching, walking me through um so I want to share specifically about some thoughts that we might have things we say to ourselves that are actually disempowering for example, I can't do this. How many times have we said that? Or I am not good at this or I'm not good enough or I'm failing. Oh my gosh, I'm not doing anything well.

Um I don't have enough time. That's another one. It's one of my favorites. Yeah. We say that all the time. Not enough time in the day. I'm doing everything. I don't know if even if you're married have had that, had that thought in your own marriage that you feel like you're doing everything and your husband is not helping or your wife is not helping. And also if this happens then I'll be happier then I'll be able to do this or that if then mentality is also really keeps us stuck and disempowered in our lives for sure. Well, you know, I definitely went through a few years where I didn't feel empowered at all. I felt very disempowered. Like you shared and I would read these scriptures like the one I started off by reading and reading, It's an empowered life and I thought, you know, I don't feel any power here, I'm a believer, I'm a follower and where's my power and just felt like I got short changed somehow and didn't understand how the mind works. I didn't understand our thoughts and our feelings and our actions, how all those tie into each other.

Um and that I really did have the power, I did have the ability. What I was lacking at the time was the confidence because I didn't understand how to work and obviously that's what you and I teach our clients. That's what we work on is really empowering our clients to have the confidence to make the choices so that they can feel empowered, that they can live life to the full, that they can rise up and shine. Absolutely. I forgot one very important one on that list, Claudine that makes us feel disempowered. I should the ship is such a powerful word that dis empowers you. Let me tell you. And we still do it. We'll still find ourselves like, oh, I should be doing this instead, or I shouldn't have done that or I should have known better. I should, I should, I should, I should and we do that all the time. And it's so disempowering and really cuts us down. And again, I mean, we've had even an episode about self talk and that is huge on how we talk to ourselves. Can either empower us or Disempower us.

And a lot of time it does take away our power, right? We belittle ourselves. We criticize ourselves. We put ourselves down way too often. It just seems so natural and even I know in my own life and many out there who might be listening right now if you've experienced trauma in your life that also plays a big role in whether we feel empowered or not. And so if you've become a people pleaser or for myself, I was codependent on people and circumstances and you know if things go well then I'll feel good or this relationship goes well then I feel worthy or valued and gosh, we do that a lot. But again, that's giving our power over to circumstance right outside of us, right? Yeah. And that's very disempowering when we give our ability to to feel to have emotions, to act when we give it to other people. It's very disempowering and it's also very victim mindset. Very much so. Yeah, well I lived there.

Yeah, I did too. I just thought everything was going to be given to me and when it wasn't I just would get so discouraged, like, oh I guess I don't get a good life, I get this. So so mediocre life. But then I understood I learned the tools and the practical to really rise up and shine, which is why we try and share these things. But let's talk about how how can we feel empowered. Let's talk about some of the ways we've talked about the Disempowering thoughts, let's talk about some practical is to live empowered. So first off what we like to say cast the past, we have even held a workshop in this was one of our topics casting the past and what that means. Again, like I said, if you've experienced hardship and pain and discouragement and trauma in your life, you might be holding on to that and it could be disempowering to you. And like I said for myself personally, I was very much a people pleaser codependent. I cared way too much about other people's opinions and their view of me and I would have someone else's voice in my head, right, what I should be doing.

Yes. And sometimes it likes to come up again, but luckily we know the tools now what to do, which is why we're here to share it with you. But if you feel like I'm living for someone else, whether their approval or trying to make them happy, especially if you struggle with anxiety, That was a big one for myself as well. And depression and anxiety are signs that you could be, you know, you are you are disempowered if you're struggling with depression, anxiety, and you and I have both been there. So we know that and I love that that you shared cast the past because our past is not a prediction of the future, but our brain wants us to think that it is well this is the way it always goes, this is what's happened before. But honestly, the stimulus is not the same. So whatever happened in the past, it doesn't mean it's going to happen. The future, pardon my little dog who's visiting with us today in our recording studio. She's quite noisy, but that's so important to know that our past does not dictate our future because I really thought that I believe that it did.

And when we cast the past, when we push it aside and we, you know, we don't look back, even the bible teaches us don't look back, but yet we do that right. Our brains are um wired that way to take that past experience and go, oh, now it's a future predictor. This is what's going to happen. It is protection. And that's what our brains always want to keep us safe and keep us comfortable seeking pleasure. Safety comfort. That's how our primitive brains are wired. And unfortunately it does how upright it keeps us safe to a big extent. But unfortunately it keeps us stuck as well. Yeah, well and stuck from feeling empowered specifically in this category. Cast the past. If we are if we have said to ourselves or believe that well, my past has made me who I am. My past defines who I am. We tend to label ourselves based on experiences from our past and it's very disempowering, right?

We cannot feel empowered. We cannot live in that place if we are stuck from our past, right? And that's why this is so huge and there's so there's important things to let go. You know, it's not doesn't mean that we're condoning the situation or what this this person may have done to us or how we were treated. It's not accepting it, but it is freeing yourself and letting it go and allowing yourself to move forward, right? You're not being stuck in that place, still so held by the chains from your past, in in this place. Yes. Another empowering um practical is forgiveness. I know we talked about this a lot, but when we don't forgive someone again, we're giving them the power of how we feel, right, because they don't even know half the time they're going about with their life, but we're stuck with resentment and bitterness and anger. And if we don't forgive, we're the ones that what's that quote?

You know, you keep drinking the poison, it's like the other person is free, but you're you're suffering. And so forgiveness is another big one to live an empowered life and really being able to forgive those people that have genuinely done you harm. You know, clearly the scriptures teach all about that. Um we did do the power of an apology, but this is the other side of it. This is the power of forgiveness which we'll be doing in an upcoming episode, but really, forgiveness is a big one to live the empowered life, bitterness, resentment, right? Definitely? Disempowering. Yes, you cannot rise up and shine when you are full of those things and again, it is like you said, giving the power over to the other person and what they did, right? But we think that well if I forgive them, then I'm condoning what they did or accepting, like, well, okay, all is forgiven and you know, but that's not the heart of it. The heart of it is allowing yourself freedom to move forward and just accepting this is what happened.

Even if you didn't get resolution, I choose to forgive because it's in my best interest for their well being. Yes, absolutely. A third practical really is looking at our actions and we know we teach and we know that our actions are driven by our emotions which are created by our thoughts and you touched on this, but it's so important to manage our minds manage our mindset because if we don't, we will be disempowered, right? And we have to look at the thoughts and even deeper than thoughts our beliefs because a lot of us carry a lot of limiting beliefs that we were, that we learned in early childhood that were not even conscious of their unconscious and they're affecting our day to day life now. And that's why sometimes it's so helpful to have a coach or counselor someone to walk with us that helps us identify those limiting beliefs and those toxic thoughts. A lot of us had toxic conditioning, right? And you mentioned it earlier too, but that's not enough fill in the blank.

I'm not thin enough, pretty enough. Good enough, smart enough. You know how many right isn't that one that we say as women even as moms to be busier right now? I have the opposite. I was always too busy, I don't have enough time. But that's the thing is like we feel our place so much. I feel like I have to be busy because if I'm not busy I'm not productive. Yes. Yes, I'm lazy. Yeah. Absolutely. That's the western mindset. For sure. For sure. That's that's a toxic thought. I mean really nowhere does it say we have to be busy all the time. Very disempowering. And the fourth practical is just to remember whose we are right? We have the gift of the Holy Spirit. And I want to close out with this scripture Ephesians three verse 16. This is the N. L. T. Version. It says I pray that from his glorious unlimited resources, he will empower you with inner strength through his spirit. And I think that is so important because as we've talked talked about toxic thoughts and conditioning.

It's important to reframe those thoughts into truth, right? And what better source as from God himself, right? His truth and empower ourselves by filling ourselves up our minds up with positivity and his word and really trusting in the Holy Spirit working through our lives. So we really hope that this episode has helped you. We really desire you guys to live empowered and full of abundance in your life and rise up and shine. And that is why we are here And we also want to encourage you again that if you are looking, if you feel a little stuck, if you're looking for a little bit of extra help in your life to do just that. To live empowered then we want you to check out our web sites. It's Claudine Sweeney dot com and mind over chaos dot com and we are here, we would love to talk with you. We offer free discovery calls to see how things are going currently in your life and if you're feeling stuck or what area area or areas you would like to see growth in.

So we really appreciate you guys tuning in with us this week and we will catch you next time. Alright everyone, thank you for joining in on our conversation today here on the rice up and Shine podcast. If you haven't already, please take a second to hit that subscribe button so you never miss an episode and while you're at it share this episode with a friend who you know it can bless today if you want to visit us as well on our websites, you can catch Claudine over at Claudine Sweeney dot com and Ashley at mind over chaos dot com. Our links are in the description. We also have some free resources there for you as well. So remember ladies, no matter what you are facing in life, it is never too late to rise up and shine and live your best life