Disabled Girls Who Lift

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E22: DGWL Goes Live! Q&A Part I

April 24th 2020

It's quarantine for most of us, and let's be honest we're not really that chill. We're going live to take your questions and speak on all things disability & COVID-19. Together on one platform,... More

this is disabled girls who lift, We are reclaiming what's rightfully ours. One podcast at a time, it's mary Beth Chloe and Marcia bringing you the thoughts and unpopular topics to get you out of that a bliss comfort zone. Hey everyone. So we did a little something differently for this episode just in case you missed it. We hosted a live Q and A with some badass ladies from the disabled girls who left community and so we're providing you with that recording here. You know, we've been hearing or seeing lots of conversations on the internet and in the news about disability, health and safety, adaptability, fat shaming, food and medicine, rationing the importance of staying home. The importance of face coverings, unemployment, everything we thought it relevant. No necessary to continue the conversation from our standpoint. So here you are part one of disabled girls who left goes live. So hello, welcome guys, This is disabled girls who live goes live splat out.

This is Marsha uh from south florida. Today we're talking corona disabilities and more. You know, we're all here. There's about seven of us unfortunately are blue Chloe couldn't make it. So we're sending internet hugs out to her. Um, but you got us and you'll be happy. You'll love us. So moving on to our next Oh wait, actually, no, since just in case, just in case you're not familiar. I'm Marcy again, South florida Again, I am a powerlifting strong woman with an invisible illness. So yes, I might be shredded and yes, I might be strong but I am always sick, keep that in mind and we'll talk to our founder mary Beth next. Hey everyone, as some of you might know, I live in san Jose California. I am the founder of disabled girls who lived um I'm a competitive powerlifter, passionate advocate for adaptive athletes and Q. T. Pack athletes in the United States. I'm also a proud Filipina, disabled woman, queer woman.

Um I'm in the limb difference community so I am missing a few fingers our whole land. But I'm really really excited to be bringing these fantastically talented and bright women to the discussion As the largest minority group in the world. You know where one in seven people and in the United States alone were 19% of Americans. So although it's you know really difficult to relate to one another because everyone's disability is unique. We bring these types of platforms together representing disabilities of all kinds of uh personalities of all kinds and you know, just awesome, awesome women. So to get as many perspectives as possible. We wanted to bring some of our podcast guests back together on one platform, Talk about these topics from a firsthand experience. Uh some of you might recognize their voices. It is the first time we're showing our faces. So let's put a name to that face.

So um Kimberly D carol, she lives in san Jose California. She's a wife, mother of two boys, a massage therapist and a competitive crossfit athlete. She was diagnosed with retinitis pigmentosa, a degenerative degenerative eye condition in early childhood and is now totally blind. She was a wheel wad adaptive athlete and strives to encourage others with vision loss to chase their dreams. Then we got rose Hughes. Hi Rose Rose is a british chick living in Leuven Belgium. She has a bunch of chronic illnesses, autism and ptsD. She is super into fitness and even more into food. She uses her online platform to bring smiles to people's faces all whilst feeding them bite sized info in the hope to educate kris Sanda keith chris agenda is a strongman competitor and currently qualified as the second strongest adaptive woman in the world via static monsters.

She's finishing her PhD in criminology, law and society and lives for data analysis. She enjoys hiking, biking, kayaking and all strength sports, and also co instructs women's self defense with her boyfriend. She's allowed proud bisexual mexican adaptive athletes from California who strives to help others use exercise as part of treatment for chronic illnesses. And we've got Carly Web Carly is a journalist contributor with outsports dot com, a staff operator with trans lifeline and an organizer with the party for socialism and liberation. Centering on workers rights, trans liberation and anti war organizing in new Britain Connecticut. She's also a runner, cyclist, triathlete and really would rather be playing softball this spring than being quarantine, Don't we all last but not least Louisa Brown. Hey Louisa lisa is a professional photographer, PhD student, weightlifter, boxer, mother of twins and below the knee, left leg amputee living in Johannesburg South Africa.

Her message is all about living in a world where everyone needs to be perfectly put together, but she wants to bring across the message that we all are missing something in our lives, physically, mentally or emotionally. We have to adapt and run this race with perseverance. Welcome ladies. It's so awesome to have you live with disabled girls who lift good to be here. I've been here. Holla, lovely, lovely. Um so I guess we could start off talking. I mean, this is disabled girls who lift so we are no stranger to adapting. That's our life. We adapt, we thrive, we exist, we keep it moving, but the world is kind of not moving. So how does that work out? Are we adapting more? Are we changing things that we're doing? Are things different? Are things pretty much the same? I mean, I'll start for my, for me, I'm in south florida, we're sort of shelter and placing in a way, essential ship is still open.

I only leave the house on Fridays. I mean I'm sending my husband out to do everything, I'm spraying everybody down at the door, It's definitely weird, it's definitely different. So I'm curious to see what everybody has to do to maybe even adapt what they figured out something was working and now it doesn't, what are we supposed to do? Um, Crescendo where you at. So I'm in northern California just outside of go and just a little too far away from their best. And um, yeah, it's, it's weird. Um, I've never wanted to leave the house and look at door knob so much. Um, everybody here, I mean we're going to the mandated masks for the entire state and or at least for our county and um, my boyfriend's door dashing on the side to make some money because he works in the gym and they're closed and mm hmm. Very strange to see a lot of people not doing anything and not caring and then not respecting the fact that he's out there putting his life and my life and everybody in the house true.

Like at risk. He delivered some of these cheeseburgers and it's just, it's strange because we can't find anything to do. And I mean, we've taken the coloring in coloring books and all kinds of stuff, just trying to stay busy when you're so used to working out all the time and you don't have access to bar bell or anything. We don't have space for it. So I mean kind of sitting around getting soft now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But as far as daily stuff, you know, daily stuff that you're doing for treatment or if you need medication or you need to do follow ups or Even just three shopping I scott I must be in hand to switch primary care doctors in the middle of covid. So I mean, I've never even met my primary care doctor and it wasn't, I didn't really televise it, but I have got a lump in my breast a couple of weeks ago and had to deal with that while trying to stay away from people and had to go through the mammograms and ultrasounds and it's just day to day stuff.

You just don't want to do it and then I want to make sure that people understand that. That's okay. You can do nothing and that's okay. There's no there's no set plan of what you need to do. So I'm kind of one of the few that not working out and not really finding other coping mechanisms that I had. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's probably, I mean, sure there's like the level of people that are like, I don't know who I am if I'm not, you know, doing whatever my sport is. But there's also the level of that, that was the way that you dealt with stuff. You were mad, you're anxious, you're whatever with the sorrows of the world and you go hit that Barbara and you were like, all right, I'm good now, but you you can't do that. Yes. And it hurts and it hurts a lot more than I think I had expected and I'm not quite sure what to do with that energy. So it's been a lot of bed rest and a lot of paying off of social media and coloring and coloring books really has been my outlet and what I love, what I really love about this community is we're really like reminding each other that it's okay not to be productive, it's okay to, you know, stay in bed and not do anything on a monday for the first time in your life or find something separate from what you were training so hard to do for competition and like for me, I started my own garden, I never had a green thumb holy ship and you started your own garden to write, finding our own ways to cope or taking longer walks than we used to that and accepting that like I've got competition coming up and accepting that you know, I am not going to be my best and that's okay.

I, a lot of people have access to a home gym and I don't and I found some creative ways to do some exercises, but it especially because the store manager is not quite the same, so it is what it is and you just kind of expected to move on and on top of that every, if you even wanted to start your own home gym, everything's sold out, you know, there's a high influx of people wanting to start their own home gyms, there's hardly any access, I know some people are trying to make their own out of cement, you know, but how's it working for everyone else? Are you taking this adapting to isolation and immobility or infection susceptibility. Like are you doing anything different this time? I'm honestly like discovering that I said this to my dad yesterday, I think I should have recorded the noises from my local gym, including like the grunts and just like getting a small chain of gyms because I'm training at mine and like thoroughly enjoying it because I live on my own and it's quite very nice.

But that's the thing that's lacking is it doesn't it's not a gym because it doesn't sound like one and I'm not bumping into everyone and I'm not waiting for the bench to be free. Um But in some ways it's been quite nice because I'm like not having to like really overthink it. Uh and I don't have that like pre jim anxiety that I always have to deal with. Like I think everyone has it like the 20 minutes of do I go I'm not in the mood. I don't feel like people today that's all gone because it's just me and my house rabbit. Yeah, that's a good point. You don't have to deal with that part. Um kim what about you? You still you still look like you have some sort of home gym situation. Wait, hold on, you're muted. No. Oh she's good now. Start over kim. I I actually feel like, well I know I have more free gym anxiety now that I'm working out at home, which you would think that I would be more comfortable in my own home than at the gym, but um I am definitely not, it's gotten a lot better as you know, I've just had to get used to it, but I am so used to and so grateful for always having other people's eyes on me at the gym, my coaches, my friends, my husband, you know, I get turned around at the gym and boom, somebody is there to turn me back around, face me in the right direction, bring me my things and um now I wake up super early a lot of times and go out into my garage and I get so turned around in my own dang garage that all it takes more time to work out and I'm nervous and you know, I've had to really take the time to stop and say to myself like, don't get frustrated, if you only do this much, then you only do this much and and I do feel lucky that I do have a home gym, right, so many people do not, but it has been very hard and I, I have joked with, you know, one of the coaches saying, you know, if I just had your voice recorded, it'd be no different for me, like because I can't see anybody at the gym anyway, but but for me, you know, having people is so important, people's touch people's energy and I've also, and I never I never get really down or depressed and during this time I've had to really go through, you know taking care of my emotions in that just not having that, I'm not a visual person.

So now these zoom meetings, all these Skype calls, I feel still so disconnected because I don't see what everybody else is seeing and not having that energy of actual human, it is hard for me. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense, I could definitely get that, so it's like a different level of discomfort, you know, for us, we're thinking we're uncomfortable because it's like oh what am I gonna wear? Somebody gonna judge me if I take my shirt off or am I gonna have to deal with the gym bro? But I mean you're like the opposite where you're like okay uh my coach isn't gonna be there to make sure I don't hit my head on the bar bell. Um Yeah, like interesting perspective actually, like I'm glad you said it because it's not crossed my mind and it's like the polar opposite of my situation. Yeah, and I feel just because of the past month being um kind of locked away from everybody, even just in day to day things, I'm finding myself more disoriented and even in my own home and I and I think it's just, you know, the breaking of my routine, all this change of, you know, the ones of us have kids that they're around, they're trying to figure out school for them.

So for me that change of total routine, it makes me end up walking into walls. It's it's just bizarre. And from what we know, you've got a 12 year old son who helps you a lot to write, who you actually captures video for you. I know he's so good, I'm so lucky to have him and my eight year old, they are great. And you know, we talked about all these rumors going around that the new normal is going to be zoom and internet and I'm like panicking, thinking, oh no, please, no, because as wonderful as technology is and how far it's come for accessibility for visually impaired people, There's still a long way to go. Even my struggles yesterday with, with setting all this up, you know, there's There's still a lot lacking for doing things independently. And I am lucky to have 12 year olds and eight year olds, but you know, sometimes they want to do their own thing and not, you know.

Mhm. But we're doing our best, right? Yeah, what else can we do? Um How about you Louisa? What's what are things like in South Africa or how are you adapting or you get you're doing whatever you need to do or you're just stuck, how is it moving one second? Go ahead, You got me unfortunate to grab my own drum at home um I've actually just said that my photo studio where I just get it all the weight in the bars and things in there and so I started working out but like him said, you know the people, the communication, the interaction, you know, um even though you might think that you know that weird dude might be looking at you, you sort of kind of, yeah, because I think that's the kind of thing that motivates you to show the guys that you can do what they can do.

Um you know the, the solitude was okay like for a couple of days I enjoyed my own company because I would go in there, I would blast the music and I would lift, you know, I have this big mother there as well and I would lift, but then eventually there's something missing missing and it just shows you how we've become dependent on other people on, you know, um on company on having people around you and like him also said um you know, you, you missed the voices, you missed the grants especially you must just that song, just the ambiance that is there just the, you know the feel I guess the smell as well, you know, interacting with different ages unfortunately because I'm in South africa. Um you know, there's, there's different race types in my gym so there's a lot of black people, we have colors, we have female, we have male, we have old, we have young and so the interaction is quite interesting every day.

You know we had our daily routine where we would um you know who you're gonna greet and you know you follow up on your discussions and you follow up on house their family and how that's doing. So the solitude side of it, the isolation side of it is a little bit sad for me um but I mean I'm not letting that get in the way of still wanting to stay fit, still pushing for goals that we that I have set for myself um and I'm just thankful that I can jump at home as far as sanitizing and trying to clean everything, keeping everything clean, keeping everything just um sanitized. You know we were doing good, the family is doing good. I've got twins, like my like like you've introduced myself, I have teenage twins, we'll keep themselves very busy. They are athletes as well, 16 year old gymnast, so you can imagine the adrenaline and the testosterone happening in this house.

So so yeah, but we keep active, we try and release the frustrations and the stress not on one another, but the ions work. Um we'll go outside and we'll play with the dogs, we love dogs, we love animals and you know at the end of the day, just just come together as a family and then just sort of watch tv enjoy a movie um you know just interact and and just try and make the best of it. I know it's not gonna last forever. That's one thing that we that you know that we're certain of but we're just trying to stick together as a family and just watch out and see what's happening out there in the world. As sad as it is. We are really fortunate that we are the ones who are outside of the hospital and we are still healthy and we are still fit and um we can do as much as we can. Um I've paid cupboards, I've unpacked draws I've really acted re stacked you know just to keep busy things that that we've postponed over the years and there was always excuses that we can't do this and we can't do that and so you know that the cleaning side doesn't stop but we just tried yes cleaning out.

It's it's unbelievable the boarding that's been happening. So how long has the shelter in place been? You know active in South Africa how your kids have been out of school for a while now it's been four weeks people in the area. Yeah just about a month now. Um fortunately we have online training so what the school does we have like a D. Six communicator. Um And what the school does is teachers will just um upload all their lessons and assignments that they need to do and then so they set time aside during the day so they can go through that um you know, still still keeping busy and still trying to educate themselves and do what they have here and then submit that at the end of the day, so so it's not that bad, but I do think they miss their friends and they do miss school life, but we have to work with between. Yeah, of course. So one thing um one thing someone asked us because you all know this is a Q. And A. Live, so we're gonna get lots of questions from the audience and some of our followers, but um some people are having trouble with food and medicine rationing.

You know, some of us have chronic illnesses, some of us can't afford to Overstock on what toilet paper, canned foods, other things that you've seen gone missing flower. Uh does anyone have any tips for managing grocery store anxiety? Um If if it's different in your location, please let us know going really early in the morning. Like I've been making a stupid mistake of thinking people won't go and here in Belgium, I've got some pretty strict measures in place, but you can still go to the grocery store like you know every day. Um And I had been going like around the middle of the day, you know when you have enough energy which is like middle of the day. Uh And the queues were just crazy long and I would arrive and it's quite far as well. So I'd have like I'd be like throwing a bit of a tantrum because I'd be like I just walked all the way here. Um but there was just so many people and even though they're all they are keeping respective distance and there is like hand sanitizer everywhere and they're they're they're like cleaning your trolley for you or your cart.

Sorry? Ah It's just the amount of people and knowing that they're physically going to be in the store and like I just don't trust anyone And also the waiting outside like I don't know about you guys but like I'm not about standing up for that long in a situation like that. So I end up just like turning and doing a 180 and kind of going fine, I'll go for a walk and come back. But I definitely think going early or like nowhere near before closing because it seems everybody goes at that time. So they've minimized your capacity that's for sure. But I know some of our stores are they're offering like a nine a.m. To 10 a.m. Like senior our you know where people over 60 can come and stop in peace. Have you seen some of that happening in your area doing that, where I live, there are they're doing they are doing that where I live um there's a lot of stories that are doing that. The the interesting thing is when they're doing it that time is usually from like 66 A.

M. To eight a.m. And a number of places. So when the stores are pretty much open, when the stores are opening up That first two hours you have to be over 60 to get in than everybody else. And like um a lot of lot of queuing up a lot of it. Uh Strange enough the longest queues I've seen have been at Starbucks. I mean you have cars lining up three blocks down the way that because you know you just gotta have that gotta have that Starbucks fixed in the morning. Not me necessarily but a lot of people it's just been a matter. I mean grocery stores have have have drastically changed. Um There's everything is a one way aisle in one way or another to try and limit the traffic flow. Keep the soul the social distancing as they call it. Which is I'm still trying to wrap my head around why exactly that term. But yeah it's been here where I live in Connecticut. It's been, I'll put it this way.

Any talk of trying to quote unquote reopen the country by May one is something straight out of cloud cuckoo land and that and that is what you're seeing. At least where I'm living in the northeast where we have not reached the we have not even reached the apogee of this first outbreak yet. I mean for example in Connecticut. The cases are have been increasing by an average of 180-200% a week And the death toll has unfortunately average increases of roughly 161 and 70% a week. I again, I say any any hopes of opening the country up at one May is serious fantasy land. Yeah, it's not gonna go that well. We're we're also in that same boat where they're not letting more than a certain amount of people in the stores. So they have to wait outside the store and then you can go in and like you said, it's the one ways and the whatnots. And to answer the question about how to handle the anxiety.

I mean luckily for me, I'm just making somebody else do it. That's my, that's my answer. And if you don't have, if you don't have a partner or a brother or whatever, then this is where you try and find, you know cash in on those internet instagram friends and find out who's by you and see if you could get someone to give you a helping hand because I do know people that have done that as well. They live on their own. You know, they're not in the same state as their family, but you know, they, they put put a little story up on instagram. Hey, can somebody get me some vegetables and somebody did. So you know, you can't be afraid to ask for the help when you need it. And this, this is definitely the kind of time where we have to put that and people want to help and nobody is super busy, so people do want to help and they're grateful to help. And if you even casually ask, it seems like people are just willing and wanting, you know, or Mhm.

I haven't been in the store since this whole thing started, which is weird. But yeah, I've been very lucky. Yeah, in general, like on a personal level, I don't even, I hate grocery stores shopping. So I stick to, I stick to the delivery, that's my bread and butter, but the delivery is packed right now. So, you know, somebody actually has to leave the house and shop, but in general I skip it. It's too much work. It's hot outside and go from my car. I gotta go inside by the time I remember everything, it's like three hours. I'm tired as hell. That means when I get home I'm not doing anything. There's no more spoons left, so I just never mind grocery shop. But now it's just hmm, now I do want to send a shout out to, to a group. I work with Connecticut mutual aid, my background behind me. Um I've been working with a number of, I've been working with a number of mutual aid cadres in our state. And now those cadres are being coordinated. We're working together. We're communicating together and things are starting to get done for a lot of people for a lot of people statewide.

And I just want to I want to throw them a quick shout out because I mean, we're up here, one thing we've learned, one thing we've learned is we have to we have to depend on neighbor to neighbor because the state because the state can't do everything and the current regime in Washington is looking to do nothing. So it's gonna be so if it's if it's to be it's going to be up to all of us helping our neighbors out and that and for me, I found by helping out that's helped deal with the depression, that's helped deal with the frustration that help deal with anxiety because at the moment as as a sign in one of our local parks where I like to go run says, I mean, it says social says social distance is important, hashtag it's not about you. And that's the thing we're keeping by keeping the focus on other people by keeping the focus on helping others. It also helps us it can help us get through it. Mhm. Yeah, that's a good point and it's so important bringing up community because with, you know businesses closing down, it's been over a month, a lot of small businesses can't stay afloat now or when we come back from this.

So one you can't really, you're filing for unemployment, but you've got to wait a number of weeks to get approved if you want to get you know funding for WIC or cal fresh here in California, the application process is getting longer because everyone is applying. So um what I've seen a lot more our food drives here in my area and everywhere else where if kids can't get meals because they've stopped school or parents can't get meals because they are not working like come and pick up your meals to three times a week because there's no funding right now and it's just it's really tough but it is amazing seeing these relief funds sprout from nowhere and it it exists if you if you need that please let us know. Um Let's see yeah in terms in terms of of um community and that sort of thing, do you guys know of a lot of local things that are happening or you're are you guys doing anything or you guys getting help from anyone or you know your personal friends or family doing things that we know about Connecticut Connecticut is coming through.

Um What about these other areas? I have to say like I can be quite a negative nancy about Belgium. Uh But like so I think we're going into our seventh week since the lockdown started. Um And there have been like multiple situations where either like my family or my friends or someone has said like that they don't have access to something, something that's really like difficult is whether or not you go to the doctor with like a regular issue now, like not corona related but put yourself at the risk. Um so they have, they do have a lot, like, I don't know everything because I don't necessarily check Flemish or french news that religiously. Um, but for example, like when this all kicked off, I did put on my instagram story and my facebook that I like social media that I, um, that my parents were self isolating and that neither of them had gone to like a store or like really left the house in like six weeks, especially because my mom is so vulnerable. My mom's also chronically ill. Um and instantly the amount of people that like popped up on my phone, it was quite emotional because I was like, I had no faith that anyone would want to like go to this village in the middle of nowhere, but loads of people popped up and then eventually a friend dropped off a load of groceries to my parents and I was like, you have no idea how much that means to me because like you're doing such a solid for a situation where like I did, I felt so helpless because I can't help and they can't do it.

It's like, you know what can you do? But there are loads of really cool like initiatives and stuff flying around Belgium that are just kind of like adorable. I was going around on like one of my runs and I kept seeing teddy bears in people's windows and I was like okay, it's cute but like why is everyone doing this and why didn't I know? And then everybody, like, I've never had this many D. M. S. In my instagram like that and everyone's like yeah it's this thing called the Bear hunt and I'm like I know what a bear hunt is. Um but they're doing it so that like every day you take your kids out for exercise and they have to like walk around not touch anything but just be like, oh look a bear and count how many bears they can find. Um I think that's really cute cause they go home and they tell their friends over like whatever the equivalent of msn is that they have now They come and they say I saw nine beds today and then the other person's like I saw 11, so it's just really like these little things already cute um and they help distract you because I think there's just so much negativity being said that this stuff really brightens my day, like the smallest thing that probably would not have made me smile in the past, but like you wouldn't have even noticed before.

Yeah, actually like I've heard too, I've heard to that um is really nice that people when they're going on their walks, they're writing messages on the sidewalk, the sidewalk chalk. So then positive message is uplifting messages so that, you know, people can write and respond and write something else and I've heard that going on really nice, cute. It's good for kids. Yeah, kids need a lot of, I mean this is the time where they're used to doing A B and C. And everything's kind of all over the place so it they can get pretty unsettled. Um I don't have any kids, but I do work with kids and you could just, you know, I'm going to where I work and not all the kids are there only the kids whose parents have to work and they're like, oh I miss so and so where is he? Oh I miss so and so where is everybody, why are you doing that so much? You know, they're just like what is going on? You know, and when you're not when you're busy being depressed yourself or trying to deal with how the funk are my parents gonna get groceries yourself and all these things that we're all dealing with.

I can only imagine it could be so confusing for the little ones. Yeah. And with all these holidays coming through, you know, I was just telling my partner this country, this world is lucky that it's not happening during thanksgiving christmas time because everyone would just blow their minds, but how, you know, I'm seeing kids handle celebrating their birthdays, they're doing drive byes of their friends, you know, with signs and balloons driving through their block or you know, just really amazing things in the community and, and a reason to get out of the house, but not really physically interact has been really nice. Yeah, it gives you the sense of community without spreading any contagion, which is number one. But as far as community goes though, I will say the, the negative thing about community that I've seen um from the fitness world mostly, or maybe like anyone that's sort of wellness e is that there's so many like really, really annoying fat jokes.

Like I'm sorry if the worst thing that you could think of coming out of a worldwide pandemic is that you put on some weight, just don't say anything at all, just I don't understand it. It absolutely lose my mind. I think it's because people are so used to their routines and so used to whether it is going to the gym every day or going and doing whatever. I think just the change in our teen, whether or not the scale is even moving, we're just so uncomfortable with ourselves, we're so uncomfortable with the change in our surroundings, which makes us feel like we're lazy or blah and yes, I do think people shouldn't put it up on necessarily social media, but that is kind of also a sign to maybe reach out to that person and ask how they're doing because it might not actually have anything to do with their weight, it might just be more that they're feeling really shitty and you know, I think, you know, we're so used to having our community to pump us up, make us feel great and we just don't have that, especially in crossfit.

I mean isn't that what it's all about? It's the Crossfit people, we drink the kool Aid, we're in this weird cold. It's but those are our people that were with every day. And so yeah, we we do feel for a lot of people feel out of shape and things like that. So I do think it's more about an insecurity than an actual scale. I can see what you mean in the terms of in terms of how society views, you know, disabled disabled is bad in terms of how trans folks view things trans That's weird. That's bad. You know, in terms of bodies like fat is bad. Alright, I feel bad alright. Make fun of fat people. Like it's just like I think that that like down the line like I could I could see what you mean, like you know, there are people that say racist things and you might tell them like yeah, that was kind of off what you said and they think about and they're like, all right fine. And you know, there are people that say fat phobic things and you're like, yo you gotta chill and then you tell them about and they're like, oh, I don't really think that's not what I meant. Well, I was just thinking more about people feeling about themselves, not about other people.

The one that makes me crazy though. Yeah. When they say, make sure you put on your jeans once a week to make sure they still fit. Those are the ones that I'm like, excuse me, no. Away. Is that how people live in? And that's how we're living? It's bad, it's bad enough that people are shaming lizzo right now. Again, over the over this thing, over that thing, did he was trying to put together to raise money for coronavirus and basically, and basically said, no, we don't want lizzo there because Lizzo is too much of a loose cannon. No, because Lizzo probably was still your show. Seriously? Oh, no, they've been on her. No. See that's one that's what I've been doing a lot during this, during this crisis, I've been doing a lot of working out listening to her music. It has pushed me through a lot of morning runs. Let me tell you. But no, it's it's there seems to be in many ways and I find myself falling into that falling into that trap of I'm not doing enough, I'm not doing anything when when the fact is I have three jobs, but the fact is I have three jobs and I'm and I'm I'm grateful that I'm still working through this thing, a lot of people aren't.

A lot of people weren't. But even so you get that feeling like you're not doing enough and there are times I have to back myself cloth and say, you know what today, you're gonna sit with your roommates and you're going to binge watch Batwoman, that's what you're going to do. You're not going to think about anything you're doing, you've done work, you're doing work, you're helping out just go, I think in a sense that's one thing about this time is that hopefully people are taking a lot of people are saying they are taking that step back and I hope so and I hope so. I hope that because I mean for the most part we I mean no matter where you're at in this earth everybody, it seems like more and more people on that hustle on or on that hustle even more so now, especially when you got when you got people knowing knowing the risk, but they're getting out there and they're driving, they're driving that Uber, they're driving that lift. They're doing whatever they can to just try to just scratch it out and no, I need to speak on this real quick.

A lot of people are hyped up about the $1,200. But when I look at what Say Canada is doing what I look at what a lot of Western europe is doing what I look at what a lot of other countries are doing to take care of people and to give people a safety net during this crisis. I'm like really, really you can keep your you can keep your trump chump change to yourself when you really look at people. I mean people need help right now, a lot of people need help right now and I'm sorry Once again and I hope to things I hope that come from this. No one people realize that when when you hear people say we don't have money for needed services don't buy it because they find it because they they found that they found $2 trillion 30 minutes. And secondly, I think it's cool that people are going out and they're applauding, you know, like the first responders and you're and you're plotting your health service people and you're all of a sudden saying that that person working the cashier at the local quickie markets, you're here hero all well and good.

But let's say when we come to the end of this and for example, here in Connecticut, the nurse, the nurses lou the nurses union here, their collective bargaining agreement ends in the fall, they got to renegotiate. Now if they walk out, I wonder how many people all of a sudden go and turn the other way and say you ain't heroes no more, y'all greedy or when when those people at the grocery store have to have to go, have to fight over their collective bargain agreement, fight for their benefits and go on strike. Like one of the, like one of the major chains did here last year. Yeah, I hope that people don't forget who they were applauding and yeah, I'm also gonna also gonna mention real quick Rose's home country, all you people that are applauding the NHS when that Tory government starts cutting the NHS, I expect you to get in the faces of some mps. Yeah, that's a good point. So there's people that are, have too much time and instead of dealing with their feelings of insecurity or whatever, they go and make fun of the others the US is um so I do want to circle back on that for a second because I know christendom has her fair share of trolls.

So if all these trolls are home, I'm wondering if it's gotten worse. Yeah, I was kind of waiting to kind of circle back. I feel like they really got off topic there. Um and this is a topic that's really important because saying that it's an there's not an excuse for it saying, oh it's just, it's an internal thing. Oh, I I'm feeling lazy. That's that's not a good excuse, that's, that's done. Would you say that if you were like, oh, I felt lazy today, I was feeling like a mexican. I mean, yeah, these, these are like at the court, these are offensive ideas and people are, are saying things in joe ingest without realizing that what you're saying is actually really fucked up and explaining it away and immediately equating saying immediately going towards his own being like, oh well I talked about her music all the time and equating that only with fat phobia is so reductive and it's been happening a lot.

You can't Differentiate one from the other and that's not how it's supposed to be. I'm not going to try and talk about each person in here and say, oh well this person has this person is a limb, has a limb issue or Mhm So wait, I'm sorry. So you're saying people are, you've heard people kind of using like I listened to lizzo, like that's their token fat friend basically. Okay, token and you can't see too pull her music or herself away from the fat phobia and she's more than her body. And I feel like that's happening more and more often is we're immediately going towards talking about one specific body as opposed to a body of work and it's becoming frustrating because I mean, just look at us here, we all kind of went out of our way to look a little nicer to be on camera.

And so as females in the spring community, not only are we expected to look decent, we're expected to be a certain way and we do that to ourselves, but also allowing the community to just explain it away of oh well I feel fat today now, that's just an internal thing. It's just it's frustrating because it happens more more than that, especially in my division. You end up with people saying, well of course you can live that much. I mean she's two times heavier than I am, so of course you can look two times as many as much as me or I need my own um section for us, little small people because it's just not fair and it's just everything has to be reduced and explained away by weight and it's becoming a little repetitive. Yeah, it's an old conversation. Yeah. And this and in this time of discomfort, like you should know how to change your language and mindset around it.

Like why why do you need it? Make poke fun at? Even if you're just poking fun at yourself, Like you you aren't fat, honestly you weren't fat, you probably didn't have a pound or two. But jesus christ Yeah, and Carly, I'm wondering so Christina gets a lot of trolls on her stuff. I'm wondering if you experience that, you know, as a trans woman, people always in your in your business and your I don't know whatever social media you're on, if that's gotten worse better or the same or if you feel any transphobia in general now that people have a lot of time on their hands is worse, better or the same and muted. It's interesting you say that because what was once, I mean, it's funny, we're in the middle of this crisis right now and this crisis has people I care about in quarantine at the moment. And it's funny you had you had something like what, nine states in this union at the start of this crisis who In the middle of having something that they something that they need to be working on, which is dealing with COVID-19.

But instead they were taking time out of all the important things that need to be done to try and pass bills that that basically made discrimination legal and one state did it. Idaho passed two bills at the last day of their session. One that essentially one that that essentially says if you're trans in Idaho, you cannot get your gender markets change. And the other one is if you're a high school kid who wants to play sports in your trans, we have the right to check your pants That HB 500 and HB 509 both got passed and they were and the governor went ahead and signed both. So, so governor brad's shame on you that I've seen a lot of that. And of course there, I mean it's some, it's been ongoing. It's been about the same. But during this time I'm surprised that it hasn't stopped, hasn't like dial back a little bit because we've got, we've got a bigger conversation to talk about right now, which is kind of like keeping a lot of people alive as much as we can.

But the transphobia is there, it's still out there. Once again, you're hearing the same old tired stuff about don't let don't let those trans kids play sports, don't let them play sports. And it's like I said on the podcast, like on the podcast two or three weeks ago, the one thing that people have to realize is that whole issue is not about sports, That real issue is about eraser and they're doing. And that's another thing during this crisis, so many things are going through our body politic right now that are targeting all sorts of, all sorts of community, all communities in many ways and people aren't paying attention because right now the focus is on quote, covid, but instead of fighting Covid to the fullest letter to the red line, they're doing things such as we're gonna they're doing things. For example, there's a bill going through Congress right now to water down a D.

A some more now. What kind of ignorance is that A bill that has worked in this country? Not perfect, but it's worked in this country for 30 years and has given a lot of people opportunity and now you want to water it down and and you want to water it down and debase its functions and more. It's pathetic. And the sad part is they're doing it while they think nobody would notice because we're also caught up on trying to survive. You know, trying to feed our families, they're still passing these bills on discrimination. They don't think we'd notice. And our job's to keep that voice loud, keep it going. And another point is for everyone they are, this is an example of if nothing else, this whole crisis is an example of why you need universal healthcare. This right here is why you need it. And this is why people need to be after it's over and we can go back out in the streets, we need to be marching in the streets, wearing out shoe leather and getting in a lot of people's faces because what there because this is showing what happens, not just for marginal.

I mean, a lot of people talk about, we talk about marginalized communities, well, guess what? You're all damn marginalized now, all of you, if you didn't think you were marginalized, but there's there's a very good article in the root a couple of weeks ago where people are realizing where a greater majority of the society are realizing the way that marginalized communities have always had to navigate, navigate in society. And if you get a chance, I'm gonna find it and I'm gonna put that link in there and I want people to read it because that's what that's why you're seeing people acting a fool with guns in michigan right now because they're they're finally getting a taste of what black folks have had to go through. What brown folks had to go through, go through their getting a taste of what trans people have to go through their getting a taste of what disabled people go through, especially the health care system. So well a lot of people, I mean, I I saw one full carrying a sign saying my body, my choice, open up the country.

How ironic is that? How ignorant there's there's a whole move over baby, whole lot of ignorance going on in this country right now. Thank you if you made it this far, that was part one of disabled girls who lift goes live and part two is in the next episode Before moving on to part two. I want to remind you that our narratives are experienced and our opinions might be different from your own as well as your neighbors take your time. If you need to heal from the stresses of these types of conversations, just as much as taking a break from the news, take your time If you find yourself demotivated from working out or quote unquote eating right, please prioritize your and your family's mental and physical health. Maya Angelou said something I will never forget since time is the one immaterial object which we cannot influence. Neither speed up nor slow down adds to nor diminish it is an imponderable e valuable gift.

So with that, take advantage of this time to love those near you, including yourself only. You know what makes you happy and what tools you need to survive. I know we've made it our responsibility to play our part in the world. Speak up act or protests when we need to and even abide by the rules like sheltering in place or wearing a face mask, but when it comes to taking care of yourself and your body, make sure you do that first. So thank you again for listening. Listen to Part two when you can. We've also linked the Youtube video in the description if you want to watch us full and in the flesh, closed captioning is available on Youtube. If you click on the CC button on the bottom right, we have more transcriptions for podcasts, episodes coming. Please forgive us while we catch up. If you're interested in helping us transcribe. Send us an email at disabled girls who lift at gmail dot com. If you need someone to talk to ever send us a message anytime. Thanks for listening to disabled girls who left.

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E22: DGWL Goes Live! Q&A Part I
E22: DGWL Goes Live! Q&A Part I
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