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Coaches Corner: Goal, Process, and Identity based approaches to achieving your desired results

by Shaun Kober
December 28th 2020

 I've had so many great conversations with friends and colleagues about what we see happening in the fitness industry, and thought to myself, "I wish we would have recorded that." More

what does it mean to live life to the fullest train to your potential and perform at your best, Leave nothing on the table. That's a non negotiable is that I strive to be better every day because if I'm not on top of my game, how is anybody else gonna follow me down the road? Keep demanding more of yourself to live up to that potential and to stay hungry. Training is progress. You know, when I look at the word training, I think of steps, baby steps to get somewhere that you want to be and that is basically your life journey. That's a mindset in itself, man, It's like, it's not just about, I know that for you, a lot of that's about the physical, but we're constantly in training, whether it's growing our skill sets, whether it's growing up physical bodies, whether it's growing our relationships, whatever and all of that is a training ground and that kind of goes back to the mindset that we just talked about. You underestimate yourself and you don't even start. But then once you start, you often surpass what you thought you could do perform at your best mate. That's, that's sort of what life is all about. You don't have the knowledge and have the fitness, the healthy ambition and drive that no matter what comes along.

When that next phone call comes, I can just say yes, I don't have to worry, just go and do it. You know what is up guys, welcome to this second installment of the coach's corner episode with john Latoc of Storm Force fitness. This is an 80 minute conversation that have split up into a couple of episodes, the first episode being some common mistakes that we see with clients when they first reach out to start working with us. Uh I've really dropped that episode which came out the day before Christmas and that is entitled, are you actually ready for coaching? So go back and listen to that episode before you listen to this one because a lot of the answers will carry over into this episode as well. Will be referring to some of the comments that we made in the first episode. Alright, during this episode, we look at a couple of different approaches for goal setting and implementation. So we're looking at a goal based approach of writing down your goals. Then we're looking at a process based approach which is basically the roadmap that's going to get you to your goals.

And then we also discuss an identity based approach which is essentially aligning your goals and your roadmap with your underlying values. Let's get this episode underway. When it comes to the approach you're gonna take. I say there's like three ways of doing this, you can take a gold based approach, you can take a process based approach and you can take an identity based approach. And for me, the problem we have these days is most people have a goal based approach and the Oh I see, I see codes on the internet and he's got a six pack, I want to look like that. Great. That's a good start. But then what it does to me that that kind of creates like this massive gap like I'm here, I should be here. I can't be happy until I get to that golden. There's no understanding of what's happening in between. There's no management process or so on. So there you go. Okay, well what about if I pay copes for a program and that will get me kind of through those steps. I now have that process in place. The problem with that is like you said, then what happens when the conditions changed and this is something that happens massively in january, you know, we write first week of january, I might even still be off work.

I'm just gonna train twice a day and eat cabbage and do all this sort of stuff. And then once we get into work again and those stresses and the kids are back at school and I got to do the school run as soon as the environment changes. Now that magic process doesn't work. Do you have a way to navigate around it again? It's an old army term? No plan survives contact with the enemy because everything looks good on paper. So the third approaches that I like to try and instill in people and this relates back to who you choose the coaches, the value based approach, where you, you understand who you want to be. You understand how you want to live, you understand what to do on a daily basis and you then it means every minute of the day, every incident that comes up, every problem you come up against you put it up against your values and that's how you can then make the correct decision. And really that's the big secret to getting results is I can walk into a pub and I know what I'm trying to achieve and I can go, ok, I can have a couple of points Because I understand my values.

I understand that I want to get up at 7:00 tomorrow morning and train. Whereas somebody who walks in a pub is like, oh, I've got my fitness plan, but I have I have no frame of reference for what to do in a pub. I have no frame of reference of what to do when I'm stressed. And that comes back to that clarity. Exactly. But this and and dude, like man, we've we've literally fucking gone full circle and this is why we asked those questions in that original fucking email that we send to people is because I guarantee you they're not asking themselves those questions, like almost every client that I've sent that email they write back and I'm like, I've never actually thought about this stuff. It's like, all right, well now we're giving you clarity. I'm guiding you to figure out your own fucking answers. So then you can provide that information to me so then I can put you in the right direction. This is a lot of finds whether it is a guy wanting to put on muscle, maybe wanting to lose weight. They're always coming to us based on, it's almost like a tipping point.

Something has happened externally, Even even looking in the mirrors, they've seen something externally as I can't tolerate anymore. Maybe. Uh, they said they've seen something on the internet, they walking around tiger muay thai and they see Petr Yan and I want to be that guy. It's always like an external stuff and that's what I mean about, it's a, at first it's a gold based approach which isn't necessarily a problem. Obviously goals are important, but they have no idea about their personal values and that is important for joe average because if he comes in and I say, okay, well based on your goals, if you train twice a day and I want you to eat six meals a day and so on, that may well be a great program, but not if you know, if he's got kids, obviously being a great dad is one of his core values. Is it you being a great dad. If you're not able to see your kids in the evening because your training, seven days a week. You know, if you're, if your work is massively important to you, then trying to stop for half an hour, six times a day too eager or you know, follow your regiment in nutrition plan that's not gonna fit.

So this is that key thing is, you know, you could write for anyone goal, you could probably write five or six programs or more that work, but there might only be one of them that resonates with you because it allows you to live out your values and that. So that's the main thing that people miss out on. Yeah, yeah. And again, man, like I love these conversations because like literally we are working on principles and we spoke about it before, it's like, you know, you and I might take the same person from point A to point B as long as we're following those principles, you know, and staying within those parameters. Like it doesn't really fucking matter what path we take, we need to figure out what's going, what tools are going to be appropriate for that person at that time in their life. Exactly. You know, funny enough, you know, you during covid, because everything has been going on, you went three weeks around Thailand you said about, you know, experienced Thailand that's a perfect example. Like this is a bigger picture thing rather than just nutrition because there's people who have been, you know, restricted by Covid their reaction because a lot of them, I don't wanna say they don't have any values, but they certainly don't have strong enough personal values.

The reaction has been great. I'm gonna watch five seasons of game of Thrones over two days. Whereas you've gone, look, you know, fitness is a massive value for me. Travel is a massive value for me, okay. Covid shit. I can't do what I wanted to do. I want to be working with my UFC fighters and so on, but I can't. So if I come back to my values have what's the best way I can implement those values right now? I'll get on my motorbike and three weeks around Thailand, you know, it's yeah, it's a it's a big picture thing. And again, these are the conversations people just either don't think about having or they don't want to have and that is exactly why the sets and reps and tempos and calories and stuff just never pan out because there's literally no foundation to. Yeah man, Yeah, that's a great point to add to that as well. I think, you know, I fucking think people are scared to answer those questions because how many people can look themselves in the mirror and say these are my values.

These are my character traits that I want in my life and my meeting those standards and if I'm not, I need to fucking do something about them. You know how many people have those conversations, man. And it's a difficult conversation to have, but it's absolutely necessary to have if you want to close the gap on, you know, where you're at right now a point a to where you want to be point be who you want to fucking be in your life, how you want to show up for, you know, yourself or your friends, your family, partner, Children, um, everyone that surrounds you, you know, you're, you need to contribute to society and if you're not fucking showing up for yourself, then you can't show up for other people. Yeah, people need to be very ready for some very difficult conversations with other people because for most people, they've gone through that, you know, a lot of their earlier life was based on what mom and dad expected them to do. You know, dad wanted to me to be a doctor, mom wanted me to do this and follow a certain religion, you know, all this kind of stuff. And then the school system funnels you into doing a particular degree because I've done that degree, it's what we could like a sunk cost, we'll put all that time and money into doing that degree.

So I have to do that job. I've been in this relationship for 15 years, so I have to keep, you know, um, and that's not to say you should be flitting around and just give up on stuff, but there comes a point where, like I said, if you can keep whether it's daily monthly, quarterly, whatever, come back to your values, assess everything that's going on in your life and just go, this just doesn't fit. You'll often find the root of your unhappiness, you know, which is the start of many things in terms of, you know, if you're unhappy, you're miserable, you're emotionally exhausted. You're not going to have the energy for training five times a week. And uh, you know, it is difficult because sometimes you then gotta say, right, well, you know, I'm earning six figures in my job, but I'm also fucking miserable. I go home and have to bury my face in a tub of Ben and jerry's or smash a bottle of wine. And again, when we come back around to the nutrition and training coaching, uh, it all comes back to stress and threat levels and things like that.

Again, I can sure I could print you out a program right now. I could send you in five seconds a program that's worked before from my laptop. But if you are so stressed that you're having to almost like medicate with a bottle of wine every night and the top of Ben and jerry's, the program is not gonna work. So unless I can help you to move through those stresses and unless you are willing to, it's not a case the right phone your boss tomorrow and quit your job. But what management strategies can you use And it is, this is the thing, we're coaching. You always end up going backwards as a coach. You get into it thinking right, I'll do my personal training to play and learn the magic training programs. Well, that doesn't work. We worked for personally, but not person be because person B's not following nutrition, why aren't they following the nutrition because they're not sleeping enough and therefore all sorts of things are happening, hormone lee and eventually you will always, if you keep digging deep enough, which you should as a coach, you will eventually come back to you.

If I cannot help someone find their values and and what resonates with themselves in life, then all of this is being built on quicksand. So people like me and you are always, like excited by this stuff because it opens up, it opens up, but people just don't do it just is it four sets? Or is it three? It squats or is it doesn't fucking matter, it's not going to work. You know what's really cool about these conversations, man, like every coach's corner, I've had, every single coach is like talking about the same shit, which is good and that's, that's like, it's important for people to hear this stuff. Um so many things there, man, um I do want to start diving into a couple of things to kind of provide some value. I mean, this has already been super valuable for myself and for numerous people who do listen consistently, I'm sure. Um, but what are your thoughts on New Year's resolutions? I'm probably going to come back to the same things that I don't like them unless there part of a bigger sort of goal setting program.

Like if you're there's a great book actually, if anyone listen to this, he's like reading about this stuff called the one Thing and largely the basis of the book is 12 weeks, One of my dad for 12 weeks. You know, typically we gotta hold your five year plan literally every five year, three year plan I've ever had never never panned out, But you know, 12 weeks is long enough to get results. It's long enough to ingrain habits is also kind of short enough to focus. So, You know, if you're saying right around my life on 12 week blocks, then I guess what I'm saying is yes to a new year's resolution, but only because it's the next 12 week phase. It's not really because it's new year. Um, so I don't have a problem with it. I just think like a lot of things in life, it's based around almost like bullshit, regimented ideas that someone else has created a bit like valentine's day and you know, things like this where someone else has created it, therefore I have to act in a certain way.

So yeah, I don't have a problem with them, I just think, you know, we we know full well that most people's New Year's resolutions don't work for precisely the reasons we've already spoken about. Like there's no, there's no foundation to it. It's just a, It's like a smash and grab set a random number gold. I'm gonna lose three stone. Yeah, I want to, I want to bring it back to, I want to bring it back to what you said before about um the different was that the different processes or the different methods spoke about the goal. Yeah, the goal based approach. And then you spoke about the, what was the next one? The process based approach, basically goal, goal approach, process approach and identity approach. Um, so it's if we can link that in Yeah, with New Year's like, great, we're always going to start with a goal. Like I said, I'm certainly not saying don't have a goal, but what I'm saying is you you then need to make sure before you start this New Year's goal you have the process in place and that process needs to be one that will fit in with your life.

And again, that's a it's a bit of ifs and buts because chances are, you will have to change some things. You don't need to change anything. You have the results already. But is it something that you can do relatively easily? Like we Yeah, twins pause there for a moment. I was on pause there for a moment because that's something that always comes up with my online clients. Like we start with moving in this direction and you know, I'll give them a little bit of what they want, but also a lot of what they need, which is literally my training philosophy, right? So um once we start going through that process and they start connecting the dots with how food makes them feel, um you know, the energy levels, their libido, their mood attitude, um all that type of stuff with, you know, their training sort of fucking hammering themselves at the gym every single time. They, you know, sometimes they train hard, sometimes they train a little bit lighter, sometimes they do whatever they feel like doing, you know, they're connecting the dots with these things and um for the most part, they're always like, you know, eight weeks, 10 weeks, 12 weeks and they're like, oh man, I'm fucking feeling so much better, but you know what I thought I wanted and where I'm at right now, like they, there was a disconnect there, you know, so I think that's uh that's an important thing is, is constantly reflecting and looking at those things and um you know, having that goal to work towards, but then focusing on the structure and the process that's going to get you there, but before you do that, before you have that structure in that process, you need to create that identity, You need to become the person that's going to um do those fucking things that you said, you're going to do and I want to bring it back to um what you said before about the one thing because I read that book probably about five or six years ago, and that's actually anyone who listens to the podcast knows that I turned my phone off at, you know, nine o'clock every night and I don't I don't use it for the last hour of the day, in the first hour of the day, and that's because I read that book, and basically in the book, it says, what's the one thing that I can do that is basically gonna make everything else easier or unnecessary?

And I was like, well I want to do this, I want to do this, I want to do that. You know, I want to build out my online coaching business, I want to build my website, I want to do this. And I was like, I'm gonna turn my phone off. I I initially started with, I'm not gonna use my phone in the first hour of the day, and then that turned into uh oh now I'm not going to use my phone in the last hour of the day either. So I've got that like two hour window on either side, the sleep, which then allows me to do the things that are important for me, and that's that's literally all it is, man, I fucking turn my phone off for the first hour of the day, and then that, that was a keystone habit that then turned into something else, then turned into something else and you know, instead of using my phone when I got up in the morning, I get up and um you know, read or I do something else and it's been, it was that one keystone habit that then transformed into all of these other habits as well. Yeah, that's a great point. You're a very disciplined kind of guy, but even how disciplined you are. You know, if I said you right, so when you told me you want to build your website and your online business, okay, I want you to turn your phone off three days a week and I want you to, you know, spend two hours on that.

Even you would have gone, it's just too much. This isn't for me, I think that this is what you often find is it's a case of starting with something that is slightly uncomfortable, but you're okay with him of Emhoff. I'm sure most of you guys would have heard of him whether or not they've actually gone through the methods but the he talks about home attic stress which is exposing ourselves to enough stress that we get an adaptation, but not enough that it's just like too much of a shock. And obviously he's talking a lot from the point of view of cold showers and swimming in ice and things like that and you know, I've been doing it myself. Like I hate going in cold seawater, it's my feet feel like they're gonna explode it. But I've been doing culture hours now for a month and even last night, you know, I used to be like, come on, I'm psyching myself up for this, like getting the music, I'm ready for a culture up. And even last night it was just put the cold on, stand there for three minutes, just chilling out.

And that can be applied to absolutely everything. Whether it is, it may be most importantly, things like nutrition, where if you suddenly try and change your diet, it's such a shock. Maybe now your partner's pissed off because their diet has to change. You suddenly feel crap for a week while all these chemicals are coming out of your body, you're getting caffeine withdrawal. And again, that was a big mistake I made as a coach is like, right, we need you to do all of this this week And then you're gonna get amazing results and if someone was capable of doing it then yes, they would. But the reality is that 95% of people just won't do. They need little steps. They could do it when they were motivated, but then three weeks later, when you know, fucking something happens at work, they get stressed out or whatever. Then all right now, I don't have time to train this day, Now I eat shit, now I'm sleeping poor and then that has a flow on effect. And you know, I think going back to what you just said then, man, you didn't fucking jump in the shower and have a three minute cold shower.

I'm sure you started like 10 seconds I a long time. Yeah, Yeah, yeah, exactly. But you know, you start at 10 seconds, you did that every day for a week and then you went 15 seconds, 20 seconds. You built it up over time, man, like that's the fucking point, right? It's like, you know, what's the one thing that you can do that's going to move in the right direction or what's the one thing that you can stop doing that's going to stop you from fucking sabotaging yourself and it needs to be challenging enough um, for you to have to build some discipline to do that. But it also needs to be easy enough that you can achieve it and you can start notching up those winds day after day after day because that's when it becomes a habit. Yeah, well I go back to my friend dax more, he, he introduced me to this idea of a change, change journal. In other words, you, you know, all you need is a piece of paper, a little calendar and you say right tomorrow, I need to have a cold shower. It almost doesn't matter whether it's 10 seconds, 30 seconds, but right, I did it and then I'll do it tomorrow and it becomes a bit of a game, like we all like to, we don't want to break the chain and I just want to keep doing it over and over and all of a sudden you will find that the pain of breaking that chain and seeing that black mark.

Yeah. Just just pause there for a second. Just for people listening. Um, J LT's like basically pretending to mark a calendar. He's putting X's on the days that he's doing this thing and then video. Yeah. It's literally just, you know, make up your own calendar by one. It doesn't matter how you do it. But you know, if you say maybe again, if you're working with a coach, what are the three key habits? I need to instill, where can I start? So it might be, you know, we talk about things like a liter and a half of water if you can drink a liter and a half for probably three times as much as you're in Thailand, but for us, normal people Over in England lead 2 1/2 is a good place to start. Um the sleep thing, can I spend eight hours in bed, even if sleep is not perfect the first time in bed for eight hours. You know, we'll work on the rest as we go. three key habits like that done for Even just three things like that done for 30 days, you will feel drastically different. And as you said before, what often happens and there's no way for you or I to prove this to clients.

They just have to kind of have a bit of faith is that you will feel different and you will want to do more after a week of drinking enough water and sleeping. And you know, I wrote asleep book precisely about all of this stuff and even little without getting to science. You know, the difference between sleeping for eight hours a day and four hours a day for just five days. It can change your insulin sensitivity by like 40%. So, you know, when we start, you know, you want to hear about the keto diet, you want to hear about should I eat carbs and all of this sort of stuff? If you're not sleeping, then, you know, if you're sleeping well, then almost to put it, it's not quite as simple as this, but you can eat and process more carbohydrates. If you eat them, process those carbohydrates better. You can train harder. You can do the program and so on and so forth. But it all starts from getting to bed for eight hours and just that, that little habit, nobody's saying that sleeping for eight hours is going to turn you into a fitness model. But what we do know is if you're not sleeping like that unless you're taking drugs and stuff to help you, it's very, very unlikely that you will become a fitness model.

You know. Mm, I saw something the other day. I can't remember what it was. I think my friend sent me a meme or something um was on their stories or something like that. But it was basically um sleep is an investment in your productivity the next day. And I was like, that's fucking brilliant. And that rounds out the second installment of The Coach's Corner episode with john Locke, Talk of Storm Force Fitness. Stay tuned for the next episode where we're going to dive a little bit deeper into creating clarity around your values and your character traits that are going to close the gap between where you're at right now and the person you want to become. If you found some benefit from this episode or any of the live train perform podcast episodes, please make sure you pass it off to your friends and family, anyone you think will benefit from the message. I don't get anything from these podcast episodes guys, it takes me a long time to put things together to get my guests on to research, to study, to put this content out, edit upload etcetera.

I'm doing this because I want to fucking help as many people as possible and I can do that by you guys, helping me spread the love by leaving me a five star rating and review much. Love guys piece

Coaches Corner: Goal, Process, and Identity based approaches to achieving your desired results
Coaches Corner: Goal, Process, and Identity based approaches to achieving your desired results
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