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Reflections: 19 August 2020

by Shaun Kober
August 20th 2020

In this short episode, I reflect on what I've been reading and watching over the past weeks and months, and reflect on the principles I've learned along the way, as well as how I've ... More

you're, what is up guys? Welcome to today's episode of the live train perform podcast. I'm your host, Sean koba. In today's episode, we are going through reflections now every two weeks on thursday I drop an episode 10 to 15 minutes long where I look at what's happening in my life and I reflect on, you know, some of those lessons that have that I've taken away from how I've lived my life and um have brought me up to being the man that I am today, the coach that I am today and also the team member that I am today. Now, the reason I bring this up is because over the weekend I watched my old rugby team play in the Grand final, Northern Territory, Rugby Union grand final, the casuarina Cougars played the Darwin Dragons and the Cougars ended up losing that game. So it was heartbreaking for me to see uh that unfold and the way that unfolded because they were leading the whole game and they were probably the better team on the day. But the they ended up giving away a penalty after the siren went and the opposition players stepped up and slaughtered the goal from right in front to put the boys out and they ended up losing by one point.

So um that's the whole idea. The whole concept of today's episode is to talk about and discuss the lessons that I've learned through all of the multiple teams that I've been a part of throughout my life now I grew up playing Rugby union and I've always been a part of team sports and then I transitioned to the military, I deployed to Iraq East timor and Afghanistan and I deployed to Afghanistan as part of a four man sniper team. Uh And then I got out of the army, I transitioned to being a pt and strengthen conditioning coach, uh focused on playing rugby for a year, um had a really good season with Katerina. Cougars went three years undefeated, didn't lose a game um and one, obviously three premierships in that time. Uh and then I transitioned into coaching other teams as well. I'm now the head strength and conditioning coach at Tiger muay thai in Phuket Thailand and something that always comes up for me is the pursuit of excellence, always striving to be better, always striving to do more.

Um and trying to improve myself not only myself but the people around me and today's episode is just going to touch on the different mindsets that I've encountered throughout those multiple um team environments that I've been a part of. So going back to the casuarina Cougars, um obviously it was devastating to see the boys go down in that fashion um and see basically all their hard work throughout the season go down the drain and end up as second place, but that's a, that's a good lesson, that's a life lesson, you know, that's what happens in life, there's fucking winners and there's losers. Um but it's the mentality, it's the mindset of how these teams bounce back, that really determines, you know, whether they succeed or whether they fail. So most of the most successful teams that I've been a part of have all had something in common, and that has been attitude. Everyone on the team knows what the mission is, they know what they're trying to achieve, they know what brings success and they show up, they put in the work there on time and they work for each other.

Um but the other part of that is that the best teams that I've been a part of and not afraid to step up and say when people aren't pulling their weight and call people out, when they're not doing what they're supposed to be doing, and this is a part of being humble, this is a part of humility, this is a part of being courageous, is putting in the time, energy and effort for something bigger than you, something larger than you, a bigger purpose than just yourself. Now, sports have given me some of life's greatest lessons, it's taught me the value of preparation, mindset, attitude, teamwork, perseverance, trust, integrity, patients, accountability and humility amongst other things, sports have given me some of my highest highs and also some of my lowest lows And it's always humbled me and it's always prove to me that if I want to work at something and I dedicate myself to it, then I can improve that and I can get better. I just need to put those 1%ers in day after day after day to, you know, move myself, progress myself in the right direction.

I never really considered myself as the most talented player, but I did work very hard off the field now, I had to do that because when I was playing in Darwin, I finished under sixteen's and there was no under eighteens competition. So if I wanted to continue playing, I had to play with the adults. So I was playing B grade and you know, I'm playing against dudes that are over 100 kg 110 120 kg and I was 65 kg wringing wet. So I had to put on some muscle, I had to go to the gym and start working hard to put on a little bit of size so that I could actually um take hits a lot better and go into contact and be able to absorb force a lot better. Um and I was a decent player in Darwin, but then I got a rugby scholarship in Sydney and I went to Sydney as a 17 year old and I rocked up to training and I was a good player in Darwin, but I got to Sydney and I was playing fourth grade, There was 80 - 100 dudes there and I was at the bottom of the pile again. So that was super humbling for me and I had a shitty attitude to start with because I thought I was better than that and I thought that I deserve to be playing in a higher grade, but I soon realized that I couldn't change anything about that.

And what I could focus on was getting into the gym, making myself stronger, making myself faster, making myself more powerful, putting on more size, um practicing my ball skills and working really hard off the field, so that all of those skills and attributes carried over on the field. And that is what allowed me to progress up through the grades and end up playing first grade colts predominantly for the next two years. Now, when I was 20 I ended up moving back to Darwin because I wanted to join the army and when I got back to Darwin, I went out on the pitch with the boys and all my mates that I grew up with were playing for Katarina Cougars and before I left for Sydney, I'd won a Premiership two premierships with Palmerston Crocs and the boys basically talked me into playing for Katarina. Now this was a tough decision, I'd played for a team that had won two premierships with and Katarina Cougars with the whipping boys of the competition, they were getting flogged every weekend. Um, but my mates were there, so I made the decision to go and play for them and you know, I didn't really think anything of it anyway because I was joining the army and I knew that I was going to be away for a lot of the year, but I ended up getting posted back to Darwin and playing for Katarina again and you know, we're getting hammered weekend week out and over the next couple of years, we ended up turning it around and uh, we got a new coach and I spoke about this in my last reflections episode and he shook the team up and created a whole new culture and I ended up becoming part of the leadership group and that really helped me grow as a player.

It helped me grow as a person and also helped me grow as a man. And as a later, because I had to take on more responsibility and I had to lead from the front. And that's what happened with the team. We ended up losing the 2000 and nine grand final after winning um, most of the games throughout that entire year. And then, you know, we bounced back the next year and went 2010, 2011, 2012 undefeated. But that was because of the mindset, that was because of the attitude that was because we were all working towards the same thing and there was no one that fucking put themselves above the team. And you know, that was a massive lesson for me, is that you can literally turn things around by putting in the right mindset, the right attitude and the right processes that are going to be moving you in the right direction, as long as everyone buys in and everyone's working on the same page and everyone's turning up for each other, you know, and also calling each other out when things aren't going right. You know, that was a big part of the culture, was stepping up and saying, Hey man, you're not pulling your weight, what's going on?

Is there anything that we can do to bring you up to speed? Do we need to stay behind after training and do some extras? Do we need to put in some work? You know, do we need to do some extra work on the weekend? You know, everyone was bringing each other up and that was a massive part of our success. Another part of our success was our attention to detail on the little things. Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out. And this is something that I brought from my time in the military and that was owning mistakes and stepping up and making things right and working harder to, you know, make amends if you did make a mistake. And it was little things that we did on the training paddock that carried over to the game. You know, we didn't accept the coach and myself, the leadership team did not accept people rocking up late. You know, obviously if there was a reasonable excuse, then fair enough, but you know, it was part of the culture when the team was losing was people would rock up whenever they want, people would skip the warm up so they could go straight into the drills, People were just being lazy and we stamp that out and completely turn the culture around and you know, I had a massive difference and you know, once we build that culture, then it was about implementing these small things at every single training session, if the ball goes to ground, you know, you dive on it, you don't just let the fucking ball bounce and put your hands on your hips and wait for the coach to blow the whistle and restart the play.

And it was these little things of showing up on time. It was these little things of, you know, being where you're supposed to be, when you're supposed to be. It was these little things of being there for your teammates and contributing. You know, there were times where we needed work parties and we need to get to games, you know, a couple of hours earlier so that we could set things up and people were always putting their hand up to do that. And that was because the leaders were leading by example and it was the team and it was the players that were putting their hands up and taking ownership and being accountable for their own actions which then contributed to a successful team environment and this is the biggest lesson that I've taken from sports. And that is if you do the right thing, the majority of the time, consistently over long periods results will follow. And I've got to say, I've been very lucky and super grateful to be a part of a lot of these teams that I've played with. A lot of very successful teams. I've won seven premierships in my life across league and union.

You know, some people play their whole life and never play in a grand final, let alone win one. Um, so super grateful for all the multiple teams that I've played with uh, and played for and represented. Um, and I just want to finish the episode with a quote from Charles swindle, which is all about attitude. The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life, attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past than education than money than circumstances, than failures, than successes than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company, a church a home. The remarkable thing is, we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing that we can do is play on the one string that we have and that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you were in charge of our attitudes, peace.

Reflections: 19 August 2020
Reflections: 19 August 2020
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