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Ep. 113 The Power of Yet

by Claudine Sweeney
January 26th 2022
Ever find yourself saying, "I can't"? When you say this, do you believe it to be true? Maybe it is true. For now at least. What if you added the word "yet" at the end of that sentence? Does it change ... More
This is episode 1 13. The power of yet you're listening to the Rise up and Shine podcast with Claudine and Ashley as an empty nester and a mom with young kids. We have both shared very similar and very real struggles from chaos to coaches. We now help other women live an authentic and meaningful life. So tune in weekly for girl talk and tips on how you too can rise up and let your light shine bright. This is the rise up and shine podcast. Mhm I can't stay organized yet and I cannot keep my plants alive in case you haven't figured it out today. We're talking about a powerful three letter word, the word yet and the impact it can have in your day to day life. And really when we're talking about the power of yet, it all comes down to our mindset, whether we have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset.

And one thing I know is we're learning a lot about this with, through my kids and their schools. They're talking a lot about it in schools, which I think is fantastic. I think it's such a great tool to teach Children, but also as parents and adults, we haven't necessarily learned this nor have we really been aware of it. What is the fixed mindset? I actually had to google it when the kids were first learning it. What does that mean? I read a whole book on it writes a great book about the growth mindset powerful. That's great. But with the power of yet what happens is we if we don't add that three little words in to the end of the sentence, we can keep ourselves stuck right? We can keep ourselves very limited to what we can do because we function or we do based off of our abilities and our skill and we tend to just stay there right? And that's having more of a fixed mindset. Whereas if you want to grow and learn and develop and that's of high value to you, then you tend to have more of a growth mindset. I look at the word yet as the antidote to the word can't, that's good.

Like I can't yet right. It takes the sting out of the discouragement. The limitations of the words can't and I don't know about you and your kids. But when my kids were little, we heard a lot of that. I can't, I can't, I can't write. But even as an adult I struggle with it, I want to say I can't all the time. I can't like Last week I was true. It feels very true. I mean last week I was working on Facebook ads, this is new to me and I really probably said I can't 13 times. I mean I can't get my brain is killing me. Yeah, in a given hour. But I had to keep saying yet that's why we came up with this topic because I had to use the word yet to help me stay motivated and get myself out of a slump of discouragement. And you know, really what it does to is it acknowledges where you're at, right? It doesn't deny, it doesn't deny where you're at, but it does acknowledge, okay, this is a challenge for me right now. I don't know how to do this right now, but there's also the possibility that you can learn and you can grow and you can develop.

And that's what I exactly what I tell my kids. I mean it's constant like with my kids when they say it all the time, I always check myself to what areas of my life and my saying this because we tend to, especially as moms and I still have young kids, I want their life to be great and free of pain and I want to help fix all their problems. And so I'll try to encourage them or give them help. And um, you know, certain strategies they can use. They don't always want to hear it at this point yet, but they will one day, that's right. But for ourselves, we, we can get stuck because it feels true and sometimes it is true, right? I'm not great at organizing. And when I try to write, thank you, when I try, I fail because I'm learning, but I take that failure as seats as proof. I'm not organized. I can't do it. I can't, I can't, I can't write and I love the power of the word. Yet. It it brings to mind that we all have the ability and empower to improve, right?

We can always grow. We can always improve. We can always learn. And it it just gives us hope. Like it gives me hope. Word. Word word and I don't think we talked about it enough or use it enough. I really have started using it in my own life and it just helps me just get out of that little slump because you're right. It's like, it's not denying, I don't know how to run facebook ads yet. Yeah, I don't, but I can learn. I have the ability to improve. I have the ability to read and watch Youtube videos and have no shortage of information. Yeah. So you can take online classes for like everybody for everything. You can learn. You can learn how to get organized on an online class. Oh yeah, Yeah. I'm trying. So and you know, we think about a baby walking. We don't get discouraged when a baby is uh, before it can even crawl, it just lays there and then it it crawls, right? And then it eventually will walk, but we don't look at a baby and get so discouraged that baby can't walk yet.

You know, we don't, we don't look at it and say get all discouraged with the baby because we know that it will grow and improve a process. It's a process, right? We know, okay, the baby crawls and then the baby walks. And when we talk about a baby, it's like, yeah, he can't he can't walk yet because we know that the baby will walk. But do we have that same confidence for the things in our lives that we want to improve? Really struggle with that. We just stopped like I can't do it as proof proof proof and we give up, you surrender not in a good way. We put our hands up and go, yeah, I'm done. I can't do this. And then when we do that over and over and over, it leaves us feeling just like a failure, right? I know even in brotherhood, especially with, um, you know, in my coaching program and with other moms especially stay at home moms, that's who I focus on primarily. But we think that we're failing all the time. We're not living up to our expectation of what we should be doing or how we should feel.

And we disempower ourselves all the time based off of the I can't I can't and some of that is even I can't stay calm, right? Or I can't stay present with my family. I'm constantly distracted. So there's a lot of these things that come up for stay at home moms and moms in general. Really that again, we can add that three little three letter word yet, right? I can't stay present yet, but I can learn how to what is distracting me and it makes you more proactive to go after what you really want in your life. Well, that's the power of it and that's why we're talking about. So let's share a few practical Zwick our listeners on how we can use the power of yet to really improve our lives to give us hope and um take us out of being stuck with discouragement or limitations. Yeah, So the first practical is checking your Bs and what I mean by that is your belief system.

Our belief system is a driving force of our behavior and our actions, which also leads to how we feel, which leads to the results, right? What we get. Um and so it's really important to check your belief system because our beliefs feel true, but they are just limitations and they're based off of our experiences, right? That's not truth. We hold it as such, like a fact of life, right? Right. And so there's times, yes, it, you know, we've said these things over and over and over. I can't I can't I can't and we say it about the same, the same things over and over and over. And so then we ingrain it into our brains that, okay, it's true. That feels true. Yes, it's wired in there and it it's hard for us to change and grow because we are fixed in that place in that mindset. And so the awareness of it, of what beliefs do I have um plays a huge role in whether we are going to achieve a certain thing that we're going after and that's a huge one because sometimes our belief systems are unconscious, We don't even really know, we have some programs that are running our life that we're not even consciously aware of.

It's just there from our childhood or from our early adulthood. There's things that we believe that we don't even know that we believe like a long time ago, years ago I really understood that I had a belief system about money that was unhealthy, was really unhealthy for me. And um, but I didn't know that. I believe that for a long, long time and through prayer and through just reading and doing this work. Um getting coached, I learned, oh, I have this belief and it's really limiting. It was able to bring yes to the surface, yeah. Bring it to the surface. Then. I can be intentional about that thought. Like, do I want to keep believing this or do I want to change that is serving me well, it was not, it was not. So it's time to change that, do something differently. But I love that one. I think for me, another practical is just add the word yet at the end of every, I can't or I don't like I don't have time yet. I can't like I said, manage to take care of my plants yet.

I really have killed quite a few plants. I'm really trying to keep them alive. So I've got to learn and you're, you're going to help me with my fiddle leaf tree that lost all its leaves. It's funny because I was telling the kids, I think this morning we're talking, oh, my daughter was like, mom, you forgot to trim back the orchid because you know, the parents died all the flowers fell and like I know and she's like, I thought you wanted that plan. I said, I don't purposely go out there to buy more responsibility. Yeah. Right. That was actually given to me. Yeah, that's so funny. But add the word yet at the end of every, every time you catch yourself yourself saying I can't or I don't or any negative, add the word yet at the end and see if this doesn't change your mood and see if you don't feel more hopeful if you don't feel more, I don't know, confident really like, Oh yeah, I don't yet. I can't, but there's opportunities. There's opportunity I can research.

I can take it out. You might know how to do this. I can get their input and teach me your ways. I tell you that. Well lifting right? It's enough lifting word and we think about, you know, here on rise up and shine. We're always trying to share things that will help us rise up to be lifted up to be empowered to be confident to just live life a little lighter. You know, a little four more little more full of love and light. Number three is be patient. This is so important because what happens for us human beings is we feel like we need to accomplish this right now. We need to learn this right now and or it's either I have the skill and ability or I don't and so I guess I don't know. Well, you know, I guess it's not in the cards for me, but being patient with the process. No, it's the process. That's so important because if we're not being patient with ourselves there, we're just going to keep stumbling and fumbling and falling and not learning from our mistakes.

Not learning from our failures. Um and failures is not a bad thing. It's not a bad word. It's your friend. It learn from it. There's lessons there to help you grow and learn and get better whatever you're trying to go after. But being patient with yourself is so crucial because unfortunately we do that all the time. We give up on ourselves, We're not patient. We don't accept the process. I'm not there yet. I'm not there yet and sometimes we can even use yet as an excuse but I'm not there yet. I'm never going to figure it out and we can start complaining about it and then we're just going to sit in that space and that's not really what we want, right? It feels justified. It feels true. It feels well, I guess it's not going to work out for me. I don't know if you notice my UKulele over there when the kids during the pandemic and virtual school, I'm like, well I'm going to learn how to play the UKulele. Well, the virtual school didn't quite pan out the way I expected it to. I thought they'd be great and they'd be very involved and engaged and they wouldn't really need my guidance. But that totally took a different turn. So I haven't learned the UKulele yet.

I have learned a song one song. Okay. I started learning to I probably forgot it because I didn't keep it up because life moments happened. And you know, it's pretty funny priority took up the UKulele anyway. I know because I envisioned myself sitting on the beach. Yeah, myself with the wind in my hair, do what my husband says. He says you live in a movie like you live in a movie in your head. Like I don't you need to come back to reality that movie. He used to tell me that when the kids were little. So being patient. I love that because it reminds me again of our baby metaphor. You know, we're we're very patient with a baby learning how to walk. We don't get upset. We don't lose our confidence in our patients when a baby isn't walking by seven miles up seven months now you should be running, but yet we're confident and It reminds me of the scripture, you know, in hebrews 11 1 faith is the assurance of things you have hoped for. The absolute conviction that there are realities you've never seen.

And I love that this is out of the voice message. But I think about a baby like we're confident that our baby is gonna walk right. We know that we're like, this is normal. And yet for ourselves, sometimes when we're trying to learn something new or we want to have a shift in our life or change something, we don't have that same confidence. So there's really a call. My fourth practical is really have faith in the possibilities, right? Just believing that, you know, I believe that I can keep a plant alive. It is possible. I believe I can learn facebook ads. It is possible. I believe you can learn how to be organized. It is possible. It is, it is so having faith getting possibility, right? Yeah. We have to have faith in that and believe that absolutely. It's so empowering. And it's good reminders for us to, you know, we have done this work, we have been coached, we do coach others. We have the practical. Sometimes life happens and we kind of fall back a little into those old habits again, right? But we have the wherewithal now to know, Oh yeah, I know what I need to do.

But that's why we're sharing this with you, our friends, our listeners because I, we know a lot of you in our conversations. You are, you do get stuck there. We've been there both Claudia and I have been there and that's why we are so passionate to share these tools with you through the podcast, through our coaching programs um because we know the possibilities. We've experienced the possibilities and the hope and to see when we hold onto the hope of, you know, going after a certain goal we might have and whether that's even just feeling better in life, you know, whether it's a tangible goal or just feeling better and more abundant and experiencing life to the full whatever that is for you. But the power of yet is so important to remember that, you know, there are possibilities and be open minded and you know, be hopeful and sometimes it could be really hard, but again, it goes back to a lot of what we're focusing on when we do focus on the I can't or I don't, there we live there. We sit right, I mean, I know over, let's see about a year ago, I was talking about how overwhelmed I was right with the actual school and all this stuff and trying to build our coaching businesses and the podcast and you know, all these things and I'm so overwhelmed, I'm so overwhelmed and you, it was just so profound and so simple.

You're like, do you think you're feeling overwhelmed because you keep saying you're overwhelmed ah perhaps and I was limiting myself there rather than okay, this is overwhelming right now, but there is the possibility to move on, right, this is the time, this is the season, there are things I can do you know to um to grow and to kind of change how life is going for me and not feel so overwhelmed one, not fixating on it for sure, right? Don't fixate on what you can't do right? Because you haven't added the word yet. Exactly, and it really is powerful at how it changes how you feel, you'll feel more empowered, you'll feel hopeful you'll feel there are possibilities, you're right, you're right, I can, I can learn and it's so important to have that growth mindset and lastly our last practical is just persevere, just like a baby again, learning how to walk, they fall so many times, right? And they keep getting up, I just watched my granddaughter learn how to walk and she kept falling and falling and falling and falling, but she kept persevering and persevering.

Now she walks now she runs now she has this cute little habit of whenever we call, she runs to the front door to touch it and then comes back to the phone, it's very odd but it never fails, we talked but she persevered and now she's a full on walker, So we have an episode that we did all in perseverance, episode 97 if you want more tools and practical Zahn, how to persevere and what it is to persevere. But with the power of yet keep persevering, just adding the word at the end. Be patient, have faith in the possibilities and keep on keeping on until next time. Alright, everyone, thank you for joining in on our conversation today here on the Rise up and Shine podcast. If you haven't already, please take a second to hit that subscribe button. So you never miss an episode and while you're at it, share this episode with a friend who you know it can bless today if you want to visit us as well on our websites, you can catch Claudine over at Claudine Sweeney dot com and Ashley at Mind over chaos dot com.

Our links are in the description. We also have some free resources there for you as well. So remember ladies, no matter what you are facing in life, it is never too late to rise up and shine and live your best life

Ep. 113 The Power of Yet
Ep. 113 The Power of Yet
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